"Now I have something to say, but this here — whatchamacallit? — microphone won't work, dagnabbit! I've seen them youngins put these talking devices up to their ears like this, but that ain't doing any good for me now. Lesse here. How 'bout I flip it upside down like so? Nah, no good. Ya know, that's what's wrong with the world today. Technology does more harm than good with all these 'technical difficulties' we get all the damn time. When I was a kid. . .oh? Hold it like this. Oh, OK."