In a funny and kind of sad essay, a writer on Salon discusses how sex with men who watch porn (or maybe she means too much porn) can sometimes make her feel like she's starring in a private porno against her will. The moves are too rehearsed, too cheesy, too porn-y. "It’s hard to feel fully in the moment," she writes, "when you’re thinking of what it would be like to watch it."
For some women, porn and its influence can make sex more varied and exciting, but for others, it may feel like their partners are just busting out moves they've seen in a porn film that do nothing at all for them. If you're sleeping with a man who is copying porn moves, what's the one you wish he'd stop doing?
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This isn't a move from a porn that men do, but I wish my partner would stop asking me to open my mouth and stick out my tongue like a porn star. I find it unattractive and demeaning and have said so.
1I once knew a guy who would sort of slap me with his penis during sex. I didn't get that at all.
2Thankfully I don't have that problem anymore. I did date a guy who always requested the 'moneyshot', and I'm so glad I never agreed to do something for someone who never cared about my own satisfaction.
From the article: "He did not have sex with me. He had sex on me."
3That was him exactly.
The tongue flick when they're going down on you. First off, they look like snakes, which is only marginally sexy. Secondly, they barely touch the goods. Lick, boys, don't flick.
4Jerking off above/among/between/on my ass. I'm sorry, is this supposed to do anything for me?
5All of them. As soon as I lose the feeling of connection to my partner and I start feeling like a piece of meat that the guy isn't even thinking of as a person, then of course I'm just totally turned off and that's the end of it. I HATE porn. Really, I do. Not judging anyone else, but personally, I hate it. 99.9% of porn is only about the guy getting off, nothing in porn is ever about making the woman feel good or get off. It's so degrading. And the fact that guys do sometimes bring that to the real world is super not cool.
6Agree about the tongue flick. Go down properly guys, stay there until the job is done and don't think because we are not making daft loud noises we are not having a good time. Don't expect us in bed in high heels either!
7It's a dominance thing. Also, does eating you out do anything for us? Sex is give and take.
8IMO- I love thinking I am in a porno when having sex. I have asked my boyfriend to play along but he says it's fake, cheesey, and too much of a cliche. I think it is kinda hot.
9I agree with gawj but I never tell my bf. and I actually like watching porn. well not religiously but everynow and then I like watching. My bf doesn't really do anything to me that I haven't done before and besides I am very open about sexuality. so its all good.
10Wanting to jerk off anywhere on me. It's demeaning and gross, does nothing for me, and if that crap gets in your eyes it hurts like hell. Also, any version of the jackhammer sex that always seems to "work" in pornos. Not cool.
11Lol, the comments were funny to read. Thank God my bf doesn't try to do anything that even remotely resembles a porn move. Well, except for the time he threw my legs over his shoulders. The look of discomfort on my face quickly put an end to that. I have had guys in the past do the jackhammer pounding technique as well as ask me where I want them to cum. Uhm hello? It's not sexy for you to pull it out and hose me down after you just beat the crap out of my lady parts. Keep your mess to yourself.
12LOL tlsgirl, Hiding55! Yeah, my boyfriend is baffled why I don't enjoy being used as a cum rag, pardon the expression! It's sticky and messy and frankly it's your mess, not mine!
13And it's not really a move guys do, but expecting us to make scream and moan like they do in pornos is annoying. I mean really it's so ridiculous!
I have already commented here, so excuse me having a second bit of the cherry as it were! I think the last 3 posts are so spot on; porn has a lot to answer for!
Maybe we need some more genuinely educational videos to show how to really pleasure a woman. The industry could also act more responsibly by demonstrating that condoms are cool.
14I hate how they want to to cum on your tits. It's gross.
15Muirnea I'm with you. I really hate porn becase it gives men unrealistic expectations of women. I mean, I'm not a porn starlet, I'm not going to act like I'm on camera when we're alone.
I really really really really hate being asked if I want to take a facial. Getting spunk in my eyes once was enough. That stuffs like battery acid.
16I think a little porn can be fun every now and then in little amounts. If every time we have sex I feel like there should be a camera crew in the room with us... um.....eww.
17If it's a guy I actually like, I really don't mind being cum on, it's something I've told guys they're welcome to do provided it's not ruining any other mood (Like I'm almost there, and he pulls out to cum on me. Not cool) but for like a boob job, it's fine, I actually kinda like it.
Also, I do scream and moan like a porn star when the sex is good. And this isn't actually because I think that everyone does it. I was really surprised the first time, as I always figured I'd be really quiet.
That being said, if porn bothers me in any way, it's that I feel guys I'm not close to feel like they can ask things of me that they really have no right to ask. And then they get pissy when I say no.
18I like to dress up a little or play games but i HATE it when a guy tells me what to do like a command. You can tell if I guy watches too much porn if he wants you to say stupid things like "call me big daddy" or watch in the mirror. Too much of that is such a turn off.
19in the beginning, we used to make out in a room adjacent to which his other roomies would sleep. so it embarrassed me to make any sounds. since then it is pretty impossible for me to deliberately make sounds when it just doesn't come to me. and he always says that he wants me to moan or such orgy sounds like that.
20he also slaps on my butt when we r in th middle of the doggie shot. it is a turn off for me. what fun is there in hitting? aren't ur nail pricks enough painful already. maybe i m too sophisticated in my sex life as well. but i allow all this just for his satisfaction..
My ex watched porn all the time..until he started dating me. I made sure he didn't need it.
21I guess I'm weird if I like it when a guy cums on me. Their reaction turns me on...When my ex & I got really into it, it felt like I was in a porno. He liked if I acted like a porn star, it turned him on more knowing that his gf could do that. I told him he could come anywhere as long as he didn't hit me in the eye, & of course he did..
I love being treated like a nasty slut. Cumming on my face or in me somewhere is sexually exciting. I like feeling the goo hang off my chin.
22the classic lick his fingers before he touches the clitoris...looks you in the eye, smiles, and then licks the thumb and forefinger. Like he's teasing me. I hate it. Comes right out of a porn. And the tilt the head back with his top teeth biting his lower lip...it looks so fake. I enjoy when he loses control and I can tell when he doesn't completely. Plus all of the other comments...hate the cum on the breasts thing...the smell of cum makes me want to vomit anyway.
23If you like a man cummin on your face than possibly you like feeling dominated or inferior cos as much as I enjoy sex, all the moves and noises attached I really wouldnt want him to cum on my face. other areas maybe but my face just seems do degrading. I had 1 guy that used to pull my hair and slap me durin doggy style. another kept tryin to push my head so his dick went right down my throat when I gave him bj - listen, I dont wanna choke on it *sshole! I let go to enjoy it but thinking about it, sex just shouldnt be like that. Not quite sure thats how God intended..
24Guys just don't get it sometimes!
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