We've all been there — on a plane, at the store, trying to watch a movie, and the screeching, wailing or whining begins. I always feel for the parents of children who, in public, are causing a big ruckus. It's annoying enough, I imagine, but then having strangers either glare or silently seethe must be tough. You'd probably either never want to leave the house again or you'd become militant about your rights as a parent to be out and about, annoyed strangers be damned! (Check out the hilarious video above and watch until the end — she admits the kid, though annoying, is cute!)
One crazy old dude took matters into his own hands on Monday by slapping a stranger's crying toddler at Walmart. Uh, wow. Hopefully, most of us are not cruel (or crazy) enough to do something like this, but how do you handle a situation when a baby, toddler or child is making a fuss? The child's age and the parent's reaction probably make a huge difference.
Miriam Ocariz
Cheap Monday
Phi
I've noticed you're picking up stuff from dlisted lately...
1I can't stand screaming kids in public but I try my best to ignore them instead of causing an even bigger scene. I have made comments to the people am I with about how I would never let my child carry on like that in public just loud enough that the parents hear me. I however don't have any children so I have no idea what it's like to keep them under control. I can't stand when parents let their small children run around the restaurant when I am trying to enjoy my meal. It's not a playground and the restaurant employees are not babysitters. I saw a funny sign at a restaurant once: Unattended children will be rounded up and sold.
2If it's a little baby they can't do anything about, then I just put on headphones if I have them! But if it's a movie or something, I would ask them to leave; this has happened before. And if the kid is old enough to know better, I sometimes just say something to the kid, like "That wasn't very nice" or whatever.
3Airplanes are a parent's nightmare — you can't remove your child from the situation. I usually smile at the frustrated mom or dad and offer their kid a toy or something to distract them. No matter how much a parent plans, babies can be unpredictable and it's the worst feeling when it's your youngster that has a meltdown.
4I glare pointedly at the parent and get all huffy in the hopes that my passive-aggressive signs of displeasure will cause the child to shut the heck up. The sound of babies crying honestly stresses me out more than almost any other sound on earth. And in planes, or on buses, etc., don't try the discipline. Give the thing whatever it wants to make it quiet.
5If you don't like crying children, don't take public transportation, including airplanes.
It's harder to be a parent with a crying child than it is to be an easy a**hole getting pissy over things parents can't always immediately remedy.
6I have a basic rule of thumb: crying babies are like smokers. Anywhere a person is free to smoke, babies are free to cry. That means no restaurants, no buses, not in libraries or churches... you get my drift. People go on about smokers and how disrespectful they are of other people's health and comfort - the sound of constant wailing can raise blood pressures and induce stress in people within a five-metre radius. That's as bad as passive smoking.
7and i'm not a smoker.
8Excluding older children with parents who have spoiled them and are letting them run around screaming, young children cry for a very specific reason, frustration. The frustration could be from a million zillion different things but they don't have the verbal or mental capacity to deal with it on a rational scale like an adult. If you can't understand that, you need to remove yourself from the situation, or stick some headphones on and ignore it. They ARE people too, and you can't just smack them around to make them shut up and there are no miracle cures. The kids who are spoiled and obnoxious prove that, you can't just hand them whatever they want to keep them quiet. Every single kid no matter how well behaved, espeacially as a young baby or toddler, is going to have a meltdown or cry a little, and to insinuate that anyone with children should avoid public places is about the most ignorant and intolerant thing i have ever heard. What makes you think that your snide comment about controlling kids who are upset is any less obnoxious then listening to someone cry? It's not, and being an adult that can rationalize and understand the situation should give you the ability to deal with it.
9I can handle it almost everywhere except for the movies! I don't get parents who bring babies with them. It drives me crazy.
Usually I'll do something completely immature on the subway like stick my tongue out at the baby and it usually works. They laugh.
10I'm not unrealistic, I have 6 nieces and nephews, plus 1 on the way... it's impossible to keep them quiet everywhere. I have no problems with the occasional crying child, I do have a problem with the parents who ignore their kids in public and let them carry on. If I ever have children in the future, I will not take them on a plane without the proper entertainment, I will NOT let them cry or run around at a restaurant (they will go straight outside or to the bathroom), etc. I was a waitress for 2 1/2 years, I saw parents let their kids drawn on our walls and tables, run around the other waitresses carrying hot trays, bothering the other customers, and everything else imaginable. Only a handful of parents have actually taken their kids outside to have a talk or get punished, we need more of that.
11Anon, I like your idea. But I work in a cafe and just about every wekk there is one Wailer. Most kids we get in are little Gems. Perfect angels. But theres always one that howls because he or she doesn't like chicken.
Usually I just ignore it, or ask the parent if theres anything I could do to help out.
12If I'm in public I just go elsewhere and let the parent handle it.
"If you don't like crying children, don't take public transportation, including airplanes."
You know that's just a selfish thing to say.
When someone blasts some insanely loud music from a jukebox, do we not have a right to be annoyed?
What I noticed from the video is that the mom had a "whatever" attitude about her daughter, while strangers around her took more effort to help the child calm down. I'm getting pissed off just looking at her face expression. I know traveling is tiring and all, but this is out of control.
13this is why i don't have kids, because i don't really want to have to deal with them when they go bats**t insane. i admit, when i see a kid having a crying tantrum in a public place i get irrationally angry and i try to leave if possible. people have to realize that they chose to have a kid, nobody else did, and nobody is going to like your kids or tolerate their behavior as much you are. if it's a place like a resturant or a movie (and i don't mean a kid's movie either. whatever happened babysitters?!? did they disappear?) where i'm paying my good money to enjoy an experience and you have your little rugrat screaming or running around and disturbing everyone the parent should try to remedy the situation to make them calm down or take them home. if its like that airplane situation i would have tried to find out if i could switch seats so i could sit by some adults and since i'm sure i would have been able to still hear the kid (and all the rest of the bad ass kids on the plane) i would have put on my headphones.
14oh and for that guy who had the nerve to smack a stranger's kid, i would have got together with the mother to kick his ass for that. what the hell was he thinking?
15I can see both sides of this one.
I don't like children, and I have trouble relating to parents. To me, they seem to become a little divorced from reality. I think your needs systems change radically, and you learn to tune out what is annoying to people around you.
On one hand, I know they can't help it if they're on an airplane and their child is screaming. On the other, if I am at a restaurant, I am paying for ambience - and I just don't want to be bothered by your reproduction. II they can't behave, keep them in line or keep them home.
I was on an international flight earlier this year - and I had 14 hours of pure hell sitting next to a screaming child. I shot the woman dirty looks and at one point she asked me, "Do you want me to jump out of the plane." I didn't answer, but it would have been yes.
16You can't just not take public transportation, that's a completely ridiculous suggestion. You could just as easily say the same thing for parents with young, loud children. I would honestly pay extra for buses/flights/metro cars without kids on them. Totally worth it.
17Ugh this is always so awkward when it happens. I work part time at a high end salon and last weekend we had a screamer. the child wasn't getting a haircut but mom was and she did nothing. The child's uncle was there watching the little girl but didn't really do anything about it until about 15 minutes of SCREAMING (not crying). So they went outside for 5 minutes came back in and the child began screaming again for a good 10 minutes. Clients are always pissed because they go to the salon to relax especially ones that are getting facials and other relaxing treatments. I never know if it is okay to say something because not many people bring their children because it's not really a child friendly place.
18Yikes, that story about the man slapping the 2 year old is out of control.
19Once upon a time I didn't have children. Once upon a time I was a wiatress. So I know both sides of the coin now.
If one of my boys cries during dinner at a restuarant.. I will leave with him. It sucks for me not to be able to enjoy the dinner I paid for and abandoning the people I came with..but the whole restuarant shouldn't be punished if a little guy is cranky or tired or whatever.
Do not take your child to the movies unless it is a kid movie. G rated. I know it sucks to have to pay for a babysitter as well as a mive but deal with it. My hubby and I sometimes take turns watching the kids so the other can sneak to a movie alone. Would we rather go together sure..but you make sacrifices when you have kids. Don't make others paying movie goers suffer.
Once I had to fly home to California for a family emergency alone with a 2 year old and a 6 month old. After struggling to get through security with two car seats, a double stroller, a carry on bag, the baby bag, a portable DVD player and two young children without any assistance.. and then figuring out how to load two car seats down a narrow aisle and attach them while juggling the boys and bags and other people trying to board.. we settled in for a 4 hour flight. The baby was a dream.. the two year was hell. He quickly became bored of puzzles, coloring, games, movies, cartoons and began crying that he wanted out of his seat(this would have been a very bad idea cause he loves to run..can you imagine?)I was hell bent on him staying in his car seat for the trip. Try getting an angry determined 2 year old back into a car seat.. they are remarkably strong and arch their backs to prevent you from succeeding...no way was I going to go through that on a plane with witnesses. I was subjected to the rude comments, horrible looks and the shame of knowing I was making everyones trip horrible..but what can you do? I tried everything.. he finally cried himself to sleep and the stewardess snuck me a glass of wine and said she could see I was trying.. I could have cried in gratitude. And if I could have afforded it I would have bought everyone on board a drink as well to apologize.
Just you wait till you have children.. they will strike when you least expect it.. Easter Sunday in church.. a professional family portrait sitting.. a funeral.. a restuarant.. a plane.. after you just spent $250.00 to get into Disneyland.. you will find yourself horryfied and walking someones butt back to the car! You will see!!
20control your kids. a crying baby is every bit as annoying as a car alarm going off or a cell phone ringing the entire time you're eating dinner or on a plane. not reasonable.
21I understand is very annoying but there is so much parents can do. flights for babies are not fun, they are frustrating for both, the parent and the child. Some people are saying control your kid, but you can't do much reasoning with a 0-3 year old. The other day my 7 month nephew started to made noises of excitement while my brother and sister in law were having lunch in a restaurant and this guy told a 7 month baby shush. You have to have certain amount of patience when you are in a public place and the same goes to parents you should try to avoid places that you know your child is not going to be comfortable. Anonymous # 7 comparing kids and smokers is a little extreme. You can't outlaw babies from public places.
22if the parent tried like number 20 then i guess i'd say spend more time talking to your child. my parents say me and my sister never did anything like that, because they never babied us - since i was 6months old they were reading Russian classics to me. it's how you raise your child. and also don't let others (like grandmas and aunties) interfere in your child's raising up - they tend to spoil them. and you're the bad guy in the end. and don't give in. one of my friends had a baby - the little girl is 2 now and she doesn't listen to her mum that much, just because she's a friend, and daddy is the authority figure.
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