Leave. He'll get help when he's ready.

Been here, done this. Doll he's a cheater.... and he won't stop. The fights and the reasons he keeps giving you are all excuses to cheat and make you feel guilty or sympathetic for him in the process.Don't put up with it, get out, because if he doesn't want you the way you are and if can't appreciate you then he isn't good enough for you.

leave.

So he blames you for his "addiction". Oh please. Leave this loser.

He's a liar, he's a cheater, he is using you, and please don't tell me you believe all those crap excuses!? And he is blaming you for it all!! LEAVE HIM!!! He's a total douche.

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because people who mind don't matter and people who matter don't mind."

Bail immediately.

Either way, he cheated on you. If he truly had a sex addiction, he should have been up front about it with you at the beginning of the relationship, so that you were aware he had a problem and he should have gotten help a long time ago if he knew he had a problem. In my opinion, from what you stated, he doesn't sound like a sex addict. He sounds like a cheater who needs to be single because no one deserves to get hurt the way he's hurting you.

He may be an addict but there's *no* way he didn't know that it's wrong to do this. He's only making up excuses to cover his butt and prevent you from leaving him. However, unless you get him to acknowledge the problem and seek professional help, leave.

run away now. there's nowhere good this is gonna go for you.

Uh, am I the only one that caught the line of

"he doesn't find me mentally stimulating so he goes outside of the relationship (online) for a quick fix, that he feels like our connection isn't there as much as it used to be"

?? I mean there are 2 red flags here...regardless of his sex addiction, or possibility of one, if this is how he looks at you, then I think it smart to realize that the relationship is over anyways...and TWO, how is your self esteem that you'd be with someone who thinks of you this way? He doesn't find you mentally stimulating and you concentrate on the fact he's looking at tons of women online? See the bigger picture hun, he's just not that into you:)

RUN.

Even if you decided to stay and work on, I don't think he will meet you half way, and it is He who needs to be doing the work here.

He doesn't seem like much of a prize, get rid of him.

I agree with Berlin, forget the sex addiction this:

"he doesn't find me mentally stimulating so he goes outside of the relationship (online) for a quick fix, that he feels like our connection isn't there as much as it used to be"

is the problem here. Major sign he's not that into you. He fully came out and said it. You need to reevaluate yourself because the fact you seem to have just brushed over that to focus on this sex addict foolishness is a sign that you might not respect yourself as much as you should.

So I say dump the jerk before he dumps you and start to focus on yourself for a while.

First of all the fact that he is trying to put the blame on you by saying that you are not mentally stimulating enough is a sign that he is not gonna stop and is not taking this seriously. The problem is his and not yours. He is a major jerk for trying to blame it on you when the fact is that he has cheated plain and simple. He is not worth your time and I know you love him but many times love is not good enough of a reason to stay. You can do better. I'd say leave him alone with his computer and find someone that values you.

Pump the brakes and throw him out of the car.

What a total jerk - when he told you that you weren't mentally stimulating enough, did you not let him know that he was not humanly stimulating enough - and then immediately packed his bags and thrown them out the f*cking window? Start with the computer.

When the place is clean of his presence, you'll find your self-esteem, right there in the room, glowing in all its intensity. You deserve just about... hmmm.... a million times better than this absolute loser/cheater/verbally abusive *sshole.

It's his excuse, and it's a poor one at that. Like all the others, you don't deserve this, dump him before he gets you an STD or something horrible!

I know u luv him, but please! Leave him nkow! It'n just his excuse...

This is terrible. Leave NOW.

He says he "doesn't find you mentally stimulating"...which is a BIG red flag for me. It doesn't explain why he cheats, but it does say something about how he feels about your relationship. Also, he "feels like you're not connected"...he's already emotionally and physically not into this relationship anymore. He's already out of it, even without the cheating. And he seems to be just stringing you along instead of ending it. Who needs that?

As far as the sex addiction, I don't know for sure[not a professional], but from what I understand and learned about addictions, I'm inclined to think he's just making an excuse for cheating. Has he ever displayed this "sex-crazed" behavior with you, when you first started dating or not during fights? Does looking and talking to girls online keep him from his normal daily functions? Usually, any sort of addiction would mean that he'd be so obsessed with sex and seeking that sexual stimulation that it would severely interfere with the rest of his life (work, school, your relationship).

Yes, you may care for him very much, but you deserve better than this. It's not worth "loving" someone who's just not into being with you.

Is it just me or is "sex addiction" the new get-out-of-jail-free card for cheaters? I have a medical disorder and can't help myself? I was running, slipped and fell and my penis accidentally pushed inside her?

Please. More like, I am a cheating douche who refuses to own my sh*tty behavior. I agree that this guy does not give a rat's ass about your feelings. Really, ask yourself, does he deserve your love?

To me it brings up another question that I have been curious about...to anyone who wants to answer, is communicating on Facebook/Myspace with other women considered cheating? I am not talking about known friends, I mean online conversations with women your guy has never met. What do you think? Where do you draw the line? Do you have "rules" about this with each other?

I would leave him. I think you deserve more than that.

I hate to be blunt but the first problem women have with men is that they want to change them. They are past the age of CHANGE. Addicted to sex isn't the same as addicted to cigarettes. Just like being gay isn't the same as someone addicted to drugs. One of those items you can change the other you can not. You can't help them, or change them. You can only take care of yourself. In the end you will do what you want to do. Posting this blog won't do a damn thing for you except give you maybe a little advice. you need to be a lot more self assured that this thing called love isn't coming back to you. He doesn't love you the way he should. You know in your heart what you need to do. If you didn't you would not have signed on to this to ask. THis is a desperate cry for help! You know what you need to do. You are strong enough to do this. Sex addictions aren't funny things to play with . Guys with problems with sex like this can get scary and ugly. GET OUT NOW! You can always love him but love him from afar. And don't jump into living with the guy so fast.

May I please ask why the h**l you want to stay with a man who has told you you aren't mentally stimulating.. basically he told you right there he doesn't like you. This "sex addiction" is a ploy to get rid of you. Just dump him.

you couldnt run away from this guy fast enough. he already explained to you that he doesn't find you mentally stimulating. what more could you possibly need to hear from him? run run run as fast as you can!

Have some self-respect and leave this douchebag. Not only is he being completely disrespectful and inappropriate, he insulted you and basically blamed you for his behavior. Either cut your losses and get the hell out of there, or settle in for some major heartache.

He isn't a sex addict, he's just scum. Get out now!

These are excuses to justify his behavior!

You need to leave and save yourself the heartache

God, he sounds verbally abusive in the things he says to you. That alone should convince you to leave. It sounds like you have no self-esteem. The addiction crap is just an invention on both of your parts. Just get away from him AWAP.

ASAP I meant!!

Dump him! Please! He is a cheater, and you shouldn't support him at all, even if this is a real addiction. He can get therapy and try again with you in a few years if that's really the case, though I doubt it is. He hasn't shown that he loves and cares for you. If he is so sure he has an addiction, why doesn't he love you enough to seek help? I don't buy his excuse. I hope you leave him and find someone who treats you right. I know you love him, and it will be painful to break up, but I think if you stay with him, things will be even harder.

I say bounce, you have only been dating for a year. Plenty of fish in the sea.

If a guy ever said to me that he "doesn't find me mentally stimulating" so he has to "go outside of the relationship" to get his fix, I'd stimulate him with fists of fury.

I just registered a new name so I can comment on this. I'm a female, and I do something very similar to this, except I'm married. It IS an addiction and I tell myself I can stop anytime, but you just can't. Its too enticing, someone calling saying, 'meet me here in 10 minutes.' it started when me and my husband had a big argument about divorce. I was devastated, he was the one who brought it up. I thought everything was peachy. it hasn't gotten any better, and I'm getting in deeper and deeper with more and more people. some of the men know exactly what I'm doing, some of them think they are the only one, some know I'm married, etc. I don't keep track anymore. I understand what the 'boyfriend' is doing, he should just leave the girl, they aren't even married! by the way, I'd like to see more topics on women who have affairs, its always about the men.

I think the relationship should end. Not only he's cheating, but he's blaming you for it. Not a good guy here.

And addiction or habit is no one's fault but that person's. Regardless of what many thing, we choose to do everything in life. It comes with the gift of free will. Just remember, even if he's going around blaming your for his actions, it's never your fault. In addition, since he's cheating, anything you've doing that isn't "enough" for him, is thrown off the table by his actions. He's given you power to do what you want with the relationship and this point. He's freed you to do whatever you want. So this is practically the perfect time to wipe him from your life and move on. You're no longer at fault for anything period.

I don't think he's a sex addict. But it doesn't excuse him from being a douche bag. Plus, there were SO MANY signs that he does not love you or care for you a bit. So why are you still with a guy who does not deserve you? If my guy ever said some of the things your bf said, I'd smack his head right away with a frying pan. Have some self respect and leave him ASAP.

He's a playa! The boy mama warned you about!

"i love him with all my heart" this is why I cant stand females.

His excuses sound like verbal abuse to me. He won't change. Is it an addiction? I seriously doubt it. He is just trying to make you feel guilty or somehow responsible for his slime bag behaviour. Get out, it is not going to change!
Good luck to you and please love and respect yourself enough to know that you deserve better than this.

A sex addict? Yeah like hell he is.

Do yourself a favor and don't waste another minute fiddle farting around with this lying,cheating, piece of sh*t.....