Browsing through a local San Francisco glossy this week, I came across an open letter to single women written by Jane Ganahl, author of Naked on the Page: the Misadventures of My Unmarried Midlife. Jane, 58, said that while her memoir celebrates the adventures, and men, she's experienced as a single adult woman, she always gets the same question at her book tour events: "Where can I go to meet men?"Jane always offers some advice (usually telling single women they can meet like-minded men volunteering for something they care about), but this is what she really wants to say:
STOP IT. Stop it right now — the sad-eyed, self-doubting, nail-chewing longing. Eau de desperation is a stinky fragrance, and men can smell it a mile away. And you're not even 40 yet! Get out there while you still can, sleep around, and enjoy that young body before nature's forces drag it south.
Jane wants the self-doubting unattached to remember that "being single is now a lifestyle" that women have perfected and learned to enjoy. Women should remember, she says, that the single life offers its own deep pleasures that a woman cannot enjoy while in a relationship. And so long as you actively maintain work ties, friendships, and get involved in your community, you can reap the rewards. Is Jane telling you something you already know?