We all know that boys will be boys, but when they are in a relationship, time with the guys becomes all the more important. Just as women need alone time with their friends, men desire the same interaction. But I've noticed a common theme when my girlfriends tell me about their significant others' nights out: they're constantly up to no good, drinking too much, staying out too late, and spending too much money. Of course it's their life and they can live it however they see fit, but when it compromises their girlfriends' feelings, something has to change. So ladies, how do you feel when your significant other goes out with the guys? Is it a cause for contention, or are you a supporter of boys' night out?
Napo Shop
Tom Tailor
Milly
I love guys night out. I can finally watch all my DVRed Project Runway episodes.
1i'd hate if a boyfriend told me to tone down or cut out girl's nights all together & if that happened, i'd have to think long & hard & i'd probably be out the door. sooo, boys nights are fine by me.
2As boys mature into men...boy's night becomes sitting around a grilling chewing the fat lying about their jobs or watching the game at the last single one's apartment...if he's still going out to bars/clubs and not griping about how expensive the drinks are...he's too immature to even care about a woman's feelings. In a committed relationship I absolutely encourage men's night out...like Monday' said... I get a break from him to do my girly stuff. A great thing to do is one female and one male sponsor that night at their place on the same nights...then everyone's happy.
3*a grill...oops...
4My boyfriend barely drinks and hates to spend money at clubs. His buddies on the other hand get totally trashed, spend hundreds of dollars and dance like idiots. My man is always babysitting his buddies so I trust him completely. I know he never does anything wrong so I encourage his nights out with the boys. Gives me a chance to hang with my girls and catch up on my "Me" time!
5I encourage it! I trust my fiance, and I like his friends. He's a man, not a little boy, and I'm not about to put restrictions on his independence. As zabrow said, I'd hate it if he put restrictions on me. Besides, it's important to have some time away with just your friends (or just yourself) to maintain your sense of self within the relationship. I guess it boils down to this for me -- if I can't trust him, why would I be with him?
6Last time my boyfriend had "guys night" we did get into a bit of a fight, but only because he kept calling me and texting me being a drunken fool and it was pissing me off.
Other than that, his friends like me and my friends like him, so its honestly never really a
problem for us to all just go out together.
7I don't mind...my bf's idea of a boy's night is going to the hockey game or concert with his friends, and having a few beers during dinner or afterwards at a Pub. I trust him 150%. And he always tells me what happens the next day without me asking ...stories like how his friend did this....
8i don't mind it, but i feel better about it when it's just watching the game at a buddy's apartment versus going out to a club
9My guy just has no interest in that sort of thing. If he wanted to out all the time with the guys I'd think it was a little weird. But occasionally it wouldn't bug me.
10GO... no really GO... we're married so maybe it's a little different for, but even when we were single... GO... (gives me some time to myself)
11Indeed. GO! And stay out longer for all I care!
Funny this was mentioned today; last night was the first night in MONTHS that my beau went out with the guys, leaving me to my own devices. Granted -I hit the gym, got some chinese food, watched my TV shows, and played video games for a couple hours... but it was so peaceful.
The second he got home, he was like "lookatthis, watareyawatchin, whendidyougethome, ididthis, didyoumissme, yapyapyap..." My reply? "So, is this gonna be an every Wednesday thing, or... when you going out again?"
I really miss the "me" time I had when I was single. :/
12Oh, I don't know. I really like to control my man and make him stay home with me, doing crafts and never let him see his friends anymore. It's really healthy.
13I love when my husband goes out because i get some alone time and catch up on shows and movies i want to watch.
14you girls are nuts. boys tell me all the time what happens during guys night. hell, just the other day, a married (hot) colleague told me about how it's his wife's worst nightmare when he goes out with his single friends and single brother. his wife is smart! i know some people trust their man and should, but some of you are ignoring the possibility that guys night = open season on girls! hello!
15I could care less if my fiance wants to have a guy's night out. It is selfish and petty to say that he can't go out and have fun because it "makes me feel bad." Grow up.
16Go out, have fun, I trust him completely. there are rules of course. no drinkin and drivin, no strip clubs (not because i care about him looking at nekkid women, but because he spends to much money there)
17It's all about trust...if you trust your guy then Boys' Night really shouldn't be an issue.
18bluestar... you're hilarious!
19Every one needs time with friends!
20it's great. boys night is welcome as long as it's not every night. why have a grlfriend if you don't want to spend time with her? otherwise, you can't be afraid of what is going to happen when you're not there. if he acts like he's single in the club, you'll wise up and leave his ass.
21i'm in favor of it.
22if i have girls' night, he should be allowed guys' night.
it's only fair.
and my guy's level headed.
i trust him not to make stupid mistakes
huge supporter of guy night although my husband's idea of a "guys night" is very different than my ladies nights. I'll go out with my girlfriends and see a movie or go to a nice club and have a drink and dance to a few songs. my husband will curl up on the couch and watch a movie with a beer and some popcorn or tinker on his car. I'd like it more if he'd go out and socialize with his guy buddies but I can't tell him he has to do that q:
23I don't mind. Besides, I have more Girl's Night Outs than he has Boy's Night Out. And his "boys only" thing is usually playing Mario Cart and drinking beer, while I often go with the girls to a club.
24If I don't trust him enough for a guys' night out, then we shouldn't be together. End of story.
25Amen queenegg:
and skigirl: "i know some people trust their man and should, but some of you are ignoring the possibility that guys night = open season on girls! hello!"
Um, of course I trust my husband. I wouldn't have married him if I didn't ... and if he is going to cheat, he doesn't need a "boys night out" to do it (work? gym? etc)
26and LOL at the strip club thing, Catepillar Girl
27i love it when my boyfriend goes out with his friends! he's just in a better mood overall!
28I totally think guy's night is a good idea. Although I love being with my boyfriend, I'd want him to have some time to kick back with his friends while I am with mine.
If you can't trust your significant other to make the right decisions when he/she's out on the town, you really shouldn't be in the relationship with that person anyways...
29Deidre, couldn't have said it better myself!
30runningesg - of course you trust him. everyone on here is saying they trust their man. i'm just saying that statistics show that some of you shouldn't!
one out of every 2.7 men in america have cheated on his wife. that's huge considering the other 1.7 are probably ugly and unable anyway
honestly, i trust my boyfriend right now too, but i have had other boyfriends that i haven't, and while i pretended i did, i knew deep down something was up and something was...just saying
31Skigurl "i know some people trust their man and should, but some of you are ignoring the possibility that guys night = open season on girls! hello!"
Um...there is no possibility my bf is like that. He has great morals, is loyal to a fault...I have full confidence in him.
I have PROBABLY dated guys like that but run the other way when they exhibit *sshole behaviour...you find out pretty early on which guys are like that and which guys aren't.
32bluestar... lol
Boys' night is totally fine with me. I trust him and he knows his limits.
33I don't know skigurl...perhaps I am naive...but i don't think I would go through a relationship thinking they MAY cheat on me. Statistics do not encompass the entire truth..I just never trust them because so much more needs to be looked at other than just the results...
a) where (geographically) is the sample taken
b) how do you determine a control group as normal behaviour on a guys night out since our standards of measurement of what is ok are all different
c) how big is the sample size?
d) If it is a national survey, how many percentage of people responded? And of that percentage, what is the break down of age, geography?
e) How is the question asked?
f) Who did the survey? Would they have anything to prove or sell? If not..do their parent companies...
g) How many times a week do the repondents go out a week without their spouses
h) Do they do think they have a good relationship with their spouses
g) Have they been divorced
Sorry if I seem like I am questioning your thinking Skigurl, you make really valid points, I am just in the business of working with stats and etc alot ..since I am in PR and I have been trained not to just look at stats at face value..
34Indeed, CYL.
In fact, 23% of statistics are false.
35ahha okay ladies, i see what you're saying, but what i'm saying is, not one person came onto this forum and said 'i know they're a necessary evil but i don't really like boys nights because i know the way boys can be when they're out with their single male friends'
out of the 20+ people who have commented, someone is getting cheated on, and no one would be the person to admit it!
i am one of the only people who said i feel BETTER when it's not a club scene and rather is just a night in watching hockey and grilling steaks....it's not that i don't trust my bf, cuz i honestly do (this one particular bf in my life is a good one) but it still doesn't mean sh*t doesn't go down in a bar that i wouldn't approve of. flirting and dancing and whatnot can happen to ANYONE! it happens to me when i go out with the girls, and i am sure if my bf witnessed it, he wouldnt love it...so i'm just SAYING how ironic it is that everyone on here is just gushing over trust.
36obviously i'm bored at work and may be beating a dead horse, so don't mind me....and i'm going out of town in about 10 minutes so you can argue all you want but i won't be around to fight back for a bit
37LMAO skigurl...same boat..but I am procrastinating a contract.
But yes skigurl, I think sometimes we women don't want to see the truth, but we ultimately know deep down if something is going down, we just don't like to see it.
38I don't think there is anything wrong with a boys night, just like we need time to bond with our friends they need time as well. It's healthy to spend some time apart, if you were around each other all the time you would go crazy.
my fiance is going on on a boys night tomorrow for the first time in awhile so i'm quite happy knowing i'll have the place to myself and like Monday and Said have mentioned, i can catch up on my shows on DVR. It's a win win for all.
39skigurl, I absolutely HATE the way my fiance acts around his friends, but it makes him SO HAPPY and he loves being with them so much, that I gladly shove him out the door in their direction with a backpack full of beer and fruit snacks. He gets to do boy things and play with his pals, and I get to do... whatever I want! Which is usually read a book, catch up on my girly TV shows, or eat ice cream/cheesecake/something fattening and delicious for dinner.
Besides, I always get a ton of cute, sweet messages about how much he misses me and likes me. Who doesn't love it when that happens?
40I have never worried about a boyfriend going out for boys night and cheating on me. I think most people who cheat find someone at work or somewhere they can develop a meaningful connection. And I don't really know what you can do about that...
41ALL FOR IT! If you have a semi-normal, trusting relationship, there should be no harm. I look forward to my gal nights, he needs to have his guy nights.
42At first the thing what bothered me was him staying out WAY later than he planned, drinking WAY more than he planned and most importantly *driving afterwards* (of course he didn't PLAN to drink - yeah, right!). Now it doesn't bother me at all because he is under strict injunction to use a cab and leave his car wherever - I really don't mind the drinking and staying up once in a while as long as he's not driving. As for the trust issue, I got none and never did.
Oh yeah - and if I decide to stay out till whatever time with my friends, he hates it, but can't say anything at all because I am so cool with his going out once in a while. Ha ha! Forward thinking!
43I have no issue with him going out with his friends, he just doesn't. We're not the "going out and drinking" types.
44Definitely not opposed to boys' night. I'd be a little more concerned if they were going to a club though...
45LOL LOL at said8me and bluestar.
bijou boheme: "if he acts like he's single in the club, you'll wise up and leave his ass." I totally agree.
I'm all for a boys night, but not in a partying, drinking, going crazy sort of way. As long as he remembers and cares about the fact that he has a gf, it's all good. If he doesn't, I'm gone.
46Im totally for boys' nights. I dont like them so much because I have terrible trust issues, but it makes my boyfriend so happy and deep down I do trust him. Its not really him I dont trust, its his buddies he goes out with. Some of them I dont mind when he goes out with them, but the others still havent quite grown up yet (heck, some of them dont even have a job for god's sake! all they do is go out and get wasted and do different girls everynight).
Luckily, he barely ever goes out because an ideal night for him is sitting down all night playing his video games
What I dont get is why everyone on here need their man to leave in order to be able to have "me" time? or watch their favorite show? or whatever else was mentioned? I can easely do all of this even if my boyfriend is home!
47i thikn that it's fine for there to be a boys night and i always encourage my fiance to go out with his boys when the opportunity comes up. we think that they are doing crazy things, but in my experience, they are just drinking beer, playing cards or doing something equally mundane, they aren't out at clubs doing insane crazy things.
48It's been quite a rough experience with me, because of my trust issues from my past experiences, which made me sometimes a little controlling, which made him fear telling me what he did with his buddies, eventually doing disrespectful things (smoking behind my back, searching for women on Craigslist)... so I realized that my trust issues from the past shouldn't influence my current relationship and as hard as it is for me to trust him now based on what he has already done (he never cheated on me, but he did lie numerous times), I honestly HAVE to trust him if I want this to work.
No matter what, he is his own individual and he is free to do whatever he wants to do, and me putting restrictions will only make him want to rebel and not value the relationship he's currently in.
So it's a behavioural change from both of us, I have to accept, understand and trust him and he has to appreciate that and respect our relationship by not doing stupid things.
49it always bewilders me how women assume that men think like them and that a boys night out is just like a night out with the girls - if only they knew! i've been out on some boys nights out and away on shoots with men from work and its always the ones you think are the most family-committed guys and wonderful husbands and dads that are chatting up the girls and trying to get lucky. it makes me laugh when women say 'oh, my man isn't like that, he'd never cheat on me'...although i suppose its nice if you can believe that. anyway, i think nights out doing things together with the lads are healthy and guys should go out when they want really but nights out clubbing, coming home past midnight, etc will always spell trouble girls!
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