Thanks to everyone who pitched in on this week's Come Story Telling With Me. And now for the completed story!
"Mark, I'm so embarrassed. That's never happened to me before, it must have been all the sake we drank last night . I've never farted THAT loud in public!"
Mark shook his head and said, "Well, it wasn't so much the fart, it was that you pooped your pants afterwards." "Do you think your friends will ever let me live down that smell?" "It's not like they thought very highly of you in the first place." "Thanks, now I feel so much better!!!" "You know I didn't mean it like that. I just don't think you hang out with the best people. You should chose some friends that are more like my friends," he finished.
"YOUR friends?" I said. "YOUR friends are judgmental snobs. There's nothing wrong with my friends at all. They may not be the most cultured or well-bred people, but at least they're friendly and fun." I stood up and started grabbing my things. I was pissed, I needed to get away from Mark for a while and clear my head. As I started to walk out I thought 'Maybe Pat will help me'. So I hoped in my car and drove across town to have a talk with Mark's mother, Pat, who also happens to be one of the coolest women I know. I don't think she ever got over her Woodstock phase, but she always knows what to say and is awesome at cheering me up.
Sure enough, when I entered the front door, she was sitting expectantly on the couch with two cups of herbal tea like she knew I was coming. "Hi sweetie!" Pat smiled at me. "Come sit down." "Hey Pat," I greeted cheerfully. As I approached her to give her a big hug, I noticed she was burning some incense. 'Hmm that's strange,' I thought. 'I thought she hated incense. She's always said that it smells too strong.'
"I was just watching Showtime" Pat said "this one particular show really reminds of my misspent youth" she laughed.
It was pretty strange because Pat's hair was messy, her clothes looked thrown on — something was not right. "Pat can I get a glass of water?" I asked. "Sure sweetie" as I walked to the kitchen I peeked in Pat's room and oh my god there was the most gorgeous hunk of a man ever to have graced the earth wearing only his boxers!! He looked over at me sheepishly and then gave me a wink before he was out the door.
"Misspent youth indeed." I muttered. "Pat, who is that man in your room?" I asked as I got back into the living room.
"That's Ryan, Mark's best friend from college. We've been getting together for the past 12 years for a little fun. Mark better not here about this or I will be in big trouble so keep you mouth shut my dear!"