I said forgive because i know what it feels, but in a way it is difficult... But the way she tell it, even if she hates those girls, i feel like she is a bit tolerant (as she says he has several friends, it means she let him kept them lol)

We all get jealous of female friends, but to say that you hate all of them is a bit strong. I voted not forgive, not because I don't think it's understandable, but because if you keep thinking like that you'll drive yourself crazy and miserable for no reason, and worse, you'll probably drive you two apart!

"let him keep them" french kiss? Wow. If a man tried not to "let me keep" my guy friends, things would be over.
We all get jealous, but what I hate about stealing from True Confessions is that those people don't give a sh*t about whether you forgive them. This person isn't asking for forgiveness, just venting. Why should we pass judgment for venting?

I say not forgive. I work in a male dominated field and have had many male friends and colleagues over the years, and every once in awhile one of these psycho insecure girlfriends or wives pops up with demands that their husbands/bfs don't talk to me, work with me, have lunch, etc. I can't believe these intelligent guys have women like this in their lives. Maybe they think they can't do any better.

Also, don't they trust their men? I would be INSULTED if I was the guy and my gf/wife treated me like this. Now, if the guy has given his gf reason to be worried, that is another story, but again, that's their dynamic that they have to work out....it has nothing to do with me.

People write on here "this is why sometimes I can't stand my own gender". Well, this is the reason for me. I would personally never be with a guy who demanded that I give up my male friends....controlling, insecure, neurotic...all of the things I detest in another person.

ugh. i voted not forgive. i hate girlfriends like this.

I voted forgive because I can understand how she feels. Sometimes it sucks to see your guy give attention to other girls. You just need to learn to handle it. Jealousy can be an ugly thing but it's in all of us. How we handle it is what matters.

I agree with jazzytummy. I've been in the same situation in a job with mostly men. There are those wives/girlfriends who have some very active imaginations about what goes on at work; like it's one big party. We're all working! Yes, we get along well and that makes the day much more enjoyable, but that's where it ends.

I said not forgive, because jealous feelings like this make everyone miserable. Yes, they're human, but toxic. If you can't trust the person you're with you shouldn't be w/ them. That, and I've lost a few great male friends because they got with a psycho.

As much as I don't like to dish it out to Tres, huh... are we giving out advice to people on another website now? Why are you trolling trueconfessions.com to get sunday confessionals?

Weird.

It's just not the same, man. These aren't 'our' confessionals.

Forgive. Sh*t happens. Plus, when it comes down to it, if your boyfriend pays more attention to other women than you, then that would definitely be a cause of jealousy. You never know the true or whole story when you are someone's friend -- you don't know them on another level, so it's completely unfair to judge.

Yeah, this confessional is weird.

But no. If you can't trust your guy with his (girl)friends, that's a serious insecurity on your part or some inkling of infidelity on his - in which case you shouldn't be with him anyway. Also, if he was really into his girlfriends, he wouldn't be with you. Simple. Stop whining!

Well, to me, this is not a matter of forgiveness. I just feel sorry for this woman. She's painfully insecure, and it's uncomfortable (and distressing) to be her. It's sad that she can be deeply upset by other women who are just friends with her boyfriend. While I do have sympathy for her, I also find her pathetic (I know this is harsh, but it's my honest opinion). Her sense of well-being is easily shaken by (presumably) innocent women. Sad.

Furthermore, insecurity is ugly. Look how she comes across.

Ok, she probably doesn't actually "hate" them but she hates the idea of them and hides that from her boyfriend. I can understand this because unfortunately a lot of girls my boyfriend is friends with have secretly had feelings for him which he didn't realize until it was too late. I'm not saying all of them are like that, and many of them are married or in relationships and I have no problem with him being friends with them. He knows how I feel and that I would never ask him to stop being friends with anyone, so he tells me anytime something gets weird. Just last night, a girl that works for him asked him out for drinks--knowing he has a girlfriend because I work there too and everyone knows we moved up here together! That is the kind of girl I don't like, and I feel I have good reason. Of course, the fact that he told me about it makes me love him even more!

Have none of you seen When Harry Met Sally? Guess not. My man has NO female friends, period, that are not part of a couple. We're married-but it's the same thing with single guys.

side note, the girls in the pic look like Gwyneth and Winona

If you don't get over this, you'll only hurt yourself.

not forgive. clearly the fact that you're jealous of attention he gets from them implicitly means you're not getting the attention from him, or anyone else. take a look at yourself before lashing out at women who aren't doing anything to you

I don't like women who don't "let" their boyfriends/husband have female friends. my best friends ex-gf tried to make him stop seeing me, but we have been friends for 10 years so he ended up kicking her to the curb.

um, Kim, that's a MOVIE.

I think it's ridiculous when women don't "let" their husbands do certain things - have female friends, go out with their guy friends, whatever.

He's an adult.

Anyone who says they're not a jealous person, just isn't jealous at that point in time. These feelings are normal. However, I voted "not forgive" because to say you hate any girl that your boyfriend talks to, is a bit crazy.

Does she also hate it when he spends time with the guys because he's not paying attention to her?

Um, it sounds like this person is a little crazy, a lot overly jealous, and probably a bit of a control freak.

I work with about 95% women.(Nursing) It is not a party. We do get along very well for the most part, but I love my girlfriend. She gets pissed off at me if they call or sees me laughing with them. It has taken some fights and time, but now she understands, and I love her more for it.

as a girl whose best friend/ex is a guy who's happily married and i get along with his wife and come and visit them - I say NOT FORGIVE you crazy irrational b****

I can understand she's a bit insecure- but that being said- I have had PLENTY of girlfriends who stabbed me in the back to date my BF or Husband....and plenty of BFs and Husbands who are no longer THAT because they DID....I say if they cheat on you with their friends- good freakin riddance!!! To them all!!

If this girl is not comfortable with these friends, she should talk more openly about her concerns with her boyfriend. Arrange things and situations that are more favorable for herself. Make plans for more one on one events. Make clear statements that you are the girlfriend. Wrap you arms around his waist
around his shoulders, and place your hand down his front pocket during a conversation with his "friends." He's your man and make that very very clear. If these friends are calling, make your voice on his answering machine. Answer the calls and say he can't get to the phone since he is making plans to take you shopping. He'll call you another time after he buys you something very expensive. Maybe when hell freezes over he'll return the call since you're not his secretary and you might forget the message. Make dinner plans with just the two of you. Make travel plans for just the two of you. If someone is dominating his time with conversation it's time to interupt with more important information like that you're not wearing any underwear and to take you home soon. Be smart and make him lose some interest in anyone but yourself.

Uh, dikke kus, sorry, but I have seen women do that kind of thing when I am talking to their husbands/boyfriends, and they look clingy, pathetic, and their insecurity is painfully obvious. The guy always looks a little embarrassed about it as well. And answering the phone like that...please tell me you are kidding. What are you, 16?

While you're at it with your suggestions, how about sending him 50 texts a day, and not letting him go out with his guy friends without you? Have it be all about you with no one else in the picture. All of these things will show everyone that he is your man, and he will love the control freak that you are. Because, God knows, he wants to spend all of his free time with you and you only.

Gimme a break.

Oh, and BTW, you can put your hand down his front shirt pocket as much as you want, it doesn't make him yours. His fidelity does, and whether he is faithful or not has nothing to do with your behavior, it has to do with his.

My boyfriend is always texting and sometimes answers calls and walks away from me. That makes me feel distant like his mind is somewhere else and he's hiding something. He's home every night and works two jobs no real reason not to trust him. But something told me to look at our cell phone records next call he answers and walks away. I got the number in April and asked who's number was it and he wouldn't give me a answer, just ignored me. I asked was it a secret friend and he said no he doesn't have secret friends. Couple months later (still seeing number every now and then on our cell records) Now its end of June I checked his text messages and from the same number there is a message asking are we still going. I got her name and ask him who she is and finally he admits she is a friend from college. He has never mentioned her to me and I asked does she know about me. He says yes but I think he is lying. I later ask and find out he has slept with her before our relationship. Should I trust this now "friend"ship? Should I break up with him? I think it could be the beginning of something more.

Jazzytummy, well I get your take. I'm not 16! Ha ha. Wish I was. I'm happily married with a nice looking husband. But I disagree. Curious, are women are calling your husband to talk? Your boyfriend? How would you answer, uh yes just a minute, I'll get him right away for you? Do single men call you? Would your boyfriend or husband say, oh I understand, here's the phone honey, he's just a friend. C'mon now. Do single women friends call your dad and then how would your mother handle that? Do single women call your close friends boyfriends/husbands? I doubt it. The laws are laid down. When your out, what would you do, just slide over from your BF, and make room for the friends? Those things I suggested are a test. If he's acting embarrassed then he's not very smart about what's going on and that you need to feel more secure. No need to feel pathetic unless he's making you feel that way.

Anonymous I feel bad about your story. It worries me he was not upfront about the ex. It makes it look like he is thinking of her and has some feelings for her. I have no answers except I hope things work out, and you need to get this one out in the open. Good luck.