Dear Sugar,

Lately, I've noticed that when I am out with a group of girls, the men I meet are always attracted to the girls in the group who are both pretty and rude to them. This really bothers me because I am pretty (I think), friendly, and I treat people well, but it seems like guys would much rather be treated badly and try to win over the girl who is not interested in them. It's such a double standard because I always hear guys say that it's the girls who look for the jerky guy! I feel like this will lead me to being single forever and I don't know what to do. I'm debating whether to start being a jerk in order to get a few more dates. — Bothered by This Behavior Beth

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Dear Bothered by This Behavior Beth,

I don't blame you for being bothered, but I guess men are just as complicated as women after all! While I understand the attraction to the chase, those kinds of relationship don't commonly work out. Being rude to others isn't an attractive quality, so while these mean girls might be getting the guys initially, I can almost guarantee that being nice will get you much farther.

Having a successful date isn't always easy, but I advise you against changing your personality in hopes of having one. Keep doing what you're doing and when the time is right, I'm sure you'll meet someone that appreciates the person you really are. Good luck.

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