Forgivable. You definitely put your foot in your mouth, and it was a little insensitive since she JUST lost the dog but you were sincerely trying to help. It doesn't help that you are not a pet person.

People are irrational after the loss of a loved one. Even with a beloved pet people need time to grieve. Perhaps she felt that getting another animal so soon would take away from all that she had shared with the old dog. When my cat died at the age of 14, I was 6 years old when I got him, I never wanted another animal. A couple months later I got a new kitten. Healing takes time. Animal or not.

Next time I would suggest waiting a few more weeks before suggesting to someone who's lost a pet that they get a new one.

your heart was in the right place even if the words weren't. Your sister will come around when the initial pain dies down...good luck

Forgiveable. Losing a dear pet is just like losing a member of the family, so it would be a little tough for someone that doesn't have a pet to understand that. And in no means am I bashing you for not being a pet person.

All in all, your intentions were good. You were only trying to help. So I suggest sending her a card with your apologies and perhaps even a bouquet of flowers. Just let her know that you were only trying to make her feel better, and you didn't mean to bring something like getting another dog up so soon.

And maybe when she does decide to get another pet, you can go with her to help her pick it out? I think that would be sweet, when the time is right.

I think you should just give her some time to mourn her pet. Don't try to console her about it anymore, it'll just hurt her more. Just wait it out, she'll come around when she feels better

I agree with D Ford.

I think, while your comment was perceived as insensitive by your sister, it is obvious that you were only trying to help.

We all grieve differently and have different needs when we are in pain. I'm sure, with a little time, that your sister will see that you meant no harm.

100% FORGIVABLE! You didn't mean to come across as nasty or even insensetive.. it sounds like you were nervous, and trying to make her feel better so you just suggested that...
She's probably just really upset right now, but she'll soon realize you were just trying to be nice.. Seriously, you don't have very much to feel guilty about. You actually CALLED her to tell her you were sorry!! You sound like a good, caring sister.

At least you didn't laugh. I've laughed at things like this because I get so nervous and uncomfortable. Trust me, this does not go over well.

I think the loss of a pet is something only the owner really gets, because to everyone else it's just...a pet. Honestly, your sister is overreacting if she won't talk to you. Yeah, a pet is just LIKE family, but you ARE family and you didn't mean anything by it. Apologize and let her get over it. Totally forgiveable.

FORGIVE!! what you said was actually very nice!! although she could never replace her dog getting a new one will make it better. Its not like you told her to go get one right away. Just call and apologize.

You were just trying to help. You can't really blame her for overreacting because she'd just been through something pretty traumatic for her, but I'm sure in time she will realize that your heart was in the right place and forgive you. I guess you'll just have to wait around until that happens.

I work at an Animal Shelter, we see people every day who have lost a dear family pet and are here the next day, or the week after looking for a new family member. Some folks can't fathom it for months and years after. It may have been something she perceived as insensitive, but you can't ever tell what someone wants or doesn't want to hear in this situation. It is completely forgivable what you said. Your heart was in the right place, and that's what should count in the long run.

forgive! i don't have any pets, so i wouldn't have known what to say in the situation either. she is probably very sensitive to the situation now and didn't see your comment as help. i don't think you were wrong.

I am completely undecided on this. Your best bet if you don't know what to say than maybe you shouldn't say it. If something happened to my dog Cuba I would be really upset if anyone including family called and suggested I get a new dog within a few days of him being put down. I don't necessarily think you were insensitive, you just didn't think before you spoke.

since your not an animal person i vote forgive..you meant well..but it came out wrong..my dog is litterally like my child..if i lost her i would be devastated...i wouldnt want someone tellin me just to get a new one...because to me that is just saying that an animal didnt mean anything to me...but people are different

Your sis is just looking to be angry with someone, and unfortunately, you gave her the opportunity. Give her some time, send her an apologetic note, and she should forgive you eventually.

It's always so difficult to speak about matters so strong, as death... your sister is very sensitive right now, and I'm sure she will understand and forgive you... don't worry!!!

As forgivable as anything ever was. Your heart was in the right place, but your sister is in pain and is looking to lash out at anyone and everyone right now. Don't expect her to be rational. Yes, you should have waited to suggest getting a new dog, but you only wanted help. Give her a week or two, then call to apologize and explain you only wanted to fill the hole in her heart. That should do it.

forgive, and since your heart was in the right place and you weren't suggesting she replace the dog that died, but rather that a new pet might bring them joy i thing she was really mean to be so upset with you.

i honestly don't get why people think that because they are upset they have a pass for poor behavior. yes her dog died, but you called to be kind, to offer support, to tell her you were thinking about them and she hung up the phone on you. i hope she's holding it together better for her daughter than she did for you.

she needs to get over being upset at you and get on with the real issue, which is grieving the loss of her pet. and if i were you and she brought it up again i would tell her just that and then move on. something like "i know you are missing brownie but your comments are uncalled for. my intent was to offer support for your loss, clearly you took it in another way and i'm not sure why that was. perhaps when you are through the grieving process we can revisit the issue. so tell me, how is (niece) enjoying the cooler days"

Totally forgivable. I know exactly what your sister is going through, but she is overreacting. However, just keep in mind that she is in the middle of her grief & it's not easy to make good judgment....just like you didn't intend to stick your foot in your mouth.

We lost our dog (She was our only BABY.) a year ago & we are still not ready for a new puppy. I'll tell you, a lot of people are quick to suggest you immediately get a new dog, even the people who are big time pet lovers. So don't sweat it too much.

I would just send her a sympathy card & a simple note that says you're sorry for being insensitive & that it was truly not your intent to suggest their dog was so easily replaceable, but more of a way to help them cope. Tell her you'll be there for her when she calls. If she still holds a grudge, it's her problem.

Try not to beat yourself up over it.

forgive. you had no intention of hurting your sister.

Forgive, you weren't being mean she is very sensitive right now. Give her time.

Definetly forgive. It was an accident.

she just upset needing to be angry

Forgiveable. It's hard for a person to think about getting another dog while they're mourning the loss of their beloved pet. However, it does seem to be a good option for young children. You teach them to mourn the loss and respect the life and good times that you've had with the pet, then when it's comfortable for the parent, you bring in a new animal to continue the happiness that having a pet brings to the family.

It's forgivable. All you have to do is to apologize.

So forgivable! You meant well, it was just horrible timing. Tell her your sorry and that you didn't mean to be insensitive. It was a good idea however you shouldn't say it right after the death; wait a month or two.

That's a little ridiculous. I have 3 dogs and no children. I understand her being upset maybe you've been insensitive about animals before, but to get angry and hang up on you, then not talk to you. She sounds like a drama queen. A simple its too soon would have sufficed. I would just let her chill for a bit.

forgive, but you need to sincerely apologize in detail, and don't be such a dumbass again.

Forgive. You were trying to make her feel better.
Send her a note or something and tell her that you didn't mean to imply that pets are that easily replaced and you were just trying to be there for her.

Completely forgivable. No one ever really knows what to say at times like these, and as a result, we sometimes say the wrong thing with the best of intentions. Just call her and tell her how bad you feel. She might even realize her reaction was a little harsh.

Forgive Forgive. A lot of people, including myself, are horrible at figuring out what to say at someone's loss. I get all awkward because bottom line is that I DON'T know what the person is going through. I have never had a parent pass nor a pet pass nor a spouse pass...so to try to console and give solice to another is just odd for me because I am so afraid of putting my foot in my mouth. The important thing you have to remember is that your heart was in the right place and you said what you said with NO ILL INTENT. You thought you were saying something helpful.

Let a few days pass and let her grieve in her own way, then talk to her and tell her that you love her and you didn't mean to upset her--that was the last thing you wanted to do. She should understand, if not right away, then surely after a little bit of time has passed and the trauma has worn off.

your friend should come around soon. i am a dog lover too, and can never bear the thought of her leaving or even replacing her, but well - not everyone shares the same kind of bond. you have no bad intentions, i hope your friend will get over it and talk to you soon.

Totally forgive.

Forgive. You did your best and we all sometimes say the wrong thing at the wrong time. What matters is that your intentions were good. Send your sister a card and perhaps some flowers to let her know that you were not trying to be hurtful and I'm sure that she will forgive you sooner than later.

Forgive. I don't think it was the BEST thing for you to say right after she suddenly lost her dog, but I think she was just too upset and took it the wrong way. I would call her back and tell her how sorry you are. We all say things at the moment that we didn't mean to.

seriously who voted to not forgive?? This is TOTALLY forgivable and the sister is probably just really sad and snappy.

as an obsessed pet owner, i can totally understand how she feels, my dog is like my child, raising him, waking up 4 times a night to bring him out, all that stuff... i cant imagine how attached i will be when he is 2. i say dont worry, she will come around, its really just the innitial shock, she is taking out her anger on you. just give her a bit of time and everything will be fine!

I, too have been an obsessed pet owner. My precious cock-a-poo died two years ago. I still haven't been able to get another pet. I loved this dog as if she were my child. My then-pregnant sister suggested that I have her put down, because my dog was having trouble getting around due to old age. It took me a while to forgive her. I told her that her request was similar to me requesting that she have an abortion. I realize now how harsh that was at the time, but that's how much I loved my pooch. She'll forgive you eventually.

your heart was in the right place but replacing a loved puppy is like replacing a child after they are lost it takes time to realize they must go on and not live in the moment best thing is be patient she will come around just remember to be availble and be a good listen

Definitely forgive...... I believe your heart was in the right place and not being a huge animal lover it's sometimes hard to understand how attached we animal lovers are to our pets. IMO you did nothing wrong except to make a suggestion you thought would help.We are all guilty of that at one time or another.Give her a call,tell her you are sorry and give her time to heal. Good Luck!

I'm not an animal person either, so if I wasn't thinking I might've said that too. forgive, definitely. now you know what not to say, and it's your sister, they have to cool off and talk to you again eventually.