Dear Poll: Has a Rebound Relationship Ever Worked Out For You?

March 4, 2009

There seems to be an unspoken rule that rebound relationships end in heartbreak, but I happen to think they're just more of a gamble than an absolute disaster waiting to happen. Yes, going through the motions with someone when your/his heart is clearly somewhere else isn't fair to either party, but love has no boundaries, so who says it can't work out? I may just be a sucker for love so tell me, in your dating experience, has a rebound relationship ever become something more?

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30 Comments

2 years 1 day

I started dating a coworker when I was going through a terrible divorce. Only now, 10 years later, do I realize that he was my "rebound." Unfortunately, I never loved him and only married him because the relationship was "easy." It is amazing how there is absolutely no drama when you just don't care about someone. However, I wouldn't recommend it...it is worth the drama to have deep, passionate love!

2 years 31 weeks

I had a bad on again/off again kind of thing with a guy who I thought was the one. The guy proposed, and although we had been doing this on again/off again thing for 13 years, the engagement period only lasted 2 months. He treated me horribly, always had, and I just grew up and out of it. I had met and had been talking to a great guy just prior to the bad man's re-entry into my life. I had maintained contact through the engagement. It was only a friendship....but lo and behold, hewas so amazing, supportive, non pressuring, and he never bad mouthed the fiancee during the engagement even though he knew he was being an abusive jerk. That friend and I are dating now. I am crazy about him. He treats me entirely opposite of my former fiancee. You can call it a rebound, but frankly, he is the result of learning from the school of hard knocks that the former relationship was worthless to begin with.....I deserve the "rebound" guy, and love him. There are many reasons one would move on quickly after a break up. Some are legitimate.

dikke kus 3 years 43 weeks

I guess it depends. There's rebound and then there's bouncing around. I think if your ready for moving on but still feeling a bit of a backlash there's nothing stopping you from having another relationship that could work out better. My parents use that term, and said they met when they were on the rebound. So I guess to me it means they were both hurt and moved onto something better.

3 years 46 weeks

Well -- he was a good guy. It would have been a good relationship but I was not in the place to let any feelings blossomed. The relationship ended because he was a rushing me along... I needed time. I'd just broken up with my ex 2 mths prior! When I break up, it's just good to have companionship and affection. I just want a man's presence. I'm not thinking about love and committment.

kh61582 4 years 10 weeks

I said no but to be fair the only serious relationship I've ever had was a rebound. I was never actually involved with the first man but my heart was very much involved. The rebound relationship lasted a long time but I was kidding myself the whole time. We just recently broke up and the main reason is that I never had the kind of feelings I should have had because I was still stuck on Man #1 so in my experience No rebound never works.

sparklestar 4 years 10 weeks

I don't know! Yes and no? All of my relationships have been a run over from the last one because I'm pretty insecure and hate being alone. I basically NEEDED the last rebound relationship to ensure that I was completely over my ex-boyfriend. It was a good outlet for all of the pent up aggression I had and all of the feelings that were still swimming around. I generally don't have more than 6 months between relationships? Sometimes they have crossed over. My friends motto is that "the new one is there to rescue you from the last!" So true in my case! I think it can be therapeutic. When you break up with somebody you think you are never going to be loved again and it can help you get back onto the horse. I have no shame in the way I approach relationships.

BalletBunny 4 years 11 weeks

Yes :) I've been in my "rebound" relationship for over 5 years now. I think it worked out because we took it very slowly in the beginning so I had the space to get over my ex even though I'd already started dating someone else.

LoveSarah 4 years 11 weeks

It seems that when I end one relationship another one falls into my lap. Most of the time those rebound relationships didn't work out, which was fine because we were together for such a short amount of time that I wasn't fully invested, by my current boyfriend (We've been together almost 4 years now) started dating about 2 months after my 2 year relationship with my ex ended. So, I had some time to move on, but not a whole lot. But my boyfriend and I couldn't be happier, and even though he doesn't admit it I was a rebound for him, too. (He moved across country to be with this girl, and when he got there she broke up with him!! So he moved back to be with me :))

Miss Senorita 4 years 11 weeks

I don't do rebounds.

aimeeb 4 years 11 weeks

Eh. I've never been one to date someone right after a long tern relationship or date another person who just got out of one. To me if the person dated someone else significantly, more than 2 yrs they will surely need some time to recoup. I guess for some people it could work but I'd still be uneasy being that other person or dating someone myself when I still needed some me time.

Spectra 4 years 11 weeks

My husband was my rebound guy, too. Actually, I wasn't ever really "dating" the guy I had been involved with before I met my husband. I was just very, very infatuated with this guy and he was leading me on...he even asked me to travel to Europe with him. Well, needless to say, when we got to Europe he transformed into a giant asshole and I found out what a jerkoff he was. After I got back from the trip, I swore I wouldn't date anyone for at least a year. Well, about a month after I got back, I met my husband and he was just such the opposite of the douchebag I left that I completely fell for him and I'm pretty glad I did!

graylen 4 years 11 weeks

I'm engaged to mine!

pippins_halfling 4 years 11 weeks

I've never had one, but I do have a friend whose rebound relationship has turned into a serious one.

GigiGirl13 4 years 11 weeks

Not really I don't go out a lot... I have aboyfriend and I stick to him until he breaks up with me or it just isn't working... I would never cheat either like the first girl did (No offense).

oohsexypenguin 4 years 11 weeks

My husband was my rebound. :)

emalove 4 years 11 weeks

I don't know that I've ever dated someone when I still had feelings for another person...I've definitely gone on dates quickly after a breakup, but I was always ready for those dates. So I don't consider that "rebounding".

EvilDorkGirl 4 years 11 weeks

OMG. I voted no and then I just realized that my husband was the rebound guy. Although I had a HUGE crush on him when I was with my last boyfriend, so I'm not sure if it counts as a rebound...

Leila07 4 years 11 weeks

Yep. The relationship I am in now is a "rebound". But I had fell out of love with my ex so I was totally ready to move on with a great guy.

lizrocks 4 years 11 weeks

I was a rebound for my husband. He'd just gotten out of a bad relationship of 2 years when we got together and he's never looked back. (I'm sure it helps that it wasn't a healthy relationship and he was glad to be out of it.)

GlowingMoon 4 years 11 weeks

As for me, no. My current husband was almost my rebound guy. However, at the time, I had the emotional wherewithal to not treat him that way. I had known my husband for a long time, and he was a good man (someone to settle down with, take home to Mom,etc, not mistreat as a rebound man). I told him I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, and I was not ready to start over with anybody else. Bless my husband, he respected where I was coming from, and he waited for me. We were casual friends (occasional lunch buddies). After several months (and I recovered from my last relationship), he asked me on our first date. The rest was history.

aklatina 4 years 11 weeks

i was in a relationship with a horrible guy, would ignore me, had horrible higine and always chose his pals over me, then his friend was always the one to open my door, ladies first, take my hand when it was icy out and tell me i looked beautiful everyday. needless to say he told me i deserved better even if it wasn't him but that i deserved someone to love me fully, every day every hour. so when i broke up with my bf, i started dating his friend who was really MY friend, and now where VERY happily married working on a family...

vmruby 4 years 11 weeks

I've never been involved in a rebound relationship and the few relationships I did have were long term.When they ended I always took a break for a little while to regroup and experience being single before I could even begin thinking about starting to date again......

MartiniLush 4 years 11 weeks

I married him! :-)

Hiding55 4 years 11 weeks

I had one rebound guy and looking back I basically used him as a crutch to get out of my past relationship. I was craving attention and he gave it to me and it ended terribly because after a while I grew bored of him and broke it off and he was still really into me. He wanted to at least be friends like we were before we dated and slept together and for a few weeks I tried that but he was still trying to get me to be his gf so I cut off all communication. Now we don't even talk to each other anymore.

miss malone 4 years 11 weeks

I have actually never had a "rebound" relationship.. I always like to give myself a little time before I start seeing someone new.

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