Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen are still denying reports of a romantic relationship even though they've supposedly been spotted all over New York sucking face! Now, if I were Ashley, there's no way I'd be able to keep mum about my relationship, but of course celebrity relationships are those of a different breed.
Their denial got me thinking about real life relationships. People keep new romances under wraps for all types of reasons, everything from getting back with an ex to dating someone else's cast aways, so ladies, tell me, have you ever had a secret lover?
Cyberjammies
Dolce & Gabbana
Theory
Nope! Why have one if you have to keep it secret? If you have to keep it secret then it isn't right.
1In a perfect world we'd like to think that one would never have to keep love a secret. But sometimes there are circumstances that prevent us from disclosing everything to everyone, and that's usually because we care about others and others care about us. I never thought I'd have to hide a relationship until I had to, for reasons that I feel are justified.
I have been with my boyfriend for five years, but a year and a half ago we broke up, what we both thought was for good. It was a painful break-up that my friends and family helped me get through. They saw my pain and typically (as people who love us) blame the ex as the cause of that pain even though the breakup was mutual. So, when my ex and I ran into each other six months after our "cold-turkey" break-up we couldn't fight that natural attraction to one another. We started going out for coffee, but coffee led to dinner and dinner led to our realizations of how right we are for each other.
We started to date again, but not officially. We were both scared to let our guards down and accept what felt so right. We have been together ever since and it has been the best year of our relationship. But the first six months was kept secret for a few reasons. First, we didn't want to jump into anything too fast, and without telling anyone we didn't feel pressure or judgment from friends or family. What's the point of telling everyone you're back together when you're not even sure if it will last? Second, when we were sure we wanted to be together, my friends and family put my boyfriend through hell before accepting him as a good person again, rather than the heart-breaker they once referred to him as. Going through this while we were still unsure might have put strain on our re-growing relationship, possibly interfering or swaying our feelings. Friends and family can have a lot of impact of your life, but it's only because they care and want what's best. Now, they are happy to see me so happy in my relationship and treat my boyfriend as one of the gang. I don't think my relationship would have turned out this way if we hadn't tested the waters first.
2If it isn't a serious relationship, then yeah it can be a lot of fun!
3It's fun to sneak around, as if you were having an affair! It adds an extra dimension of fun to the relationship!
4Umm no...
5I had one.
6But I only hid him from a lot of people because he was a bad choice for me and I was young and dumb
No.....I wouldn't be able to keep it a secret if i did have one.
7yeah but it wasnt very fun to be honest. if its something you are able to keep secret, then it clearly cant be as good as something you want to shout out!
8Yes. Years ago I continued a physical relationship with an ex boyfriend for several months after we had broken up. I couldn't tell anyone because he was so bad for me, I didn't want anyone to know. I kept it purely physical and totally secret. It was kin of hot even though he was a total trainwreck.
9I went out with a guy for 6-8 months that I didn't tell many people about. We had a fabulous physical chemistry and had a lot of fun together, but I knew it wasn't going anywhere permanent, so I just kept it in it's own little place in my life.
10Yeah, in college I started seeing my ex-boyfriend's friend a couple months after we broke up. We had to keep it secret so we wouldn't hurt my exes' feelings. It was just drama followed by more drama and the relationship just sort of died down when we left for summer break. (And by relationship, I mean regular hookup.)
I'm still friends with that ex and I told him about it like a year ago because I still felt guilty for hiding that from him. It turns out he knew about it anyway lol.
Also this one time I was hooking up with a guy who in all likelihood had a girlfriend who lived in another state. He claimed he broke up with her so that he could hook up with me (which was my condition) but I got the feeling that never really happened. Mainly because we had to keep the relationship a secret from his roommate. None of my friends met him either because he wasn't exactly the kind of guy I normally went for. It was a little weird.
11Yes it was short and sweet, we were co-workers and could not tell. It didn't last long and luckily he wasn't ready for a committment because then I wouldn't have gotten with my current boyfriend, who I love dearly.
12That's how my boyfriend and I started out! It was definitely thrilling and exciting...we still like to reminisce about those days.
13i had to keep it a secret and it was not right. it was a bad time but a great time. it got all sorted out. we have been together for 4 years or somthing like that. oh, and its not a secret anymore haha
14Yes I have.
15I have one right now
16I had to say Other, because yes I have been in a secret relationship, but it was FAR from a thrill. I was young (18) and had been going out with this JERK. We broke up and all my friends were happy, but then we got back together. I wouldn't tell my friends or family because I was ashamed (deep down I knew he was a complete A$$) and he didn't tell anyone because he was ashamed of me (he was LDS and I wasn't, and I was like his 'dirty little secret'). It went on for a couple of months like that before I finally realized why we were keeping things a secret, and I dumped him!
17Back when I was 16, I had a crush on this guy at school. We were always hanging out, going to movies, exhibits... etc - he really opened my world to more adult cultures, ideas and emotions. And soon... sexuality too. It was like being projected into a completely different dimension, filled with a thousand things I couldn't even fathom existed just a couple months before.
I don't know why we kept it a secret - except I guess it was part of the game? -, but it actually lasted for years and I did most of my sexual experimentation with him. We did some pretty insane stuff for teenagers... We're still friends, even though it's been many years since we last slept together. He's probably the most brilliant person I've ever met. And oh, the ton of memories! It's funny to see him now, and we're grown up, we live with our significant others, and we meet for coffee casually and never discuss our past. But we know what happened... and it's funny to wonder if he remembers as vividly as I do. But I'll never ask!
18Ashley Olsen probably isnt like most 21 year olds. She had a multi million dollar industry under her belt before she was 10.
I bet she and him are on the same maturity level. She can probably relate more to him than some other 21 year old frat kid.
19I have one right now as a matter of fact. No one knows about him.
20I'm in one now.... only b/c of the age difference btw us... I'm 18 he's 25..... so Idk how my parents would react... plus the way I met him is a lil shady....but hey we've been in this for nearly 9 months... so I can't say its a bad thing... Its just nerve wracking not to be able to be with him whenever I want... I sorta feel like a cheating wife at times... but its worth it!
21No, but I wish.
22When my boyfriend and I started going out, we just didn't mention it to anyone. I found the "Guess what guys? We're DATING!!!" approach somewhat awkward and wasn't certain my parents would approve. He wanted to see how long it would take people to figure it out. We decided to go with that.
23i did for a while, after i broke up with my first serious boyfriend when i was 19 and pretty rebellious. he was from my highschool and i would have been mortified if any of my friends knew about us, because of his weird past. it lasted a few months and no one found out. it was really thrilling, but i wouldn't do something like that again. i'm still afraid someday people will find out! i'll still be embarassed.
24I usually do this, not because of shame or anything, but just because I like to keep it to myself when something's just starting up. It's not something I keep a secret from everyone, and I don't lie about it-for example if someone asks if i'm seeing the guy, I will say I am- but I like to keep it just for me instead of sharing it with every single person I know. I feel like there's less pressure if it's just between me & him.
25I did, I was young
26Sort of... It was fun.
27I dated someone I worked with for a year and we kept it a secret from everyone at work. I can't believe no one figured it out!
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