I need you to need me.
Story of my life, I swear to God. Finally meet a good, kind, cute, STRAIGHT man and WHAM! Out of the woodwork come crawling ten more.
It's like reverse Karma. Everything you've ever wanted will come to you . . . after you've already decided on something else. And I know, I know, it has nothing to do with King. I love him and his crazy ass. It's me. I'm obsessed with the Honeymoon period. Once the glitz and glamma runs out of a relationship, I go running to someone else.
I'm a weenie.
There, I said it. I admit it. Once I have to REALLY give and REALLY care and REALLY be there, and not just because I have a cute outfit on, sh*t starts to feel claustrophobic and I start to get running. Immature, childish, cowardly — go ahead, pile it on, I can take it. Because here I am again, flirting with strangers.
Get the rest after the jump.
Perhaps it's my way of feeling like I'm still Me even though I am now part of a We? I know he would never even think about flirting, it would never cross his mind. That's just the kind of person he is. He's like hot chocolate on a cold winter's day — hot chocolate will not let you down and neither will he. I, on the other hand, am paragonable to Vodka — sounded like a good idea at the time and it was good times for a while, but it will be the worst hangover you ever had.
But this is where I am at, every time I think of what would happen if I ever became a big enough asshole to cheat on him, and just the thought of him suffering for something I did makes me feel like throwing myself under a bus. And this is how I know I love him.
Way more than I thought I did.
Peace, love and cupcakes,