I'm sorry that is just uncalled for. I would be grabbing some of his clothes, throwing them and his keys at him and tell him to sleep in the car.

I would say its time for a serious talk. Porn is awesome to enjoy together but if he is choosing it over me then there is a serious problem. I would ask him to tell me what he wants and ask him if he is attracted to me. Sex is very important in a relationship and if the attraction/connection is gone then the relationship is over.

My ex had a problem with this. He even did it at work! Try talking to him, but if nothing like that works, he may need counseling. Or you could just decide you won't put up with it if he won't/can't change.

Disclaimer: I think nothing's wrong with porn once in a while. I even like to watch it occasionally myself! But when it's being used to the exclusion of willing girlfriend, there may be some kind of compulsion involved. Good luck!

I'd say:
"See ya later masturbater!"

Start packing his stuff to let him go somewhere and reconsider his priorities. And see where it goes from there.

Ouch. I'd probably have a talk with him, find out what it is that is missing from the relationship that porn fulfills and see if there's something he'd like to try, etc. that he didn't want to bring up. If he can't be open to the discussion though, its time to leave.

I'd probably try to initiate sex with him, if he's watching porn it must mean he's horny and if it's in the middle of the night he probably didnt want to wake me. But, if he shot me down at that point and made an excuse not to have sex I would break up with him. Obviously, he's just not that into me anymore.

I'm with psterling. I have nothing against porn, it can greatly enhance sex, but using porn as a substitute is not right.

Counseling. If he refuses to do couples counseling, we "take a break". Or break up. I just went through a situation just like this, but without the porn, and the consequences were the same... I'd imagine I'd feel the same if the porn was there or not - it's a terrible feeling to be rejected, and since we always watched that stuff together, I'd have felt even worse about it... a very bad sign.

haha, k8.

i'd be pissed. it would definitely be time for a serious talk about what's going on. he couldn't expect to get away with ditching me for porn.

As a guy, I think that this is really uncalled for. I can't even image the pain that my girl would feel if I did that to her. That being said, I do know some guys that avoid sex with their partners for a few different reasons. Either because they still feel embarrassed about their performance, or sexually their needs aren't fulfilled.

I experienced this scenario firsthand. He was embarassed, but his increase in having "real" sex never improved. He just wasn't into having sex with me.

Today when I was flipping through channels I caught an episode of the Tyra Show and it was about sex addiction. There was a man who wouldn't have sex with his wife (newlyweds) and she said she was going out, the place was closed so she came back and walked in on him doing this. Apparently it was because he was exposed to porn at eight years old. So who knows what his reasoning is? If its becoming a huge problem then counseling is probably the way to go, if its a new relationship then.. he might not be interested in you? Maybe the spark is gone and its time to rethink the relationship.

depends who it is. my beau now wouldnt dare, he barely watches it with me let alone on his own. so it wouldnt be an issue

but a new beau? kick his ass to the street. not worth it. I would not be interested in fixing anyone.

I would ask him the sex was REALLY that bad.

I'd chat to him and ask him to stop but if he didn't he'd be up dookie creek without a paddle.

Candace - lots of kids "accidentally" see porn at a young age - that's not an excuse for him. How ridiculous! I know you're repeating what you saw on the show, but that's like saying because I read a sexy romance novel with steamy love scenes at age 9, I'm a sex addict. My ex saw porn when he was little and he wasn't addicted to porn... it happens, with kids who have older brothers or negligent parents...

I know sometimes I masturbate (although it's sans porn due to my fertile imagination ) when I can't sleep, or when I'm stressed, even if the boyfriend is available, and I know he does the same sometimes. This sounds a little different though, and you need to sit down for a most likely awkward talk about it. It may be that he's just gotten lazy - a lot of times it's quicker and easier, although not nearly as enjoyable, to get off yourself rather than have sex, but not constantly.

Maybe you could try putting on a sexy video and initiating things with him - it doesn't even have to be porn (personally, I like "Unfaithful" with Diane Lane and Richard Gere since it's a thriller and has good sex scenes, both of which get me going).

I think it would be time for a discussion. Then again my boyfriend will watch porn "casually" like he'll open it up in a separate window or something when he's on the net. He actually spends FAR LONGER looking for the porn than actually jerking it to the porn. I am fairly sure he only watches porn when I am in the room anyway.

I don't think I would care all that much. It depends on the kind of porn I guess? If he was getting up in the middle of the night to jerk it to seriously messed up porn then we'd have an issue. Otherwise I'd just guilt trip him about it for weeks.

I walked in on my ex jerking it to 4chan when I came back home early one day. That was pretty hilarious.

Princess, I agree it wasn't a good excuse at all:) haha. Especially these days, almost every kid has seen some kind of porn by that age or atleast a nude picture. There were a few other things people had said on the show I cant really remember.. but that guy's situation was just unfortunate he couldn't watch a scene on TV with characters kissing without having to.. relieve himself.

Assuming I wanted to work it out, I would ask if I could watch it with him. Then, I would try to work some real life situations into the movie. Try some of the things they were doing, or ask if he would like me to do that or wear that. Porn should be used to enhance a relationship, not substitute for it. Give it some time and understanding, maybe he has performance concerns or other issues. However, after a while and if it did not change, I would break-up to find someone who wanted to be with me rather than a computer.