Dating a Family Friend

Group Therapy: Attracted to a Family Friend

June 8, 2010

This question comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!
I need some advice. I recently met a friend of my aunt's who is 9 years my senior. We spent the whole night flirting etc, I mentioned my attraction to my mother and father and they both said he is to old for me (I am 25 he is 34). I don't see the big deal at all and I am ready to go for it. My only problem is I am not sure how to approach this man because I rarely see him and he is friends with my family. Any ideas or suggestions? He is really an amazing man and I haven't felt this way about someone in a long time or is it a lost cause?

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8 Comments

TheEnchantedOne 2 years 50 weeks

Looks like your family's already well informed about you liking the guy. I say ignore the age difference. If he's trustworthy (ask your aunt) and responsible, take the chance. Seems like the feeling's mutual, so my advice is to just make yourself visible on functions where he's present. Just be there, be open and outgoing. If he doesn't take the bait, then I guess it was just "flirting" for him and nothing more. You did your part.

TheEnchantedOne 2 years 50 weeks

2 years 50 weeks

age difference = not a big deal at all. my husband is 35 and I'm 24, and i love that he's older - plus, men mature more slowly than women on average - and honestly, i think our relationship works better because of the age difference. i agree about waiting for him to show interest in you, though, but i'm more old-fashioned than some and prefer being pursued to being the pursue-er. just me though.

socalbeachgal 2 years 50 weeks

I don't think the age difference is an issue but that he is a family friend could pose the problem like others have said. I would wait to see if he contacts you or the next family gathering. Good luck.

kimmieb124 2 years 50 weeks

I agree with skigurl about waiting for him to pursue you. Personally, I don't think the age difference is a big deal, but the fact that he's a family friend complicates things. If you pursue him and he didn't feel a connection, that could make things very awkward for you at the next family function that he attends not to mention making things awkward with you between your parents (who already stated their opinion) and with your aunt who you persumably have to ask to get his contact information since you don't mention that you exchanged contact information already. Like skigurl said, if he felt a connection that he wants to pursue he will figure out how to get in touch with you. He doesn't have the awkward family boundaries to get through that you have.

skigurl 2 years 50 weeks

To be honest, I would wait for him to contact you. If he felt the connection and wants to pursue, he will figure out how to do so. If he doesn't, then get excited for the next time you see him at a family function. That's just me though.

flynnN 2 years 50 weeks

go for it but date privately until it is actually a relationship before you bring him around your familymy fiance is 35 and i am 27 so there is a age difference. But there really isnt noone had a problem with it.

flynnN 2 years 50 weeks

go for it but date privately until it is actually a relationship before you bring him around your family my fiance is 35 and i am 27 so there is a age difference. But there really isnt noone had a problem with it.

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