I didn't have an orgasm during actual intercourse until I was 30.

Ah I'm still waiting. For both, I'm 19 and a virgin. I'm not ashamed of it, I'm just waiting for the right man. I do not have an aversion to masturbation, I just need more practice I suppose? Any advice?

I've always been shy about sex, but oddly enough I had no aversion to masturbation. I lost my 'orgasm virginity' several years before I actually had sex for the first time.

I still can't orgasm through intercourse alone. Nobody knows my body like I do.

I wish more women would take responsibility for their own orgasms. I have a friend who is so open about everything, including sex, yet she won't masturbate. She'll go to her ex-boyfriend and the wrong guys for booty calls

this is reassuring, for years I've been thinking I might be one of those unfortunate women that can't.

I had my first O at 15 all by myself. I consider myself lucky because I have rarely gone without since.

I am 19 and I havn't had sex yet but I had my first orgasm at 15.

I'm still waiting for mine. I lost my virginity 5 years ago but no orgasm yet. I'm like the women in the story, I have an aversion to masturbation. Don't know why.

to the anonymous poster, the 19 year old virgin --- neither being a virgin nor having not experienced an orgasm are shameful!! everyone has their own timeline in terms of their comfort sexually. I masturbated very happily for years until I lost my virginity, and it was really fun "getting to know me", so to speak perhaps weirdly, just taking a mirror and sort of inspecting all of my equipment gave me a lot of insight into how things work (for my period, etc) but also where things are and what feels a certain way. kind of clinical at first, but once you know your way around down there, you're one step closer to experimenting and stumbling upon that big O

I actually had my first orgasm a couple months before I lost my actual virginity, both at 16. Looking back now that seems young, but I have no regrets whatsoever.

I've never orgasmed through masturbation.. I wouldn't say I have an "aversion" to it, but I just don't enjoy it at all. My husband is the only one that excites me

I've been having sex for 5 years and although I don't have an aversion to masturbation, I haven't experienced the big O so far. Don't get me wrong, I have a great lovelife with my guy, but as far as I know, no O's so far I used to be frustrated by it, but now I just figure: as long as I'm having fun in bed and am able to tell my guy what I like, there's nothing wrong with me. Maybe I'll have it someday, and maybe I won't. Who knows?

To those who have never had the big O, have you tried different methods and techniques already? Not prying just wondering

when i was 16

Yes I have, Symphonee, but it just doesn't seem to work. I sometimes feel like I'm almost there (sorry gals if this is an overshare!), but then that feeling just goes away so I kinda feel like just giving up.

Finally had an orgasm after I turned 25, now I can't get enough of it!

***WARNING*** MORE OVERSHARE

@fashion_doll- If the feeling goes away on its own then t probably was an orgasm. Usually those types are cresting orgasms. The feeling builds until release. It isn't always screams and pants involved. Orgasm is nothing but the release of hormones and tension after a buildup period. Kegel exercises really help in building the intensity of cresting orgasms.

Hmm but the thing is, I really don't feel relaxed or anything afterwards. You could be right though, although I don't exactly get the meaning of 'cresting' orgasms, I'm getting in lost in translation here! Could you clarify?

Cresting orgasms slowly build, sometimes, with no real bang-like release moments. It is kinda like a stutter step - it builds and stops at a plateau and repeats. It could be that you are a part of the percentage that scientists are saying are not likely to have an orgasm. Some claim that female orgasm is just a kind of genetic hiccup like nipples on a male.

The best way to achieve orgasm is to stop thinking about it. Don't try for it. Concentrate on what feels good and whatever you do, don't hold your breath.

I was 13, and I gave it to myself. I still don't regularly orgasm during intercourse, like a lot of women, but I'm sure glad I didn't wait

I have my big O before I actually sleep with a guy and I wouldn't live more than a week without my vibrator, it is the only way I get my Os but I still have a lot of fun with sex, for some reason I'm not able to have one during intercouse, but that doesn't bother me, sex is so great and my Os is just part of my relax time. I feel is just two different things for me, my O belong to me and sex is to have fun and love my boyfriend.

For years I thought I hadn't had an orgasm because I expected it to be similar to a man's (ejaculation and all) and I also expected that when I did eventually have one I wouldn't question whether or not that was it because it would be so great/pleasurable that there would be no doubt whether it had happened. But from what I'm reading I've actually experienced cresting orgasms. My biggest obstacle to get over is that I stop either myself or my partner too soon because it becomes too uncomfortable/sensitive and I just don't like it. Any advice would be appreciated.

19... my boyfriend read up, ha

16 and I remember it like it was yesterday!

14 or 15 and it was magical.

@omminka- Lube and indirect clitoral stimulation might help with the discomfort. I can get the link to a couple of article but I'm at work so I will message them to you later

lol I lost my orgasm virginity at 12. No seriously, I had a detachable showerhead in my tub when I was little, and when puberty hit, so did finding out about other things...

Still waiting on the loss of physical virginity (is that really what it's called? Isn't virginity really just a state of mind?), but regarding intercourse orgasm, I've heard that if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. Hopefully I won't be THAT disappointed with a guy!

I think I was 10 or 11 when I lost my O virginity, experimenting by myself in the bathtub. I'm so thankful that I discovered self-pleasuring at that age, because I really think it kept me out of trouble. I didn't have actual intercourse until I was almost 22, because I never needed to.

I had one by myself at 17, but when I lost my actual virginity a little bit later it took forever to have one with my bf, and it wasn't even during intercourse. I still haven't had one during intercourse, which is a bit frustrating. It does make me feel better that a lot of other people have that problem too!

WOW!!! That is soooo sad. Got an orgasm through masturbating as a virgin. And no penetration or toys (vibrators) needed. So I guess I've just had a clitoral orgasm not a vaginal one. But still shocking some people never had either when it's not that hard. again no vibrator needed just some "rubbing" in the right places.

Every time I read one of these topics, or pick up a Cosmo for that matter, I feel like a freak of nature. I have never had a problem orgasming having sex with my boyfriend, and do basically every time we have sex (I can count on one hand the times I haven't, actually). Am I the only one who gets the big O that easily? I didn't orgasm the night my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time and lost our virginity ... but I did the next time, and pretty much every time after that. I almost feel like I should be ashamed of the ease I have with it..

I was also never one to masturbate, I just don't enjoy it.

xxstardust, you have a ton of angry women reading your post right now, cursing you LOL

I was a young teen. I didn't lose my actual virginity until I was 18. I'm one of those women who can't orgasm during sex. Ever. Damn.

Still an orgasm virgin (sadly).

I truly believe that everyone woman should own a vibrator. :) A man's best friend is his dog, a woman's is her vibrator

I had my first at 12 (by myself obviously).

Ladies who have never had an orgasm: buy a Pocket Rocket. Life will never be the same again.

I have 2 kinds of orgasms - clitoridal, and vaginal. The first kind, I've been having forever, by myself. The second type, I was 17, I was having sex with this guy I was CRAZY IN LOVE with (it was our first time together, but not MY first time) - it was this crazy explosive feeling everywhere, and I was like 'JESUS CHRIST, SO THIS IS WHAT IT'S LIKE!".

My boyfriend makes me come like crazy every time. And it's a million times more intense, longer, and more fulfilling than when I do it on my own. So do not despair - guys actually DO have some use. Well, those who know what they're doing, that is!

I had my first orgasm at like, 14 or 15 through dry sex, as embarrassing as that is to say now, haha. I don't masturbate at all. I know that's kind of a rare thing for most people, but I'm just not inclined to, so maybe that helps my body's sensitivity during intercourse because I have an orgasm almost every time. The third time I had sex ever, I had an orgasm. I think my body is just built for sex! lol

xxstardust, I"m the same way!! haha. my bf theorized that it's because we don't masturbate that we're more sensitive. *shrug* but I know that actually the prime time of a woman's life as far as orgasming during intercourse is supposed to be once you hit 30, and up. so everyone who isn't big o'ing in your early 20s just wait! maybe it will hit you!

The first time was when I was seven or eight....yikes i know.

XXstardust I'm the same way, I've never had a problem with it and orgasm every time my husband and I have sex and often multiple times. I was shocked when I learned that other women were different.

I very much remember my first orgasm. My boyfriend actually did it for me and it was during random middle of the night sex. We both randomly woke up at 3:30am or so and basically jumped each other. First orgasm ever and I even (this might be TMI) female ejaculated.

That was about a year ago and it the orgasming happens way more often than not.

To the ladies that can't orgasm but have an aversion to masturbation: You will likely never orgasm until you practice masturbation. You have to know your own body and what works for you before expecting some guy to 'give' you one. Take control of your own body and your own pleasure. Once you do it alone, then it will make it more likely that you will be able to have one during sex.

*** TMI***
I have to disagree with xxstardust and anon 37. I masturbate on a regular basis and I have never had a problem having the big O. I have read actually that scientists think that the ability to orgasm and have multiple ones may be linked to genetics, also female ejaculation. I think I have good genes and my current bf definitely has the ability to get the job done.

I lost both at the same time during a foursome when I was 14 and it was magical. I guess that's why I'm open and not shy when it comes to sex.

For anyone who has any advice (thanks in advance and sorry for the uh, TMI).....

I've been married for a year and my husband was my first sexual partner.
Before marriage, I had NO problem orgasiming and even female ejaculating via masturbation.
BUTT and who doesn't love a big BUTT hehe, I simply cannot orgasm during intercourse UNLESS I play w/myself. My hubby is getting frustrated, he feels like he's not doing it right, etc... but I just cannot orgasm unless I'm helping it along. I mean everything is wonderful; im sexually aroused by him, the attraction is there but what's going onnnn??? Any advice would be cool.... thank you!

#44, I think that's totally normal. I don't have specific statistics on hand, but most women cannot orgasm from intercourse alone. The only solution is to help yourself with your fingers or a vibrator or something at the same time. Are you able to orgasm during oral sex?

hmm... well if orgasm is linked to genetics then i have some really good genes, i get the "big O" multiple times, every time. it helps that my bf knows what he's doing to.
open communication with partners helps too. you should let your guy know what feels good.

I've been sexually active for 6 years, and no man has ever given me an orgasm. Not through sex, oral sex, or using his hands. It's always just been me. I've been masturbating since I was very young, maybe around 12, and I have a clitoral orgasm basically every day. I've never owned anything but a "silver bullet" clit vibrator.... nothing that penetrates... I didn't even know there was a different type of orgasm that I've never had =( The 'vaginal' orgasm. How big of a difference can there really be in the two?

I lost my orgasm virginity before I lost my actual virginity...

I was 16 and it was wonderful!!!

I had my first full on orgasm when I was 21 while masturbating, but had had minor experiences before that (not the full blown fireworks, but I knew something had happened). I still haven't climaxed through intercourse alone, though I've been close a few times. I have to 'facilitate' the process in order to have one.