Get rid of your miserable job and life will feel brand new. I can't believe you've allowed yourself to be bullied and guilted into staying.

Start now. Get out your most recent resume and update it. Then go on to Careerbuilder.com, Monster.com and Craiglist and apply for 15 jobs. Do it. Then tomorrow, apply for another 15. If you have to, take a personal day from work to interview. I did it and it works.

ditto to luisa-she always has good advice.

Yes, get out of that job. Clearly it's causing you distress, which is unhealthy, and you shouldn't feel guilty about trying to improve *YOUR* life.

As for the novels, any creative endeavor is F-ING FRUSTRATING. Try starting a new project separate from the novels, as a way to work through the writer's block. Maybe some distance will give you some insight into your current work.

Okay, do NOT quit your job right now. Sorry to be debbie downer but we're in the middle of a recession! In a different market I'd tell you to throw everything to the wind!

However, there is nothing stopping you from applying to other jobs, which I agree with the others you should do.

Sometimes making big changes in our life seems so overwhelming that every time you think about it you just shut off.

Break everything down into smaller steps. Like luisa suggested, step 1 is just updating your resume. Step 2 is signing up for those career builder accts etc. Or for your book, step 1 is just sitting down and writing 200 words about something else, just to get back into the feel of it. Step 2 can be brainstorming ideas of what can come next etc.

Good luck girl. I think we all feel stuck every now and then. You'll get through it!

Bird by Bird is a great book to help you with the writer's block, although I think that will resolve itself once you get out of your rut.

I adored that book! Good suggestion.

I don't know if you exercise or not, but this would be a good time to step it up. I've been stuck in frustrating, stressful situations before and taking a long walk or burnin' up the gym has always made me feel calmer, enough to be able to rationally deal with things.

Since you already know what's making your life so miserable, take the plunge and make the changes. Being so unhappy is affecting your mental, emotional and soon your physical health. It might affect your marriage at some point. If you stay this bitter, you're going to end up on anti-depressants and maybe in the loony bin or both.

I do agree that you need to find another job first, until your novels take off. You know what changes you want, so make them. Don't over think everything, sometimes you have to take a risk. If you don't try you'll always wonder, 'why didn't I or what if I would have'. If it doesn't work out, you're no worse off. Then you move on to something else. You'll like and respect yourself for taking charge of your life. Right now, you're letting other people run your life.

Things have a way of working out. Reach for the stars and GO FOR IT!! What do you have to lose?

Um, this is your livelyhood, don't let anyone dictate that but you. But seriously, how do you get a guilt trip over staying at a crappy job? Oh, wait, stop being a pushover!

I know exactly how you feel, I've applied to at least over 25 jobs (since May, when I graduated from college). I would like to at least start paying for my student loans (which I've taken out more than I've needed to...partly to help fix my parents financial mistakes), and it would be great if I could pay off my credit card which I used for school as well. But so far I haven't had luck with a job, and it doesn't look like I'll be starting school again any time soon, considering I can hardly pay to take the GRE's or even for application fees, let alone when I do get in, how I would pay for tuition or books... In addition, I would love to even move out, considering the increasing stressfulness of living at "home" (I'm constantly reminded that I don't belong here. So yes, I understand how it is to feel stuck. And be a pushover. As for the job...be happy you have a job. I have a BA and not even retail will hire me, I'm just about ready to try Wall-mart...or even McDonalds or Burger King... If I were you, I'd take it slow, step back, evaluate your position and find a place to start and move forward.

I agree with most others. absolutely hammer the job market til you find something else (probably better paid) and get the hell out. Then start rewriting your book and enjoying your life. I was guilt tripped into staying in a job with an abusive boss for many years and didnt know myself when i left!

You can do it

~Gem

Obviously, getting out of a dead-end job is number one. Two, join a writer's critique group. I'm also a writer and I could not have gotten anywhere without their input and feedback. They always inspire me to keep going. Surround yourself with people who are going to inspire and motivate you, especially with people who have a common endeavor. Reading other novels always gets me "unstuck" when it comes to writing. Good luck!

I agree with the others who say the job is number one, look for something you will enjoy and you will be so much better for it!

Keep this job for now, but explore your options...

take care of yourself, and I truly think that everything else falls into place...

Quitting your job may sound like a great idea, but if you're feeling stuck like you say - it's not going to be easy.

Find a job that DOES sound interesting - and apply. Heck, find a handful of them and go on interviews. When one does come along that you like and that offers you a job (with better pay, hopefully!), then go ahead and take it. It's easier to jump when you know that you'll have something to catch you.

And, although I'm not much of a writer, dont just trash your work on a whim... give it time and something will create inspiration for you. Just remember to keep a pen & paper handy when it does!

Good luck,
cptnruthless

Don't allow your boss, company or coworkers to pressure you into staying somewhere where you really are not happy. Start job hunting and find something better. Then give your 2 weeks. Make yourself and your happiness and your future your #1 priority in life. Good luck to you.

I had to quit a daycare job once and I didn't give notice because I knew she would treat me miserably during the last two weeks. When I called to tell her I was quitting, she was in the middle of changing a diaper and actually started screaming and swearing at me (like, the VERY dirty ones) on the phone. She guilt tripped me for leaving after her husband's cancer had come back. She also eviscerated me for being "disloyal" to her. I cried for an hour after I got off the phone cause I felt to awful, but now I see how completely wrong it was for her to treat me like that. I didn't owe her anything; an employer has to make allowances for situations where an employee has to quit. My point is: put in your two weeks notice (or just quit) and don't feel bad. It's not personal; it's just business.