Thanks to the sexual revolution, women can have sex whenever they want to without too much social opprobrium. That being said, some people think that if you want a monogamous relationship, there's one hard-and-fast rule: don't have sex on the first date. Since blanket statements never account for the realities of the individuals involved, there are always exceptions to "the rule."

Have you ripped your date's clothes off on the first date and then found yourself dating for some length of time, or actually having a relationship?









3suisses
Emanuela Passeri
Office
nope...not first, second, or even third techincally
1but within a week of meeting, yes
No onthe first date...don't have the stomach for it... propz for those you don't give a cr@p!
2I wouldn't say I dont give a cr@p. I slept with my husband on the first date. We spent almost 12 hours together on our first date and by the end of it, we couldn't keep our hands off of each other. We got married 6 weeks later and will be married 6 years on the 4th.
3Yes, what was supposed to be a one night stand turned into a lifetime of committment
. We are on our third year of marriage and we dated for 4!
4Great topic!
I made my husband wait till we were engaged to have sex. I amvery liberal, but have been conservative in my number of sexual partners. It worked out well!
5I waited until marriage to lost my virginity and so did my husband.
6The best decision we made was to save sex for marriage. Then we were able to enjoy a special, romantic, sexual relationship, without fears of disease, betrayal, comparisons or fears of infidelity. If we kept ourselves under control before marriage, we certianly can after marriage. Married sex is amazing...
Married 30 wonderful years!
7I didn't have sex on the first date. I'm a lady!
I was topless though,lol.
8Current partner? no, made him wait almost a month. But in college, yes, and that relationship lasted a few years
9No. Actually, HE said to me, "I'm not having sex with you tonight." To me, that's awesome because I was so into him, I could hardly contain myself. We get married in April!!
10No. We've been married for 5 years.
just no sex.
11I was taking my sweet time (as usual, it wasn't even that long, by the way) and he actually said that I was the first gal who made him wait that long.
I just never had sex on the first date, sure, there were times of heavy petting and making out
well yes and been together for 5 years getting married this summer.
12LOL @ Smacks83.
No, I don't have sex on the first date. When it comes to physical intimacy, it takes a considerable amount of time for me. That's just me. But I've been told I'm worth the wait.
13I've never had sex on the first date, but I have friends who have with their partners, and it's worked out OK for some of them.
I just like to get to know somebody before we get it on, or even have makeout sessions. I'm stuck in 10th grade when it comes to this sort of thing... I just love the awkwardness and anticipation before a first kiss. Don't tell anybody, but I am a secret super-romantic. Shh!
14Yes, and we've been married 2 years in October, been together for 4.
15my current man was a rebound guy!! broke up with a loser on a thurdsay night, met my guy at my cousin's rehearsal dinnner on a friday night, and we slept together after the wedding on saturday. its my longest rebound relationship -- or ANY relationship! -- ever
16Yes, sort of. We had flirted a little earlier on, and when he showed up at the party I was at, we went over to his place afterwards. Then started dating + benefits, and now we are "exclusive" =)
17I would have but he made me wait like 3 months!!!
18Boys these days huh?
Yes, and we have been together over 2 years now and plan to get married next summer... and I feel I should mention that I had only slept with one person before him... So I think sometimes you just know something is different :smiles:
19I've been with my boyfriend for nearly five years now. We were friends for a couple months, and we weren't dating the first time we slept together, but we were both sober! We started dating after that, and it's been great ever since.
20I would have, and I'm totally not against sex on the first date if you're feeling it. As for me, we had sex within the first week and 6 years later we're still together, so I don't really believe that crap about "he won't respect you" if you do it too soon.
21No
22I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend (of 7ish months) on the first date. It wasn't even really a date so to speak--I didn't know until later that night that he wanted to date me. He said he wanted to wait to have sex, and I truly appreciate that he said that. I ended up convincing him (haha) a few dates later, and now I wish we had waited longer.
23Hell yeah!
24My bf and I started out just having sex. It supposed to be a no strings attached arrangement. Well, that quickly turned into an exclusive relationship when we both admitted we had feelings for each other. I don't regret any of it. I don't like to make rules.
25no. We did kiss though. I couldn't help myself with that. However, it does take me a while to get comfortable doing anything else with anyone .
26No but I sure tried!
He made me wait a whole entire week. It was so embarrassing.
27Yes, but I wouldn't recommend it. I was rebounding which is why I didn't care, but somehow we still hit it off the morning after.
With my current bf it was four dates (some were long). It actually felt right, I wasn't rebounding, and I was comfortable.
28Not sex, but he defiantly spent the night
29No, I'm not really a sex on a first date kinda gal (though I certainly don't judge anyone who *does* have sex on a first date). My hubby and I didn't have sex until after a month or so of dating.
30um, no. not with him or any other first date. ladies, not a good idea. you don't know anything about them. they might be stalkers, have std's, be married or engaged. not a good choice.
31Sort of. My husband and I were just friends for 7 months, and the first time we really went out together like a couple, we went home and got it on.
32Um, it wasn't even a date. I went out with a girlfriend, she had her housemate be our DD. He went out with us, he took us to the store before we went home... He drank when we got home, and we made out. I told him I was too drunk to make any decisions, so we went to sleep. I woke him up four hours later, at 6am, and told him "OK, I'm sober now! Let's have sex!" It was three years ago next month.
33yes we did, which was not a normal thing for either of us- trust me!-- and we are still together 3 years later and discussing marriage. it was a blind date but we had spent hours talking on the phone and online during the week before we met and had just clicked instantly
34I'm surprised almost everyone said yes to sex on the first date. How do you do that? Granted, I have only had sex with two guys and it's going to stay at that number because I'm married now, so maybe if I hadn't gotten married and instead dated other guys, I would have gotten more comfortable with sleeping with guys I was dating.
But when I was dating, there was no way I was going to sleep with a guy anytime soon after we started dating. Many factors: I was afraid of getting STDs or getting pregnant, I was self-conscious, I wanted him to want to spend time with me for more than just sex, I'm not really that much of a sexual person, etc. I really don't see how you do it. Usually my first dates consisted of me being extremely nervous, wishing for them to be over and hoping the guy wouldn't try to kiss me. I certainly wasn't imagining him naked and sweaty! My hormones weren't racing to get in his pants! Maybe I'm just sort of a prude or something. I knew my now-husband for eight years before we slept together. And after being friends for so long, you might think that we would have slept together soon after we finally decided to date or that might have been the catalyst to get us to date, but I made him wait about another five weeks. I was terrified I was going to ruin that friendship. But luckily it resulted in marriage.
Anyway, after my whole long post, I'll conclude by saying I just don't think I have the personality, confidence and sexuality to even want to have sex on a first date.
35I didn't on the first date, but not long after. I think that the biggest factor is how long you have known the guy. If you have mutual friends and have hung out before or have otherwise known him for a length of time, I think it's OK to have sex on the first date. If he's some guy you just met at a bar or online or something, it can be dangerous. To me, it's more about safety (not even related to STDs or pregnancy) than any sort of "moral values" I have regarding having sex on the first date.
36Well....with my last boyfriend, we didn't go on our first official date until a month into our relationship. But we didn't even kiss the first time we hung out, though I wanted to! But it was on after that first kiss!! We had a pretty good relationship, were engaged, planning to get married this April...but over Thanksgiving he got another girl pregnant soooo that's over!
37Nope. I've only ever been with one guy, and we did it after 3 and a half months of being together.
38My husband and I had sex about two weeks after our first date. IMO I thought I gave it up too fast, he said it felt like forever.
39Well, my partner and I were friends first but we did sleep together on our first official date so I'm not sure if that really counts.
40I think it completely depends. Just because it's the first date it doesn't mean that it's the first time you've met someone. Also sometimes you just know.
I've been with my current boyfriend for nearly two years now. We met through mutual friends and got to know each other a little first before having our first official date. We were going out for about 4 months before we actually slept together. I'm a little older than him and he was actually a virgin when we met. It was important to me that everything was right for him as I knew it meant a lot to him. He'd said he'd never met anyone before that it felt right with- which to be honest is a rare trait in a 19 year old male! It was special and I'm glad that we waited.
However just because that was right for us it doesn't mean that if you don't wait things aren't going to work- which is why I like this topic! Sometimes you can really just have so much sexual tension with someone you can't wait to rip each others clothes off
ha x I
think this thread's proved that! Having sex on the first date is often thought of as having an irresponsible one night stand, I think this threads proved that isn't always the case with lots
of people saying that their relationship is still going strong or in some cases actually ended up in marriage
41No, but there was some naked-ness involved.
42I waited a few weeks before sleeping with my ex husband! I wasn't planning to be with him long term so I wasn't really pressed to get frisky with him. He was a rebound and I wasn't very attracted to him at first. Then I started to like him... a lot. We were together for 10 years, and he's still my best friend.
43Yup. Not exactly broadcasting that fact but we are married now, so it didn't make any difference.
44In the past I waited and that didn't seem to warrant any guarantees either.
for me to have sex with a guy i have to feel comfortable... so whether it's the first or the twenty first it's all about how i feel with him
45but no i've never slept with a guy on the first date...
Not really. I knew him for over eight years before we went on a date.
46Second date, technically. We have been together three and a half years & will be getting married in one year and one day.
47Yes I did, and we'll be married 10 years 12/2009
48I just went on a first date last night and we definitely hit it off and slept together. I don't regret it at all because it felt right. We really clicked on so many levels and I would like to see it progress further with more dates and then see where that takes us. I've learned from my past that waiting one month or more has no guarantees. It felt right so I went for it
49hahaha YES! we've been together for seven months now and are incredibly happy
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