Are you FREAKING CRAZY!!!??? I wish a b*tch would do all this in front of me to my HUSBAND!!! What the hell is wrong with you that you are still friends with this hooker? Even your mother notices? What else do you expect your husband to say...that she's hot and he gets with her every time he goes to "fix the computer"? Don't be so freaking NAIVE. Cuss this b*tch out and drop her immediately. How can you allow your "friend" to disrespect you like that? YOU tell this b*tch to stop calling your house and your husband. Don't leave that up to him. You should have cut ties long long ago. I can't believe anyone allows such behavior...feeding your man chips? I don't care what her sob story is there is no excuse. Don't you know many many many women lose their husbands to their best friends? You need to buy a clue.

See, now I don't see the point of not offending her. She's obviously offending you, and she doesn't seem to care. Don't invite her to your party this week, and tell her why. Tell her that your husband and yourself have become annoyed by her flirtatious behavior towards your husband, and until she straightens that out, she is no longer allowed at any function that ya'll host. Why allow yourself to be embarrassed in front of your family and friends because she doesn't know what appropriate boundaries are?

And, if you have already invited her, it should be really fun to make that call to UNINVITE her... Then, when all ya'lls friends ask why she isn't there, you can explain to them that she can't be trusted around your husband, and they shouldn't trust her either! Yay for ganging up on man stealing hooker wh*res!

Who cares about offending her. Any good girl friend knows not to impede on other women's territory. To disrespect that is a violation of a sacred unspoken law between females who are friends. Tell her to back off and tell her exactly why. Dont let her convince you that its your imagination, either.

Wow, I don't know if I'd be concerned about offending her because she CLEARLY isn't concerned about offending YOU. I'd take her off the guest list.

i agree with trixiefire. if she tries to make it look like you are the crazy one, remember this: YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR HUSBAND has noticed it and are annoyed by it. in other words you are NOT alone in thinking that she has crossed the line. you have your husband and mother behind you and that's the most important thing to know when going in to this battle.

if she does try to deny it, she is more than just having bad luck in men she has mental and emotional issue to think that her actions are acceptable.

i say tell her as you see it, anna. don't wait any longer, just tell her that her behavior towards your husband is not appropriate and DON'T WORRY ABOUT OFFENDING HER. SHE HAS ALREADY OFFENDED YOU MANY TIMES TOO!!!!!

Hotstuff said it best. Why on earth are you so concerned with sparing her feelings? She clearly doesn't give a crap about yours, or she's too self-involved to even notice. Her relationship problems are of her own making and no excuse for this kind of behavior, so stop cutting her so much slack. Stand up for yourself and your marriage and let her know in no uncertain terms that until she grows up and stops behaving like a desperate teenager she's not welcome around your family.

I as said before, your husband should handle it. You're aware of what's going on but it's happening to him, he needs to stop her, not you.

Um...she's not a "friend" obviously. You need to get rid of her ASAP. What a b*tch.

If she's purposely doing this, then I agree with the above comments -- you need to steer clear of her.
That said, I think it's best to try to have a rational discussion with her... only you know her and know the situation, but I have a couple of friends who a giant flirts and don't even realize that they are flirting. In fact, my fiance is like that -- he thinks he's just being friendly with someone in whom he doesn't have a romantic interest, and people think he is flirting with them. When I approached the situation, he was really embarrassed and felt awful.
That said, he wasn't trying to feed chips to anyone, but maybe you just need a heart to heart to let her know how you feel. If she denies it or gets upset, then nix her as a friend. But if she really is a friend, she'll understand and change her behavior.
I'd just hate to see you alienate a friend if it is all harmless in her mind, and she would apologize and change her behavior after talking to her. Everyone above seems to automatically believe the worst in her, but maybe she is just oblivious to the fact that she is totally crossing the line. You have nothing to lose by at least talking to her rationally and calmly about the situation to see her response.

Um . . . why the heck has your husband not said something already? He should have told her to knock it the heck off a long time back. He says he is annoyed by it - but why has he not spoken up then? Seems like he might be enjoying it more than he is letting on.

And I would drop that "friend" like a bad habit.

You and your husband should have a chat with her together. If you and your husband are both talking to her, you'll both be able to pull examples, and if your husband tells her how uncomfortable it makes him, hopefully she'll see that her "innocent flirting" doesn't seem innocent to either of you.

I feel bad for going with hotstuff on this one, but I would be infuriated if any "Friend" of mine did that to me. I use the word friend lightly because I truly don't think she has your best intentions at heart. It's also true that the amount of men that cheat on their wives/girlfriends with their best friends is ridiculous.

The husband probably hasn't said anything because most men enjoy the attention.

Hey, I think it is really simple and it does not need to be blown out of proportion like this. Firstly, if she is that desperate then invite a single guy friend over to the Christmas party who will keep her busy. Secondly, your husband can be the one who brings it up to her, and that way you would not need to go through the "awkward" conversation that nothing is going on. If it still persists, then you have a problem and then you need to set her straight. As for now, she probably does not even realize she is doing it because she is so lonely and desperate. Good Luck

have your mother say something.

Break-up with her as a friend. She's violated a major boundary. A deal breaker, in my opinion. Also, she annoys your husband, and makes him uncomfortable. That's more than enough reason to drop her.

Make sure you and your husband are a united front on this. Then get rid of this hooker.

Why haven't you kicked her @ss?

It's unfortunate that your friend is putting her need for attention before the friendship between you. You need to take action and be very clear about what you want her to understand. You confronting her might put her on the defensive, yet she needs to know how she is affecting you. I would recommend that you and your husband describe her attitude and explain the terms in which you want her to change. Be careful though, because she might feel that there is two against one. If she's true friend, she'll understand and agree to change her behavior. Otherwise, have a happy holiday without her and start the new year with a new friend!

I agree with Mortar. If you've been friends with for awhile and she's never came on to your husband before then she probably is just looking for attention. Invite a single guy and have your husband discuss this with her. No need to end a friendship because a friend has been blind of her offensive actions. You never know when you might need her for a favor!

Don't let her play the victim here either. One of my friends (we're not so close anymore) that I've had for years is "naturally flirty" and has "no idea" what she's doing. Apparently she is just like that around guys, whether she has a boyfriend or not, and really, it's not her fault. Of course, she started dating my boyfriend, and I was convinced that it just happened...this was in high school, so I'm over it, but even today she is living in denial about her behavior.

In your friend's case, the behavior is sudden, so there should be no way she can deny it, but I would not be surprised if she tells you you're overreacting. You're not. Losing a high school boyfriend is one thing, losing a husband is obviously a million times worse! Talk to her about it before the party, and no matter WHAT do not let her convince you that she isn't doing anything different or wrong. If she apologizes, fine, let her come, work on repairing your friendship, and keep an eye on her around your husband from now on!

Situations like this make me sooooo mad...
I've just found myself in situation very much like this and it's really annoying when a so-called friend is relentless w/ making moves on my bf.
It is DISRESPECTFUL...some people just have no shame.

What did i do?
I cut her off...plain and simple.

=oi

Check Your MAN girl. I think something is a little fishy, and it's not your friend.

If he was annoyed, trust me, HE would do something about it.

But he hasn't. and He's going over her house to "fix her computer" ????

Ha!, he's gone for a few hours when he does this, right?

Hmm . . sounds like someone is shnoo-buggyin' , and you're the last to notice!

You sound like you're always the "victim" too, Because i AIN'T never heard of a woman feeding another woman's husband chips in her face, and lived to tell about it . . .not even Jerry Springer rejects are that naive.

Check your husband! Sniff the balls . . .

my next door nieghbor flirts with my husband and i know if the timing was right and enough booze was flowing she'd f&#@! my man althou she tells me other wise she has no morals i dont trust her as far as i could throw her but i do trust my man but we all know what happens when there is to much alchol involved

I think I kind of understand why he doesn't say anything to her. First off, it's his wife's FRIEND (BFF too!), so he wouldn't want to break off their friendship unless she's ready to do so and according to this post, she's NOT ready to break off any friendship.

Secondly, if you SUSPECT someone's flirting with you and you don't like it, how would YOU approach that person? "HEY. STOP FLIRTING WITH ME." And what if she actually wasn't flirting and was just feeling extra grateful for his help (IF, but that's also a possibility). Isn't that going to be really weird/awkward later on? I know if some guy whom I have no interest tell me to back off just because I was being friendly, I'd BACK OFF. WAY OFF.

I know I've replied to your original message, ms. poster, but I think I'd put in my .2 cents. Again.
I agree that you need to find another guy to distract her ASAP. But if she doesn't cool it, yes, girl, you NEED TO TALK to her. Or at least get someone else to clue her in that she seems to have a crush on your hubby.

Good luck.

I agree with everyone, and I wish you all were my real life mates! Excellent advice here!

I agree with everyone this woman is not your "friend" she is trying to steal your husband right in front of your very eyes and you still consider inviting her to your party? cut all ties with her A.S.A.P!!IF YOU DON'T WANT YOUR MARRIAGE TO FAIL!!! YOUR "FRIEND IS A BACKSTABING SKANK"

I wouldn't have considered her my friend. If she is trying to get at your husband I'm pretty sure you let her go after your boyfriends!

If she was one of my friends... I know I wouldn't second guess them because they know not to do that... no matter how lonely and desperate you can be. I'm sure I would have to take off my earings and pull my hair up.

No matter who she is in your life she needs to respect you and your family.

Wasn't this posted only a couple of days ago?

don't delegate this to your mother or your husband - nip it in the bud. pull her aside and tell her to back the heck off and that it will end your friendship if she doesn't.

She is not your friend. Just uninvite her to your party and tell her why.

i don't know about this. i too have a boyfriend that when things like this happens.. he feels if he says something that it will fuel the fire and make the girl or whomever more likely to continue. i think that you should say something to your friend in a joking manner that will hit her like a ton of bricks. i would say we gotta find you a man so i don't have to share my husband anymore! like joke around. say something that will catch her off guard but don't take it too seriously. are you sure that your husband is not responding to her or ANYTHING? i can't see how a woman would do something like this. maybe she just feels really comfortable with you guys! whatever the case is.. i would DEF think about your plan before sitting her down and attacking her with the info. i would try to say something jokingly and i think she will get the hint and cool off. just my thoughts tho!!

Nip this one in the bud and call her on her behavior fast. And don't worry about 'offending' her, because she isn't worrying about offending you.

Omg that is soo annoying. Tell her to knock that crap off.

hahaha some of these responses are funny (and totally appropriate). doll, i vote go with Marci, and i vote to go with the ladies who say disinvite her to the party. call her up and say "i'm going to have to request that you don't attend our christmas party because you've been acting completely inappropriately towards my husband. i tried to let it go because you haven't been having luck with guys, but the feeding him chips incident was over the line."
and get off the phone. if people ask why she's not there, simply say "she couldn't make it" and change the subject. good god.

I agree that this woman isn't concerned about offending you in the least so being worried about offending her shouldn't be the highest priority for you. Your man might be annoyed by her attention since it bothers you but I would also bet he's a bit flattered by it as well.

The absolute best way to nip this in the bud is to end the friendship with her. She has crossed a line. If you can't bring yourself to end the friendship I'd say meet her for lunch prior to the party with examples in hand and let her have it with a no nonsense "I'm not kidding about this BACK OFF OF MY HUSBAND" approach and tell her you will not put up with it any longer. If you appear wishy washy or are willing to back away from your examples it will never stop. And in the long run, if she can't stop herself from flirting with your husband you don't want her around anymore because all it adds is stress to your life to be around her.

Uh, why are you still friends with her? I had a friend who liked to flaunt her breast implants in my husbands face and I completely cut that crap out. Don't let her do that to you and your husband. It makes your husband look cheap for allowing her to do this stuff when he's married to you and it makes you look weak for not standing up to her.

If shome skank was feeding my husband chips believe me she would have ended up with broken fingers! Why did you put up with that? get rid of her.

She said he fixed the computer at their house not the friends house, i noticed people made comments about him going to the friends house.

I think that this is more complicated than simply breaking it off with your friend. She's lost and stupid about men. Something similar happened with one of my friends and my husband...she didn't have a boyfriend and wanted what I had with my husband. Granted, she should've tried to find it with someone else, but flirted with my husband anyway. He was flattered b/c he really doesn't have women flirt with him, but nothing ever came of it. She found a boyfriend and everything was fine.

Don't let yourself look like a fool in front of her by allowing her to flirt with your hubby at your party, but don't let her alone with him either!!!

I really don't think that she's trying to move in on him. She just feels comfortable with him and likes to feel good about herself.

Your husband should tell her to quit it the first time she tries something at your party...

Holy sh*t are you kidding me? Why do you let this happen? You should have nipped it in the bud a long time ago. She apparently has zero respect for you... I am mad for you. I don't even think you should be nice about it.

My boyfriend's brother's gf (whew) is like this to all the men in his family...but not because she wants them but because she wants them to want her. Confidence issues I think, but either way, she would sit in my bf's lap or his dad's lap. She would joke about her boobs that were pushed up painfully high. And just cock tease all the men. My boyfriend was a good boy though and made a point to avoid her and even call her out. And pay her absolutely no attention at all and she eventually got the hint and chilled out. Plus I made a few b*tchy comments here and there.

Maybe your friend is single because she is attracted to married men.
And because she is a homewrecking slut.

my *friend* does this to me sometimes and I shut her down HARD. he called my phone once and she picked up my phone while I was in the ladies room and DAMN! When I heard he giggly and in her flirty voice, I grabbed the phone out her hand, told my bf I'd call him back and flat out said "you dont answer my bf's calls, got it? he's calling ME, not YOU. back off!"

obviously, sh*t led up to this explosion, but she got it and doesn't say peep about my man. My bf doesn't go along with her at all and is disgusted by her hitting on him. She's a good person and we can get along when we hang out and talk, but she now knows that when it comes to my man, hands off pal! It's become a mutual thing. Don't let her push u around by hitting on ur guy.

ok I just read the header to this blog and all I have to see it. Beat that beetch with a bat. There is no way on earth I would let my "friend" flirt with my husbnd, I would call her out on in front of everyone and put that beetch in her place quick. That is beyond wrong and I would make her feel like the slut she is.

The end! Now go tell her about herself!

While i totally agree you need to drop this girl you need to question your hubby too! Not that i think anything is goin gon but WHY is he letting this b*tch FEED HIM?!?! If he is so annoyed why didnt he tell her to stop, or walk away or laugh at her or say "my wife is the onlyone who hand feed me lady!" ???

Uninvite her. Tell her that her behavior is totally unaceptable and then tell your husband to grow a backbone so you dont have to fight his battles for him.

This girl is NOT your friend. Let her know how you feel and walk away! Scandalous. If I saw someone feeding my man chips, she'd better hope she was wearing running shoes!

What?! Who cares about her feelings? Call the ho out.

She is no friend to you. Immediately cut her out of your circle.

Honestly, i have NO idea why you're even remotely worried about HER feelings, or why you should be worried about getting HER a man. I don't care what her excuse is, this is simply ridiculous.

And as for your husband, its not that he should be rude to her but honestly in the chips incident or any type of OBVIOUS flirting... my guy would probably say something like "Oh no... my love will whip me if i allow someone else to feed me" and laugh it off... just so that she knows that he KNOWS she's being flirtatious and that he is not interested.

And just let me add this... my boyfriend and i have had to deal with flirting from other people a lot during the last 3 years but the basic rules (they work) are as follows:
1. If someone flirts with me... its MY obligation to stop it...
2. If i don't think I can stop it... or after several attempts he won't stop... I MUST tell him to help me out (even if it implies talking, arguing or even punching... in a guy's case)
3. Honesty is key.
And this works both ways.
Make sure he tells you if there have been other attempts so that when you approach her you have a good case.

Stupid catty behavior towards a friend's boyfriend is bad enough, but towards a HUSBAND???? Come on! How old is this chick?
Un-invite her to the party and have a serious talk with her.

She might be desperate for male attention but it does not giver her the rite to hit on your husband. If she is doing this she does not sound like a very good friend. You need to tell her as politely as possible to stop. If she does not get the point then you need to drop her. Plus if she makes you think you are making it all up in your head then she is trying to divert the blame. Trust your instincts! Women know how to pick up on these things especially when it comes to our husbands!

A friend of mine tried to charm my ex-bf and i understand where you are coming from. When some beeyat*h tries to do that.. it means she is jealous and insecure..ABOUT YOUR LIFE. She wishes you are her and wants what you have!

I think you are too naive and kind to let that happen to you. What i did was, i confronted her and my ex to hear both sides of the story and i left her feeling really devastated with my sharp words and how shameless she is to destruct our friendship.

I am still friends with her, but she knows i would never treat her the same way i did, she still feel bad about it.