Steve Santagati, of BadBoysFinishFirst.com and author of the best-selling book The Manual, answers your burning questions when it comes to dating, love, and how men think. He's a veteran at giving street-smart, straight-to-the-point advice, so ladies, tell me, what do you want to ask Steve about men? This is your chance to get answers, so don't hold back! Submit your questions here.
New Year's Eve! Ugh, Ryan Seacrest, the Jonas Brothers, precocious Miley, or some Lifetime special. Are those our choices? It's as if we share the New Year with a TV! Of course there is always the overpriced bar/restaurant party that promises "All your wildest dreams will come true." You know that scenario all too well; 11:48 p.m. clicks, and you scan the room like a shark looking for a helpless seal — a.k.a, someone to kiss when the clock strikes 12:01. You've jacked yourself up on more alcohol than is safe, so he doesn't have to be cute, just available. Let's not do that this year.
To see what Steve suggests, read more.
It's not about the venue, it's about the pressure women put on themselves not to be alone. Funny though, because you're alone right now reading this and you don't feel like any less of a woman. You may have been alone on the 29th and you may be alone on the 2nd, but come hell or high water, you can't bear to be alone on the 31st! Do you see how ridiculous that is? I've got news for you; a lot of guys are on to this. Not only that, but I look at New Year's Eve as easy pickin's — drunk desperate girls. That simple. Hate me for it, but it's true. My job is to let you know how guys think, and that is how we think. If your New Year's resolution is to wake up with some louse, then go for it, but if not, keep it all relative.
My best New Year's Eve — one of — was spent on the side of a mountain in Vermont with two other people, a bottle of champagne, cheap sparklers, standing in the snow, and braving minus-20-degree weather. My point is, if you're even going to bother celebrating this eve, make it with someone you care about, and with someone who cares about you. You may not have bragging rights at the water cooler, but you'll have something much deeper; a bond with your close friends.
Whatever you do this year, don't get drunk and act stupid; get buzzed and act stupid! It's just another night. That is the reality. Don't you want to live in reality?
Check out his Bad Girls Finish First t-shirts and for individual attention, visit Steve at BadBoysFinishFirst.com or email him at askstevesantagati@gmail.com.
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Hmm... Richard Gere really needs a shave.
1I've never understood the obsession with being with a "romantic interest" on NYE. I'm flying to Houston to meet up with my best friends... I couldn't think of any better way to spend the holiday.
2I agree monday--every year no matter what my status, I always get together with my friends. This year we are going to a club opening (which I paid way too much to attend) but I am excited nonetheless, single and all.
3I used to like Steve from his appearances on Oprah. However, after reading his various suggestions and advice, it appears I was swayed by his charm and demeanor. This guy is a sexist ass. There's just as many drunk desperate guys as girls on New Year's Eve.
4Yeah, but it's never hard to take home a guy, Nitachequita. NYE happens to be a particularly easy night for guys on the prowl.
5I'm not dealing with men until well into 2009... why ruin a good thing?
6lol Mesayme. I agree with Steve but the same can be said for men...I was at a club last year and I had guys lining up trying bring me home or trying to make out with me at the end of the night...I turned them all down and went home on my own...
At about 2 am it was
seriously I turned down a guy ever 5 minutes for 30 minutes..and it just started getting ridiculously funny...I turned down a few 2 or 3 times because they were too drunk to remember trying
to hit on me...or they thought they'd tried again cuz I might be more drunk 
ew.
7I have never understood why people get so nerved up when they realize that New Years is here and they have no one to kiss at midnight or that they don't have a man at all. So what. It's not like your years is going to be any better if you get a kiss from a man or if your hanging out with your man instead of your girlfriends.
Just have a fun and safe night and look positively forward to the new year that's ahead of you.
8I don't know why that NYE kiss is such a big deal either, especially from a complete stranger. I mean, really, do people expect that that kiss or lack therof is going to set the tone for the entire year? GAWD!
Oh, and really Steve, men go to bars to meet drunk women in order to get into their pants?
NOOOO! Tell me it isn't true! I thought they went there for the stimulating conversation! Note to self: when a guy talks you up at a bar, he is hitting on you and wants to take you home....THANKS STEVE!
9The guy I am seeing isn't even going to be here for NYE, and I couldn't care less about a NYE kiss. I'm not a huge partier so I find it unappealing to dress up just to get drunk, so I'm staying in with some friends.
By the way, this advice is surprisingly not bad... but Steve still seems like a huge tool to me.
10Um, wow, I learned a lot from this post!
...Not.
He gets paid for this??? ...Can I get paid for this, too? Pretty please?
11Geez, wtf? These posts are really f*cking offensive and a lot of guys don't even think like Steve does. This is pointless. I agree that Steve is totally sexist. How can you say it's just a bunch of drunk desperate girls!?!? You know, the girls can't do anything by themselves. It takes two to tango. So obviously there is an exact equal number of guys doing the same thing the girls are doing.
Steve: "Not only that, but I look at New Year's Eve as easy pickin's". So that sounds like the guys are always looking for drunk easy hook-ups and just have an easier time on New Year's Eve. And then Steve says: "You may have been alone on the 29th and you may be alone on the 2nd, but come hell or high water, you can't bear to be alone on the 31st!" So, girls mostly just look for the drunk easy hook-ups on New Year's Eve. So in other words Steve, your saying, guys are always man wh*res and girls mostly are just one day of the year. Hmm, doesn't seem so bad to me.
12I think you guys are kind of missing the whole point here. He's saying not to be drunk desperate GIRLS because his audience here ARE GIRLS. Not that there are no drunk desperate guys out there. He's writing to his audience. Chill. I think it's hilarious how offended you ladies get at everything he says . . . yet many, many guys out there think exactly like him. This site exists because men and women think differently, period. Men really do think like him, even the good ones. Chill the f*ck out.
13Littlelady...first of all, I am personally not "offended" by Steve, I just don't look at his comments as the be all and end all of male thinking. I don't get it...he is the self professed "bad boy" who is supposed to give us the low down on what dogs men are? News flash...you can, should, and will figure that out on your own.
Second of all, maybe I am just more experienced, but give me a break...Women don't already know guys are looking to get laid and have a thousand lines and avenues of bullsh!t to reach that goal?
Steve sometimes comes across to me as really condescending, like we have absolutely no clue about men. He is basically not telling me anything I don't already know when it comes to how men behave around drunk women. I think it is interesting that just because he is a man, we are supposed to be in awe about his great insights? Well, if someone is learning from him, great, but as far as this particular topic goes, if you don't already know the answer, you are either 10 years old or have lived under a rock your entire adult life.
14I agree with jazzy. This is pointless "advice". And Steve does come across as extremely condescending. Steve acts like we're all just innocent little girls that need to be enlightened to the ways of the world. And also like jazzy said, it's like then once he "enlightens" us we are supposed to be in awe of his amazing knowledge. And yeah, I do feel offended by these posts. B/c I feel like I'm not respected as a woman. Steve seems like one of those guys that never takes a woman seriously, that always brushes you off and would throw money at you and tell you to go shopping to get you out of his way, or that just laughs and says "yes, sure darling" to every single thing you say.
LittleLady: If good guys act like Steve I want to be single and happy for the rest of my entire life. That's just sad. Good guys don't think about the best way to get a drunk girl home with them. Good guys don't think anything like Steve at all, that's why he's a "bad boy". I hope for your sake you don't have a bf like Steve and think he's one of the best out there. B/c trust me, I have a good guy and he thinks nothing like Steve, he actually respects me.
15If I were a guy, I think I would probably be slightly offended by his take on this "situation." His premise is that all men think alike, which completely stripes men away from any individuality, and essentially equates them to a bunch of horny robots (which yes, we know some are). Still, the way he simplifies men and women's behavior for his own agenda is very obnoxious.
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