Wow, Im the first one to vote. Awesome! For a second there I thought the 100% of the people agreed with me on "As long as he gave me a temp ring to tie me over, I would be okay with it". LMAO.

I actually picked out my ring beforehand My husband has great taste but he wanted me to be happy..so we talked about it but he waited for about a month before he actually proposed...so I was suprised about the timing. I love my ring!

My DH was stationed in Germany, and he proposed when he flew home to Oregon after ETSing in front of his entire family...banners welcoming home and all. The ring was a surprise, the event was a surprise, everything was a surprise!!! He knew me and what style I am , so he picked out the perfect ring for me on his own, and he knew that as long as he got me the best quality, the rest would speak for itself.

I wanted an iPod...

My husband had been listening everytime the subject of jewelry came up and picked me out a gorgeous ring.

I got the iPod with the money from the wedding

My boyfriend has amazing taste and knows what I like pretty well. I would trust in what he chose for me, and would rather be popped the question with a ring.

Although if he was THAT worried I could wait a few days to go together after he asks...

Ok unless you know hes financial unstable then no ring is ok...for the time being HOWEVER, if he can afford one then he BETTER have one when poppin' the question!

Yea, my fiance had one!

I've never really seen the point of proposing with an engagement ring. Marriage is a big decision, something that two people should talk about extensively before jumping into. If you have all these big talks, and you make the decision that you want to get married, and you're ready to, then aren't you engaged, ring or not? I thought engagement was the state of knowing that you're going to get married, not having a piece of jewelry on a specific finger. If my fiance had just shown up with a ring one day before we decided to get married, I would have scolded him for wasting money and for treating such an important decision like a game. I guess I'm not at all romantic. I mean, everybody should do what works for them. I'm not trying to judge. But a lot of things people do confuse me.

That being said, I found my engagement ring to be a great comfort during the year we were in grad school 800 miles apart. It was a tangible reminder of our connection, and that our separation was temporary. I wouldn't have cared if it was made of plastic, because it reminded me that he loved me enough to want to marry me, even if he couldn't just yet. And it also kept skeezy guys from hitting on me at the grocery store. Yay!

I dislike engagement rings. They're a sign of ownership--both partners wear bands, and that's enough for me. He can spend the money from a really amazing ring on something much better that we can both enjoy. I wouldn't turn down a ring if he was a gazillionaire, but I don't need one.

Well, to me, it's about spending my life with the guy and not about the ring. I *have* a ring, but I got it long after the proposal, and I really didn't care that much. My mother got her engagement ring on her 9th wedding anniversary because my Dad couldn't afford one when they wanted to get married.

my now dh didn't have a ring, we went and picked it out together over the next week (a few trips to decide which stone and which setting). there was an issue with the setting and so i didn't have my ring for 3 weeks. i remember finally telling him something like "the people i work with think i'm making this up! WHERE IS MY RING!" seems silly now, what's 3 weeks when you wear it forever

I got proposed to without a ring (this was befre I met my now fiance), and the guy had no intention of geting me a ring. It made me feel unimportant, and like being engaged wasn't special. I knew he was in debt with student loans, so it didn't have to be something that was really expensive or anything, but something wouls have been better than nothing. Of course that wasn't the only thing wrong, and we soon broke up after that.

In France it's really cheesy to propose with an engagement ring...Most of us would much rather shell out on a huge dinner party for all our friends to celebrate the future nuptials. Then and again, I must be a very unromantic person because the idea of having my parents pay thousands for my wedding is so appalling to me! Question to you Americans: is it very common to propose with a ring? And go on one knee to do so?

Um...honestly, I would have thought it was a little odd if my husband had proposed without a ring.

But he knew that I would love anything that came from him...I'm not one of "those girls". The fact that he took the time to pick out something that he thought I'd like is touching to me. And I would have loved it even if it was not at all what I would have picked for myself.

As it is, he did an amazing job...1.2 carat solitaire, Tiffany setting in white gold. It's perfect and I love it.

I want to be proposed to when the time is right, not after some elaborate scheme is thought up and a zillion carat ring is purchased.

I'd totally be fine w/o a ring. I want a really small ring anyway

I don't need the whole on one knee thing and what I want for a wedding ring doesn't include some huge rock on my finger. I would rather my wedding bands be special.

wow, i am shocked that there are others out there who feel the same way i do about a ring. my husband proposed to me without a ring and i was fine with it. i think that there are so many more important issues in a marriage than what type or size of ring a man gets.

We didn't even have a typical proposal...we were sitting around talking one day about when we would like to get married, and we picked a date then and there. He did go and buy me a ring, but we had already been engaged three weeks by the time I got it (and we only had a 2 1/2 month engagement). He asked my opinion and went and picked out the ring himself, but it's great and I love that it was a gift from him and that he picked out what he wanted it to look like using my input.

I wanted him to pick out the engagement ring, period. No input from me. That's how it happened. I wouldn't have cared if he didn't have the ring yet when he proposed, but I wouldn't have wanted to be in on picking it out. That just doesn't appeal to me at all.

The wedding rings, I wanted to pick together.

My brother was given a ring by my grandparents that has been passed down in the family, but he knew the setting would have to be changed because his girlfriend usually only wore white metals and the ring was in yellow gold. So instead of changing it before giving it to her, he just gave it to her as was and then they both went and picked out the new setting together. So I think that was a good way to go about it. Hers is now a set and his band is made of cobalt. They get married this Sunday!

My fiance proposed without a ring, which was fine, because I got to pick my own!

What does DH mean?

It's not that I wouldn't feel engaged, I just wanted the ring to be something HE picked out. Luckily, he was really dedicated and did a lot of research before he purchased. He got the most amazing stone! He also listened really well to what I wanted in a ring and designed it for me. The nice part was, he told me that if I want to change the setting, I can. I kept it this way because I feel that it's special since he picked it, but it's nice to know he wanted me to be happy.

I, too, dislike engagement rings. I'll never have one.

DH is darling/dear husband.

We were engaged without one because it wasn't planned.
I bought him a ring, which he wears on a necklace or as a ring. He bought a ring alternative, necklace and bracelet set, for me as I'm not into rings. However, for the ceremony I will have rings - engagement and double guard bands, which I will probably not wear after the ceremony. hehe. I mean, I know that I am a married woman and have nothing to prove or show anyone.

Frenchkiss,
It is very common to proprose with a ring in the U.S., The one knee thing, not so much, but their is a premium placed on how romantic or special the setting. Personally, I proposed and the setting wasn't at all romaantic other than for the two of us. I also prefer to just have a good celebration for my wedding - there will be no fluffy princess dress, tiara, or 900 tier cake. Just beaches, a slip dress, and some good traditional food. We're gonna have it in Ecuador during the summer (winter here) and hope none of the northerners faint from the shocking heat and humidity mid-vows, hahaha.

I wouldn't care if I didn't have a ring.

I don't like the idea of picking out my own ring, it would just make me feel uncomfortable; I'd prefer to have him pick it out. The ring isn't the point at all, but that wasn't the question that was asked =)

I've never been the type of woman who thought about my wedding beforehand or oohed and ahed over rings. When Peter and I began to talk about getting engaged the only criteria I had was that it be an antique ring because I wanted to absolutely avoid the possibility of my ring being set with a conflict diamond.

P asked me to look for rings I liked, and I've never had this experience ever with jewelry, but I walked into an antique store by myself one day and found the perfect ring—from the 1920s, "subtle yet imposing" as one friend described it. It fit perfectly, looked right (I'm not a jewelry type of girl), and felt right.

Peter went back and got it a few months later, but really, he could've asked me with a twist tie from a bag of bread and that would've been cool by me. I'm just happy to have him in my life. And the coolest part of the engagement was the setting (Redwoods) and the sincerity and nervousness from Peter, and the old couples who walked by and hugged and high-fived us afterwards. The ring was just a bonus.

Hmmm... It's refreshing to hear that there are so many others who are indifferent to rings. My husband and I don't wear them. We know we're married, what do we have to prove? But people treat us so strangely, like we have an ulterior motive. What I hate the most is when women treat me with pity because I don't have a diamond solitaire. Save your pity for the dismembered workers in the African conflict-fueling diamond mines!

It's okay to propose without a ring provided that you're in the middle of Tiffanys when he pops the question!

I want to be surprised, but I still would hope he knows what I like I'm not that picky anyway!!

I agree with rothchild. I was engaged without a ring. Years later after we were more financial stable my husband wanted to buy me a bigger and better ring but this ring is special and my love is not based on my ring size or my hubby's wallet so I would not let him get me one.

If he did have a ring I would rather it not be a diamond...I don't like them but it would mean more to me if he picked the ring even if he doesn't propose with one.

i personally think having the ring isnt the most important part- i think it'd be way more important for the ring to be "the one"- as in the real ring he wanted to be able to give me, instead of something he could scrap together just so id be superficially satisfied. maybe thats just because i feel that spontaneity is more romantic and heartfelt. in the end the latter would mean more to me. however i dont think people do that anymore, and i'd HATE to pick out my own ring.

i agree with most people here, that essentially it doesn't really matter. speaking from experience though, it was SO great that my fiance picked out the ring without me beforehand. even though i had a hunch it was coming, it preserved a little surprise since i hadn't actually seen him look at rings. and i love the boy, but he is a little lazy...yet he spent so much time looking for the perfect ring which was amazing in itself!! of course it's perfect, b/c of the thought & effort behind it...so i wouldn't have it any other way (or any other ring!)

I want to pick out my own ring. I actually DON'T want to be surprised with a marriage proposal, now that you mention it.

My husband gave me the most beautiful CUBIC ZIRCONA ring there ever was..LOL

He is an executive with Microsoft, we have money, but I told him when we were dating that I wasn't the type of girl who wanted to wear $15,000 to $30,000 on my finger. I was too active to be worrying about it falling off or me losing it..so when he proposed at the top of the Towers Of America in San Antonio TX during a vacation, I almost died when I saw this 14Karat Gold, BEAUTIFUL ring he slipped on my finger. The first thing out of his mouth after asking me to marry him was..Don't worry, it's a Cubic Zircona! LOL
I wrapped my arms around him and said
YES YES YES!

i never been married before and my b/f hasn't pop the big question yet, so i can only guess how i would feel if...
i think i would be very excited to be asked but, i will be very disappointed if he didn't give me a ring when his ask, so my vote was no i couldn't feel really engaged until i have a ring on my finger.

i absolutely want a ring when he proposes. i would love having a ring knowing that he went and picked it out on his own, taking into consideration what i like and don't like.

My husband had this whole elaborate, beautiful surprise and he proposed with a ring but honestly, if the truth be known ,it wouldn't have made the moment any less meaningful had there not been one at the time.Engagement rings ,like wedding bands are a symbol of love and committment and i have never, ever, once considered either one of my rings a sign of ownership.

My fiance had a temporary setting for the diamond - the diamond was a family heirloom (good thing, because we never would have been able to afford one that size otherwise!) but he knew I was picky and didn't want to pick the wrong setting. So he bought a temporary setting for $120 and then the jeweler gave us a credit when we took it in to the store to pick out a permanent setting. It was a nice compromise between the 'ring/no-ring' proposal debate.
- D

I'm glad my hubby proposed with a ring that he had picked out. I view it as a gift from him to me, so I wouldn't want it to be something I had chosen for myself. Plus, he knows me so well, he knew exactly what I would like.

My dad proposed to my mom twice. The first time she laughed and told him he was crazy bc they hadnt been together very long. She said yes the second time, we always joked that if he had REALLY wanted to show mom he was serious he should have had a ring ONE of the times he asked. They got one after they got engaged.

If it was a spur of the moment proposal, I wouldnt really have a problem with no ring, but I honestly wouldnt really feel engaged until I had one. My DH is really traditional though, so he went and talked to my dad, had a ring (we went ring shopping together) and got down on one knee- the whole nine yards.
After all (speaking from personal experience) when you tell people you are engaged, the eyes to straight to the hand.

I'm not sure -- I would definitely want a ring on my finger BUT I would want it to be the right one. I think window shopping before the proposal would be the ideal situation for me. Of course, my best friend already has pictures of my dream ring, so once the right guy comes along, I'm sure she'll point him in the right direction.

I think part of the whole proposal process is him going and taking the time to pick out the ring that he thinks I Want...as a suprise. I don't want any hand in picking out my ring. He has bought me jewelry before, and everything he has picked out is gorgeous, so I look forward to seeing what little piece of perfection he chooses to signal the beginning of us together as "committed".

I agree with cravinsugar.

I want to see what he picks out for me. There's something really special and romantic about him making that decision.

For me, it's about the marriage, not the ring. So THAT'S why I want him to pick it out, as opposed to the "ring of my dreams."

I picked out the ring because he knew it was important to me, there was no big surprise proposal or anything, and that's just the way I wanted it. Plain, simple, easy.

Well I made it easy for my guy... I had an exact replica of the ring I want.... (CZ of Course).... so alll is has to do is replace the silver with platinum and the CZ with Diamond and he's in! But Id rather him give me a temp ring... and then let me go pick out the one I LOVE>... But I like this TV proposal... On Girlfreinds.... Toni Childs' man gave her 4 options of rings.... and just keep pulling pulling out boxes while he was down on one knee...

I think it is important to give your boyfirend suggestions and discuss what it is that you would really love, for the rest of your life, but there is something about the romantic element of surprise that is so necessary.

Discuss the ring beforehand-- direct him to it, and then let him do the rest!