I've never been a romance novel reader, but I see plenty of ladies reading this stuff on my commute. (I'd love to see a dude whip out a Harlequin Romance now and then.) Is the writing really this bad? I can't tell if these are real first lines or parodies of first lines. Either way, choose your "favorite." It's gonna be hard. Click here for more stinkers.
S***r
Esprit
Antik Batik
Are these real?
1I guess if they are, I like it classic and oh so sober: "I was a dark and horny night..."
It's so refreshing to know that bi-partisan boning is alive and well.
2These can not be real! If so...I need to read the books!!!
3People get paid for writing this stuff. Where do I sign up?
4Those are all so bad ...seriously these are from books?!
5If these are real, I think I could write a better book.....
6
...where do i find books like these? i like the first one.....
7These are not real. Its really just plain sad if anyone ever even thought they were. People who write romances would never down grade themselves to writing the word horny in such context. Each is just plain idiotic.
8Thanks for the LOL!!!
9Oh, Adriall. Play along, please!
10these are not real, lol. but my mom loved these! my dad called them her "crotch novels". the wording was something like this "he held her close against his muscled body, and she felt his desire for her rise up. her loins ached from wanting him, needing him..." the first time i read the jacket i was shocked
then my dad and i use to laugh our asses off at them. she'd hide the books to avoid our
ridicule 
11Crotch novels!
I think someone needs to alert the Harlequin marketing dept. PRONTO. Time for
some rebranding! 
12crotch novels....thats a good one..
...wait till hubby hears about that one.....mine just calls
them my *how to books*..
13Fuzzles wins the thread..again.
These were..uh...disconcerting, Giggle.
14It was a tough one, but I went with the first one. It really sets the tone for romantical mayhem without being too revealing.
15Its hard to choose which ones the worst
16It was a tossup between "His flatulence reared up like a proud stallion," and "He smelled of pork. Rotting pork, in fact — and lots of it."
I chose the first. I been around horse farts, I want none of that in my romanace novels, thank you very much.
Yes, this lesbian chick reads hetero romance novels; they are my popcorn books.
17I don't mean to be a poor sport with my previouse comment but still.........- _ -
18I was kinda PMSing as well when I commented on this. Otherwise I would have found some humor in this post. I enjoy other posts, unfortunate names is one of the best!!!!!!!!!!
19It would be a happy ending story when the first line is:
His flatulence reared up like a proud stallion!!! Woohoo!!! =)
20-end of message
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