My boyfriend and I have been together for about 3 years and recently have been talking about marriage. There seems to be one big problem though DOGS. I've always had dogs and absolutely love them. My boyfriend on the other hand pretty much despises them, he thinks they smell, are dirty, and belong outside. He said he would never allow a dog in his home, and even owning an outside dog would be a stretch. I can't imagine never owning a dog, or even having to keep one outside. I know this seems like a petty issue, but I think it could turn out to be a huge problem in the long run. What do I do? Could this possibly break up our relationship?
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Tory Burch
Marni
J Brand
Being a pet lover myself, I don't think this is a petty issue at all!! For me it would be a big deal! If I ever had to choose between a guy and my pets, the guy would have to go (seriously!!) I had a boyfriend before I met the love of my life who totally didn't get my, pets so I always had to hang out at his apartment instead of mine. It's one of the reasons I'm not with him anymore! Luckily my current boyfriend loves animals and knows how much they mean to me. I think you need to find out more about what turns him off so much regarding dogs. Is he secretly scared of them? Did he know someone who had one who didn't look after it properly and their house was a mess? I think you need to expose him to some more well cared for and well behaved pooches (do you have any friends with sweet doggies?). Tell him you will always keep the dog bathed, groomed and that you don't mind the extra work of caring for a home that has pets. I think if it really means a lot to you and he's not willing to budge then this could be a problem. A pet person with a non pet person can cause some major friction! I hope you can work this out if he's a great guy in other respects...good luck!
1The issue about the dogs isn't necessarily important in and of itself. The important part is how you two handle this impasse. Marriage and relationships are inherently about compromise, and what I see is two people putting their foot down about something without trying to reach a middle ground.
And what a middle ground is in this case, I'm not sure. Perhaps it is an outside only dog. And would that be awful? Pay attention to how you both behave during this dicussion as it will likely be how you both behave during your future lifetime of disagreements. If you can't compromise about this, then I don't think you're likely to be well suited to each other in the future.
2I had to give my precious cat away 2 months ago
She was like a baby to me, and I got married.
My husband is allergic to cats. I had no choice but to give Callie to my mom. But at least I know she has a good home, and I get to see her when I want to 
3if you think it's a huge issue then it is. hard to believe that this just came up after 3 years.
that being said, my bet is that he would fall in love with whatever dog you got pretty quickly and it would become "his dog". you do need to take him at his word though and rule out dogs if you plan on marriage.
4When I wanted to get my first dog (before we were married and living together) he said it was fine as long as it was an outdoor dog and I told him hell no. Now we have two, which are hogging the furniture as I type this. Some guys can change their mind. My husband had just never had a dog before and didn't understand that making them part of the family is wonderful. On the other hand, I firmly believe that the way a person treats animals speaks volumes about their character.
5I think it could be a deal breaker.
I like dogs, but they can be smelly, expensive (vet bills, etc) and be a huge responsibility, that I don't want at this time in my life.
I don't think this makes me a bad person. Some people are childless by choice, but it doesn't mean they hate children, just they choose not to have the responsibility.
I don't know, Good Luck!
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6"All my life, I wanted to be someone, I guess I should have been more specific." Jane Wagner
I agree 120% with grl in the world, there is prob some sort of bad experience he has had with dogs. I was NOT a dog person then my ex got our now chocolate lab and I cannot imagine my life without him! Sometimes people come around, give him a chance to see that!
7I hope he comes around. It would be very hard to live your life without something that means so much to you. I personally would not see this as any different than a difference of wanting to have children or not.
8I agree with controlledspin. I really hope he comes around. Personally, it would be a HUGE problem for me if the guy I liked had a problem with dogs or animals in general. How did you guys deal with it in the 3 years you were together?? I agree with doing some investigating and finding out why he feels this way about dogs. Lots of luck to you!!
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9This would be a huge deal breaker for me. I do not want childern and my dog is my child. He sleeps with me and I take him almost everywhere. I do not think an animal can be an outside animal only. That is incredibly unfair to the animal, it can freeze to death, can suffer from heat exhaustion, or be stolen. Hopefully, he can move past this and learn to love them as much as you do otherwise I think there will be a lot of problems.
10Not really advice but experience. I have had dogs since before I can remember, my husband on the other hand had a dog but it was outside in a kennel where it had no attention from anyone. When we got serious I point blankly told him "you will have to get used to the idea of a dog in the house. I love dogs and don't think I could live happily without one." We got a puppy, he actually approved it (didn't fight it), fell in LOVE with her. There were a few boundaries at first, he didn't want her on the bed or anything like that. I took her to obedience school. Well, now she is allowed on the bed (but she doesn't sleep with us) and we got a second dog!!! LOL He had bad experiences with dogs and didn't truly realize how they are a part of the family. He wouldn't give Storm up for the world.
11I think you would both need to compromise and eventually he will come around. If he doesn't then I think you would have to decide "dog" or "boyfriend".
i agree with sticky. they always say u can judge a man by how they treat animals, children and their mothers. i could not be with someone who was not an animal lover. my mom runs an spca and its a given we are given the grossest pyscho non adoptable pets she has at the time lol
12I think Kiwi has good advice, people tend to come around to ADORABLE SWEET puppies. But if he didn't...that would be a HUGE deal breaker for me. I have always had dogs and I even volunteer at a shelter b/c I love them so much. My fiancee and I treat our dog Beans like our kid! (We aren't having kids for a LONG time, so she gets spoiled rotten!) I also would be upset at his unwillingness to compromise as that could be an indicator of future problems to come, especially if you had kids. If he is worth not having a pet though, I would suggest working at your local shelter, it is so rewarding and I get to see the sweetest dogs all the time.
13I have never had a bad experience with dogs, but I don't like them at all. I agree- they're dirty, smelly, and I can't stand how people treat them like children. It all depends on how important owning a dog is to you. If ownign a dog is more important than being with him, break up with him.
14Aww, Sweet C! You guys are good people looking after the forgotten pets that no one else wants! Your mom must be a sweetheart!
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