This past weekend I asked you all to share a moment in your life when you felt as if you'd hit rock bottom. There were some amazing stories, and it was so inspiring to hear how some of you had made it through all the stronger. But I also feel for those of you in the midst of a low point right now, so I want to take this opportunity to share some of my advice for how to cope with such a difficult time. If this is something you're struggling with right now, check out my tips when you read more.
- Perhaps the most difficult part about hitting rock bottom is admitting it. For many people, acknowledging this low point is basically the same as saying they've let their life spin out of control, which can feel very dispiriting. But if you don't admit it, you'll never be able to fight through it.
- It's OK to be scared. Once you realize you need to put your life back together, the climb to the top can seem terrifying. Learning to keep trying even when you're scared is half the battle.
- Fear can be very defeating, but don't give up. Change doesn't happen overnight, but if you stick with it, eventually you'll get the results you long for.
- They call it rock bottom because you can only go up from there, so start with baby steps. Create small goals for yourself and as you succeed, make them larger. And of course, whenever you achieve a goal, no matter how small it may seem, take a moment to pat yourself on the back.
- Finally, reach out for support from others. Obviously friends and family are a great resource, but if you can't go to them, consider a therapy group or even an online forum. Sometimes just knowing that others understand you makes all the difference in the world.
As impossible as it seems right now, you will make it past this rough patch! For those of you who have, please feel free to provide your best advice in the comments below.
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One thing that got me through a real rough patch this year was every night I would think of 3 good things that happened to me that day. Even if it was just getting to work on time, or even just getting out of bed. Its helps you to start thinking positively and actually start seeing the good things that are happening around you instead of focusing on the bad.
1The last several years of my life have included some serious rock bottoms (death of my sons father, sons cancer diagnosis, my MS diagnosis, loss of job at the time, and death of grandmother) , but I didn't let myself fall there. Life just took me there without my permission and I had no control over it. Just realize that you are still alive for a greater reason and that no matter how bad it gets, you don't stay in the same place forever. This too shall pass.
2I write poetry and just whatever comes to mind really...
nearly a 1000 poems later... I don't hate anyone anymore
I may not like 'em. But I wouldn't react with violence or anything.
I let go easier too. I've been through nearly everything so I just write it down, drop it in that 'to-go box' and keep walking.
It's simple, now. But you don't want to know what it took internally to get here, so don't let my cut-and-dry 'tude fool you. Hitting rock bottom is falling to the earth from the clouds, if you walk away or even get carried away to recuperate...you done good.
3Hiding55, that's a great ideia! When I go to bed I'm most likely thinking about something that went wrong that day, even when some good things happened too. So, I'm giving that a try!
Being positive is key, I think, and allowing oneself to celebrate little victories, instead of thinking about how much is left to achieve. Baby steps!
4Amen sourcherry!!
5What really helped me was reading many, MANY self-help books - along with spending time with family and close friends. One book that I would recommend - seriously! Go get it right now! - is called "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay. It's just...there really aren't words to describe this incredibly phenomenal book. It's like having a therapist, best friend, cozy grandmother, security blanket, all rolled into one. Trust me, you can turn your life around. I know it may seem like you can't, but sometimes it's your own perceptions of the situation that may be inhibiting you from growing past this painful period.
6I have started going to counseling, and on the first day, my counselor told me we could go as slow or as fast as I want. I pretty much answered "No, I'm ready to pour," and we got to work. I definitely get anxious when I think about how much of me needs to be put back together, but the thought of finding some kind of relief is the best in my opinion. Realizing how often I can be mean to myself or negative in general is Step 1.
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