Dear Sugar
My fiancé and I recently got engaged, and I couldn't be happier. The one problem is, his mother hates me. I mean, absolutely hates me. His family is ultra-traditional and religious, and I have a daughter from a previous relationship (not a marriage). She thinks I'm a bad influence on her son, and she's begged him to break up with me several times in the past. We're all going to visit his family this week to share the news with them, and I'm a little scared of how she'll react. How can I get her to accept me? Hester Prynne

Dear Hester Prynne
Don't worry about making her happy. If she's got her mind made up about you already instead of trying to convince her to overlook your past, focus on the future. Until she settles into the idea of having your around forever, all you can really do is kill her with kindness and show her how much you love her son. Be patient with her until she's over the initial sting of the wedding news. Eventually she'll come around and realize how wrong she was about you - she'll also realize that hating you isn't going to help her relationship with her son. Here are a few helpful hints for you to consider as you drop the "till death do us part bomb"; dress nicely (err on the side of conservative and cover up), don't drink too much, listen to what she has to say and let your fiancé answer anything tricky. Lastly, be aware of your pda. A little is endearing but too much is distasteful.