Dear Poll: Would You Tell Your Friend If He Was Just Not That Into Her?

February 10, 2009

The results were pretty evenly distributed in yesterday's poll on whether or not women were portrayed fairly in He's Just Not That Into You, and in fact, a lot of you said you could relate to Gigi's over the top antics. I think we've all been there, as love can be blinding, but watching a friend who's visually impaired in the name of love can be frustrating and often exhausting.

In order to be a good friend, it's important for us to support each other, even if it means telling her the cold hard truth. So ladies, if you knew a guy was just not that into your friend, tell me, would you feel comfortable being the bearer of bad news?

Source

24 Comments

sucraRush 4 years 13 weeks

I think that it really depends on the situation. Btw, I really hate it when they start denying it although it is true.

LittleMzFit 4 years 13 weeks

Emalove, I agree with you. I think it depends on the friend. Some friends you can be brutally honest & some you have to be more gentle. I have one friend that I knew she wouldn't listen to me, so I did not say anything. She's divorced from the jerk now. They were a bad match, but it wasn't her, it was him. I knew he was bad news. I would hope my friend would tactfully tell me.

MickLove 4 years 14 weeks

I never give unwanted or unasked for advice. Anyway: If a gal wants to believe that the guy is a keeper, nothing can change her mind. And there is always the part about being the messenger's being shot.

MickLove 4 years 14 weeks

I never give unwanted or unasked for advice.Anyway: If a gal wants to believe that the guy is a keeper, nothing can change her mind. And there is always the part about being the messenger's being shot.

dm8bri 4 years 14 weeks

Wow, I must be lucky in friends, because I've never ever had to do that. But, knowing me and the kind of upfront and honest friendships I have, I would definitely do it should the need arise. That said, if it's a passing fling and I know she'll figure it out eventually, I wouldn't say anything. However, if it's more serious (to her) and the guy was stringing her along, I would put my foot down...hard.

designerel 4 years 14 weeks

Hmm I've actually never had to do it. I think I would tell her though, in the gentlest way possible.

pixelhaze 4 years 14 weeks

Oh man I have so many friends that I have wanted to say that to, at some point, and I just can't! They just wouldn't believe and would keep making excuses, lol. I find it is more effective to make them see why they are not that into him either ;)

macchiatolove 4 years 14 weeks

I think I usually do. My friends usually pick it as well, so I'm sure I'd be able to tell them, although maybe in a nice way, not a blunt way

mack2600 4 years 14 weeks

always.

lily3484 4 years 14 weeks

So funny, after seeing this movie, a close friend told me about a guy she had a date with and then he bailed. I immedietly thought about this movie (she saw it too) but my friend did NOT. I was gonna bring up the obvious that he was just not into her but I couldnt bring myself to do it. She kept making excuses for why he did not call her and so on. I think sometimes women just don't want to believe what might be the reality of the situation.

lindssaurussss 4 years 14 weeks

if she is asking about his behavior like not calling then I would say maybe hes not the guy for her. or a dick. no matter what i would be supportive, take the advice or not and when she comes back upset he wasnt into her. i would still try to cheer her up.

sourcherry 4 years 14 weeks

I'd tell her if it was pretty obvious that he wasn't into her. But if I don't know that for sure, I'm not going to tell her "forger about it" when I could be wrong...

emalove 4 years 14 weeks

Yes. My best friends and I have always told each other the truth, even if it meant being brutally honest. I wouldn't ever want to watch one of them making a fool of herself.

RockAndRepublic 4 years 14 weeks

Yeah, they don't listen. Then they come back to you all butt hurt.

Miss Senorita 4 years 14 weeks

Indeed that's my friend and I would expect them to tell me if the roles were reversed.

candace87 4 years 14 weeks

Depending who it is. Well, I guess the only friends of mine who would need to be told that someone probably wasnt into them, are the ones I wouldn't want to tell. They would just say I don't understand the situation or that this time it's different. The friends who would be okay to hear it.. have already figured it out on their own.

GScott86 4 years 14 weeks

Why bother, they won't listen anyway. Or they don't care.

babysoftpink 4 years 14 weeks

I voted for depends on the situation and the friend. Again, I repeatedly want to emphasize that no one knows the future. Today, you confront your friend about a situation which you may not have a whole picture on and that you also don't know what the future holds for your friend. What if, the guy you remarked as "not that into her" ended up marrying your friend one day? Your friend may tell her husband about your remark of him if that certain remark is so very memorable, how do you think your relationship with your friend's life partner is going to be from the get go? Why then, would you risk your friendship when you could just hold your tongue and keep your mouth shut? Unless of course, when your opinion is clearly solicited and not when she just wants to vent and you add your hurtful opinion without knowing what the future holds for your friend and that man.

hope2be 4 years 14 weeks

Ehh...depends on the friend. I mean, I have friends who want to be coddled, and there are those who really want the 'harsh' truth (of my opinion). Regardless, they do what they want to in the end LOL. So it doesn't matter really.

hope2be 4 years 14 weeks

Ehh...depends on the friend. I mean, I have friends who want to be coddled, and there are those who really want the 'harsh' truth (of my opinion).Regardless, they do what they want to in the end LOL. So it doesn't matter really.

teegaall 4 years 14 weeks

I did this once in college. A guy friend told me that he thought my "best friend" was immature and saw her as a little sister. I wouldn't have said anything to her but the next day she started raving about what a great guy he was and general dating stuff. So, under the belief that I was saving her from some embarrassment, I told her that he wasn't into her that way. I may have said that he saw her as a little sister but I know that I left out the immaturity part. After I went to lunch and came back, she returned to the room from the shower and started sobbing uncontrollably. I probably should've figured that with her being such a drama queen, she would have reacted that way. But it would've been better than having to deal with her crying after he had told her that he didn't want to date her with me not having at least warned her.