Depends on how close you two are. If you're like sisters and her daughter's practically your niece, definitely talk to her about it. You're a good friend and you want to look out for her that's not a bad thing. God forbid she brings home a dangerous man and both her and her daughter gets hurt. Just be discrete about it and not so critical.

Frankly, it's none of your business. I'd keep your mouth shut unless you're prepared to lose a friend. She may need to hear it and I agree that this is not a good environment to grow up in for a little girl but at the same time... she's not abusing the kid, she's not being a bad mother and for all you know the kid could learn from her mother's mistakes instead of turn into her. Either way, if the kid's not being abused and it's not your kid then it's none of your business.

I second Fallen's advice.

That said, if you feel strongly enough about it and are okay with losing her as a friend then go for it.

None of your business.

I agree with Gscott. Depends on how close you are. If it bugs you that she's constantly giving you the dirty details on her sex life you at least have to tell her that. I don't blame you for being worried for the emotional well-being of both her and her kid...if you care you should say something, but say it gently.

Mind your own business --is my opinion.

You claim to not preach 'morality,' but your post is dripping on what YOU perceive to be morally right or whatever. Sure, it's your standard, but it's not exactly hers, it seems like. And not mine too, but who am I to say or try to get people to do whatever I think is 'moral?'

Well, if she brags about it to you and you just don't want to listen to stories of her escapades, then do tell her so. I understand how grating it can get listening to non-stop whining/complaining/bragging of each sexual conquests. It also gets real boring. Or if you think it's way too dangerous to just venture with strangers for one-night stands, tell her also. Because nowadays, it IS dangerous. Too many preventable incidents out there.

But trying to lecture her on what to do or what not to do in regards of parenting and morality, the way you've posted here (and I dunno if you're a parent or not), it IS her child and she is not abusing her.
In fact, you claim that she has a stable home, good job and a good mom. Hmmm...Like Fallen said, you can bring it up but you may lose her friendship or maybe she's a nice individual who doesn't mind other people's advice (unasked) on how to raise her daughter, who knows!

Like you said, she is a good parent right? She isn't breaking up with these men because they are abusive or act inappropraitely around her child? As long as the child isn't in danger I don't think you should say anything. These relationships aren't working out for her, but maybe the next one will?

It's really not your business, in my opinion. How old is her child? As long as her child is well cared-for and not suffering for lack of parenting, keep your nose out of it.

Someone has to speak up for the well being of the child. Do you know many children get sexually abused by their mother's boyfriends. But say that extreme case does not occur... I pray that never happens to anyone's child, but it does. But she the fact that children learn by seeing. Social learning theory at it's finest. How will her daughter ever learn about a stable healthy relationship if her mom's sleeping around without a true commitment with her partners. Stability is one of the most important aspects of a healthy childhood and getting a new "daddy" every month is not stable. She should keep motherhood and dating separate and not bring her child into those situations unless it's leading to marriage.

I feel like we see this question every couple of months....

If you are worried about the child's safety and well-being, then you should speak up.

The next time she's running on about a new guy or a bad breakup and she gives you the "well, duh!" comment when you ask whether the daughter's met the guy, just ask her "well, how did your daughter take to him? Did they seem to get along well?" It's possible that maybe your friend just isn't noticing or thinking about how these revovling male figures might be affecting her daughter - because they do, most often negatively. I agree with ThePerfectScore completely on this - children learn by modeling their parents' attitudes and actions. The few resilient children that act and do the opposite of what the parent is doing are pretty rare and have some extra factors [acute maturity for their age, other "positive" role models, etc.] that enable them to say, "I don't want to do what Mommy does."

This isn't a question of morality or promiscuity, because that's her life and that's what she does, it's the fact that she is introducing her *child* into situations that are NONE of the child's business. If your friend cares for her child [and you've said she does], then she should really be careful of who [and what] she's exposing her daughter to.

Yup, it depends on how close you are. Also, on the type of person she is. How does she usually take critiques? Is she a drama-queen? Then no.

But it's really decent of you to think of your friend's daughter's well-being

I think you should say something but not in any kind of confrontational way. As a mom myself, I understand how we can get pretty defensive about our parenting. However, I welcome honest and well-meaning insight. I would bring it into a conversation instead of starting one particularly about it. I agree with margokhal about asking the friend about how her daughter took to the guy and then mentioning casually that maybe she shouldn't introduce every guy to her daughter unless they are really serious. It's probably a good idea to keep her daughter and dating separate for a time until she's sure about the guy. And say it because you care, not because you want to judge the way she's doing things.

From what you describe here, I think there's something else going on than just a difference in moral standards. It sounds like she's really lonely, desperate for someone to love her and to be a father figure to her daughter. She probably is well-aware of the emotional problems revolving-door daddies cause. Try addressing those needs rather than just questioning her actions. That might prove to be more beneficial in the long-run.

While she may not be being a bad parent, the plethora of men her daughter is seeing is bad enough for the upbringing. I am sure it is hard enough for her daughter to not have a stable father figure let alone constantly meeting new men and not understanding where they go.

I am a firm believer in the fact that good friends tell their friends what they NEED to hear even if they don't want to hear it. Your concern is genuine and you should definitely tell her how you feel. Be careful though, you run the risk of her getitng mad. Don't be too preachy but be honest and empathetic.

I agree that it depends on how close you two are. I know people who have moms that bring in different guys, and its always something that sparx emotional issues later. So if you guys are close, talk to her about it.

I think you are being very judgmental. Is this really about the child, or about some sort of irritation that your friend brings up in you? Why are you so upset by her sexual behavior? Why does her promiscuity make you angry?

Take a look at yourself before you start meddling.

The child is hers and she has a right to raise her any way she sees fit.

With respect, I really don't agree with that, Bearwoman. We may be very proud of sexual freedom for women, but we can't overlook the fact that this particular woman's promiscuity could very well affect her little daughter's perception of men. I think the OP is being a good friend and it has nothing to do with irritation or jealousy.

I think you should only comment about how all these men coming in and out of her daughter's life may not be a good idea and leave it at that. Try to get her to see that it may be confusing to a child like her daughter and also may cause unnecessary sadness for the daughter if the daughter really liked one of the father figures (her bfs) but they always do not seem to stay around for a long time. I wouldn't mention anything about her sleeping with a lot of men too quickly and just limit the issue to the daughter problem. It's your friend's choice to sleep with whoever and whenever she wants, but I don't think it hurts to tell her to perhaps consider not introducing her bf or these men to her daughter until the two of them have dated x number of months or has a stable relationship (but you have to understand and communicate to her that it's really her call at the end of the day, but at least you brought forward the issue to her attention). I would not recommend you intervening with her relationships because that will most definitely jeopardize your friendship and you also have to respect her decisions and the mistakes that she will make and hope that eventually she will learn from them. While I do agree that it is really none of your business like others have mentioned, I feel that if I was in your position as a close friend, I would say something (though others may disagree).

If she is your friend, it IS your business. She depends on you for advice that she may not get elsewhere. I have a friend in a similar situation. She's not promiscuous, has a daughter with no father figure, and is now pregnant again. I give her my advice, but she tends not to listen. Some people are meant to live these kinds of lives. I'm sure my friend will make it work the best she can. I am disappointed b/c another child will come into this world w/out a consistent mother/father relationship. That disgusts me, yet I still love my friend. There's only so much love and advice one can offer a friend like that.

Someone has to vouche for the daughter since the mother is too caught up with herself.

Okay, what is "promiscuous" here anyway? I think of "promiscuous" as someone who has a lot of one-night stands, dates a lot and sleeps with whomever they date. It sounds to me like this mother is having some short-term relationships that she hopes become long-term. I don't see that as promiscuous. How else is she supposed to get married again, if that is indeed what she wants? She may be financially unable to afford a babysitter every time she wants to see her boyfriend. I can imagine it being very difficult to completely keep a love life and your child separate as a single mom. Since lots of people on here seem to think that can be done, please explain how...

Sorry Bearwoman but I found a lot of things just wrong with your response.

"Why are you so upset by her sexual behavior? Why does her promiscuity make you angry?"

Being concerned about your friend's well being is something that friends do.

"Take a look at yourself before you start meddling."

She already mentioned that she wasn't a saint herself

"The child is hers and she has a right to raise her any way she sees fit."

No, just because she gave birth to her daughter doesn't mean she has the right do what she sees fit. So what it she was doing drugs and bringing it around her daughter, would you say "she has the right to raise her any way she sees fit?" Absolutely not. That's why there are laws and social services who take children away from parents everyday because of mentality like that.

She has the right to do what's best for her daughter, not her vagina.

Girls are very impressionable and learn from their mother at an early age. What the friend is doing is showing her daughter that it's ok to have revolving men come in and out of her life. That's not a healthy way to teach a child about relationships and I'm sorry call me judgmental too, but in this day in age a women need to more choosy about who they bring into their lives. Especially women with small children.

Goodness forbid someone should be made to feel bad about their decisions and how they affect others.

Sometimes I think we get too caught up the mentality "it's not my business." Personally I think it's just a cop out for not wanting to get involved, deal with situations or tell people things that might be difficult or hurt their feelings. If we all had that mentality how would we look out for our friends, give them advice or protect them from hurting themselves.

If it is someone you care about and love it IS your business.

MYOB. Yeah, it's not a good situation, there's loads that could be fixed about it! But that's her life, her decisions, ultimately her consequences and her daughter to raise the way she chooses. You lead your life you think is appropriate, and let her be her.

I think this is a situation where you should keep your opinions to yourself unless the daughter is at direct risk - like you really believe the mother or one of her revolving door bfs is abusing her in any way and you have proof to back it up. It's hard, because you care about the daughter, but it's not your place and giving your friend parenting advice is probably going to cause conflict between you. Plus it's something you should get used to...you're not going to agree with how most of your friends raise their children, but that doesn't mean it's your business.

I think that who this woman sleeps with is her choice, because it is her body and her life. That said, I think that it may be appropriate to bring up the issue of how it feels for her daughter, but you would have to do it in a nonconfrontational manner so that she doesn't think you are telling her how to be a 'good parent'. If you can see that it is hurting her child, then it might be good to bring it up with her. Don't be accusatory or judgemental, approach it gently. Good luck.

A couple of people have commented on my comment. I think I might have sounded a bit abrasive before, but I still believe her friend has first say in her daughter's upbringing.

Good luck to the woman who posted this. It's not a simple situation.