what!?!?! That is the most ridiculous thing I've heard. How can a parent dump their child? How can Nebraska pass a law like that?
wow.

The law is terrible. But even worse is what these teens must have felt being abandoned by their parents. A baby is not aware when it is being left behind, a teen certainly is and will be for the rest of their lives. It's just horrible.

I agree with safe havens for unwanted children in general... I'm not sure how to feel about these older children though. How heart breaking.

Oh my god, what could possibly justify a law like this? Even 18 year olds are still babies to me.

so apparently that woman's daughter was lashing out so bad she had no choice but to dump her in a cold hospital? With a bunch of strangers? Yeah, that's definitely gonna help her lost child figure everything out.

I think the law is a good thing. It was intended for women who choose to carry their babies to term but do not have the means or desire to raise them.

How awful for the older children though. I can't imagine the psychological damage that happens when you know your parents are abadoning you.

This really has become a hideous mess - it's too bad the law prevents these parents from being prosecuted. Raising kids is hard, times are tough, blah blah blah - there's NO excuse for abusing your children this way.

That's so sad. I can't think of many things worse than a parent just dumping his or her teenaged child on the street (I know not literally, but that's how it seems to me).

Too bad somebody can't throw those parents in a dumpster.

Hey, all-

Regarding why they would pass a law like this in the first place, it was kind of a mistake. Or "unintended consequences." The law was originally to apply just to infants. Similar laws in other states only applied to babies less than 72 hours old. Some lawmakers, though, felt awkward about assigning that cutoff. Three days old is okay, but four isn't? A month is okay, three months isn't? So at the last minute they changed the language to just say "child."

They did not expect people to be dropping off 17 year olds, so they will be meeting today and are expected to change it to 72 hours or something reasonable.

I just heard an interview with the the head of Family Services for the state on NPR this morning, and he explained how the law came to be, which is something I have not heard about in most discussions of it, so I just wanted to share.

this is horrible!

I had heard a while ago about it being kind of a legal fumble. I don't know... I think 17 is probably too late to be an appropriate cut off age, but 72 hours seems much too soon.

the 3 days law is amazing has saved so many babies lives but a 14 year old?? Come on thats just too much!

Thanks for that information TS!

I think this is a good example of how important it is for the laws to be worded correctly.

Abandoning your teenage child like this can have horrible psychological consequences.

Yeah True, I remember reading that lawmakers were pretty surprised when the first older children were left. This is just one state in less than four full months - how many kids would be dumped if every state had a law like this and what's going on in American homes that families are at this point?

wow True..Its a really difficult call I can imagine. Its to bad there are so many horrible parents out there.
The more I think about it there should no-one dropping their kids off anywhere..but its that or dumping babies in dumpsters...how sad.

My suggestion would be to just make the law say "infant." That way there's no hard cut off, but no one can leave a teenager.

Thanks TS! I thought they explicitly said teenagers could be dropped off..

But still, I'm sure those parents must have known to some degree that it was intended for infants and just took full advantage of the loophole anyway. What a load of crap. Honestly even the angriest kids still long for their parents' love (probably why they're angry in the first place). I can only imagine what those teenagers must be feeling right now.

That seems like a good idea, TS.

Thanks. I just think that way, if it's a borderline case, let a judge decide instead of having to impose some arbitrary guideline. Because otherwise it's always going to be [this age] is okay but [this age plus one day] isn't?

That's so true.

Maybe they feel if they can put a number on adulthood (totally not 18 imo) they can on infants, too. Which is silly. Growth is gradual and on different levels but sigh.. law.

This is so sad. I watched an interview with one mother who dropped off her son. They were from another state. The woman stated she was afraid her son would end up dead. According to her she'd tried for years to get help for her son and didn't know what else to do.

WHAT??????????????????

IMO, this is terrible, but I think it is a reflection of the reality of what over a million job losses in a year does to a country. People are literally unable to afford to feed their own children. That was what the first man that "dumped" said, anyway.

He said that his wife had died, and then he lost his job and their insurance and he literally couldn't afford to take care of them anymore, and he hoped that with the foster system at least they would be housed and fed.

Jill-

I wholeheartedly agree. I really, really hope that Obama can turn around the economy. It just got personal, my husband said they are starting to lay people off at his company. He's safe for now though.

I cannot imagine the mental and emotional damage that is happening to these teens. My heart breaks for them.

Thanks for the clarificatons truesong I think the 72 hour things is what is on the books in Cali.

However while I think it's heidous to drop off young children, tweens, and teens in some rare cases it may be nessecary for the parent to do so. Who knows a women and a man may be prepared finacially to have a child and over the years circumstances change one parent dies, there is no other family, finacially it is almost ( it never is really impossible) impossible? (Devils Advocate)

Are all these children going into foster homes and orphanages? They can't possibly find homes for all these kids.

Bastyle, I've been trying to get my head around financially impossible and I can't. If you're a parent, you find a way. There IS help from charities, from churches, from the government - if you're not eligible for any help, that's a different problem. If you have to be homeless, you keep the kid with you; if you have to live with friends or family, you keep your kid with you.
If you're actually in imminent danger of death, and need to protect the child's life, maybe - but these are people who are aware of this law so we're likely not talking about people who are living on the street eating out of trash cans.

I think it is so sad that a law like this is even necessary. The way I see it is that you have 9 months to decide if you can provide for this baby. Give the kid up for adoption if you can't. Don't abandon it. People are so effed up.

How awful and sad. TS, I agree that 'infant' would be good language.

I am keeping my fingers crossed for your family, kranky! These are very scary times.

TS - I think your suggestion is the perfect way to word that law. Maybe you should send it along to the Nebraska legislature.

Jill-

Thanks so much! We're fine for now, and he should be OK given his position (knock on wood). It's just so terribly upsetting to know that people we know are going to lose their jobs. It's an emotional day.

(And confession: I work in employment consulting, and we've been doing a lot of lay-off analyses lately. I do not argue about economic issues for my health. I see the effects of the economy every day at work. Ladies and gents: prognosis - not good.)

I am all about derailing threads today. Sorry! Again, it's an emotional day.

I think parents are looking for an easy way out. The law was to prevent innocent babies and I'm sorry, but if you're smart enough to figure out the law's loophole and drive your kid to Nebraska, you're smart enough to put your child up for adoption.

Don't wuss out parents! And there is help, there are homeless shelters and food banks, this Christmas some of my friends and I are "sponsoring" a single mom and her children from a pregnancy care center in my city. I know times are tough...it's not an excuse though. I feel so badly for these kids and how they must feel to have their parents pick abandon them.

actually, as sad as this is, i think it's better for the children to be out of the home if the parents don't really want them. i would fear for the safety and mental health of a child who's parents wanted to get rid of them but couldn't.

we had a case here in the bay area recently where a woman starved and beat one of her adopted kids (boy girl twins) to death. the girl was in middle school and had been abused over many years. the kids were the biological children of a relative and she was raising them along with her own children. not everyone is equipped to be parents, and this poor child paid the price of that fact.

so my point is; i'm not sure staying in a home where you are constantly told and shown "you aren't wanted" is better than being given a chance to be cared for and treated kindly in a a foster home or a state run facility.

"I am all about derailing threads today."

Kranky that's my specialty!

I hate to admit that I burst into laughter when I read this story. I wonder how bad those teenagers were in the first place. I'm not saying it's right, but wow. I mean really, what did those kids do?

Oh, my heart just breaks for these kids. I don't plan on having children myself, but I'm considering adopting an older child later in my life. I see stories like this and I just want to say, "That's it! Send all of 'em to me!"

I think a major problem is that there aren't enough resources and mental health funding available to help these families out, so to them, the next best thing is to drop of "the problem" (this is more geared towards the parents who drop of their "unruly" teenagers). Infants, I can understand--it's better than dying in a dumpster.

WTF IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!

"Gee, I don't want the responsibility of this anymore. What? There's a law that let's me NOT TAKE responsibility? SWEET!"

THAT is what is WRONG with SO MUCH in this country! It is TOO EASY when you "screw up" to just say, "Eh, so what. Let someone else deal with my mistake, I'm OUT"

I'm sick and tired of it! Take responsibility for YOURSELVES people and quit thinking that someone ELSE is going to bail your a** OUT!

girlA, I agree, my rant was mostly pointed at the people dropping off the teens too.

Though, and I know I'm going to get beaten over the head for saying this, I don't like the idea of people being able to drop off babies either. I do agree though that it's better than them being murdered, either before or after birth. And if you put a baby in a dumpster and it dies, you are a murderer. Period, end of story.

Blackwidow, even the best kids out there drive parents up the walls at some point. I being raised in a different culture from this one, i see the total disrespect and disregard kids here have for any adult authority. its like the roles are reversed. you try disciplining them and your behind winds up behind bars. these are ungrateful, unruly- because- the- law- says- kids- rule. well this is the outcome of the kids rule. unruly, out of control, talk back, slap- you- around, run- away- if- i- dont- get- what- i- want, make- you- feel- guilty, call- the- cops, and get away with it all syndrome. i understand when you may not be able to afford healthcare or feed them, but there is always a way. that is no reason to abandon a kid. the teens? i think they are out of control and parents don't know how to deal. i have plans for my son when he is older. and they will not be carried out here in this country for sure.

"this Christmas some of my friends and I are "sponsoring" a single mom and her children from a pregnancy care center in my city."

That is a beautiful thing!! Very inspiring, Court.

I have a charity for homeless teens that I volunteer/give to, and this year I am trying to figure out if there is anyway to give a little extra.

I feel very badly for the abandoned children, too.

What these parents have done is appalling. May God have mercy on them, as I certainly don't.

Lickety split I completely agree with you. It was that way for my sister's kids. Dropping them off would have been better for them then staying with her. It is horrible Mykie for parents to abandon their responsibility, but it is even worse to make children pay for it.

so sad all around

How do we get in touch with the authorities there? Whodo we talk to about adopting those teens?

They're part of the system now, undave. NE's foster care system could be done by county or state--in CO, it's by county. Find out which and get in touch with their Dept of Human services. Then you get to go thru the whole fun process of foster care training and home studies.

I wonder if the state tries to contact relatives of these kids to see if they can take them. However, I'm sure if the parents could have used that option, they would have.

As far as adopting, at least here is CO, you have to foster for 6 months first, then you're eligible to file the paperwork with the court, then wait 3-6 more months for it to be final.

i heard about this more on the news the other night and it's a shame that people were taking such advantage of the law when it was in place that they now have to reneg on it. i hope that things get to be a bit better - it's not right to drop off a teen like that just because you don't want to be a parent anymore.