DearSugar Needs Your Help: How Can I Move on From This Betrayal?


DearSugar and Betrayed Becky need your help. She was hurt by her ex and her best friend and she doesn't know what to do. She misses them both but is still devastated by their actions. Do you have any advice for her?

Dear Sugar,

I broke up with my boyfriend about a month ago, but we have been in contact ever since. I ended things with him because I never really trusted him. He's disappointed me multiple times throughout our one-and-a-half year relationship, and I just knew he wasn't the one for me in the long run.

I couldn't bear to break up with him so I lied and said I didn't believe in marriage (it's his dream to get married), and that prompted him to break up with me. Despite all that, I still miss him and love him.

However, recently I heard that my ex got together with my best friend the very day after we broke up! I was shocked — I felt betrayed, angry and used. When I confronted my ex about this, he denied it. But when I confronted my "best friend," she confirmed it. I sent various angry emails to my ex, one moment forgiving him, another scolding him. Now all we have is sourness and bitterness, but at times, I still think of him and sometimes I still miss her.

How do I get over this betrayal and anger I feel? Is there any way I could rectify my friendship with my ex, or with my friend? And should I? — Betrayed Becky

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