Dear Sugar,

I don't know what to do. All of my friends have boyfriends and they are
happy. I have the worst luck with dating immature guys and always end up getting hurt. I'm really lonely and depressed. Sometimes I think I'm alone because I'm fat. I have problems with weight, and I've tried so many diets but nothing helps. My sadness is affecting my whole life. What can I do?

—Down in the Dumps Dora

To see Dear Sugar's answer

Dear Down in the Dumps Dora,

Just so you know, everyone has felt lonely and depressed about not having a boyfriend at some point in their life, so try not to compare yourself to your friends. I know it can feel awful to be single when all you want is to have someone to share love and life with, but try to have a little patience.

It sounds like there are some things you are unhappy with when it comes to yourself. Those issues will still be there, even if you have a boyfriend. You've got to love yourself before you'll be able to give love to someone else. I think you should take this opportunity to nurture your soul and figure out what needs to happen in your own life to make you happy. If you want to lose weight, then it's time to make some lifestyle changes involving a healthy diet and regular exercise (short-term diets don't work). Talk with your doctor or meet with a dietitian [1] and fitness trainer so you can get help setting achievable goals.

Remember that you hold the key to your own happiness and that you can't rely on someone else to make you feel good about yourself. If your feelings of depression become too overbearing to handle on your own, I suggest talking to a therapist. They can give you a nonjudgmental point of view and will be able to offer you some specific and constant advice. Hang in there, Dora. I'm a firm believer that there is someone out there for everyone and you'll meet that person when the time is right.

Source [2]