Dear Sugar,

A few years ago I met a guy who quickly became my best friend; in fact, he was really the best thing that ever happened to me. In the beginning we were just inseparable, great friends. But months later, I realized I was in love with him. Soon after, he admitted that he loved me, too, and we started dating. It was amazing at first, but within a few months we started fighting a lot. We eventually broke up, but stayed really good friends. We tried getting back together but it didn't work, and we ended up down the same road.

Finally, we stopped talking for about six months, until one night he called me and said that he just wanted us to be friends again. So we started talking, and within a month he was talking about a girl he'd met. I tried to be casual about it, but every time he mentioned her I felt extremely jealous. It wasn't before long that I figured out that there was something really special between them. After talking about how strong his feelings for her are I finally snapped, and threatened to never speak to him again. He was upset by my outburst, and we haven't talked since.

I only lashed out at him for attention, and now I can't stop thinking about him. I wish I had just dealt with it because now I can't let go of him. I love him, and I have to do everything in my power to get him back. I need him in my life. But he wants nothing to do with me, and is crazy about this other girl. What should I do now?

— Needy Naila

To see DearSugar's answer, .

Dear Needy Naila,

I know you're not going to want to hear this, but it's pretty clear to me that it's time for you to let go. There's no point in waiting around for a relationship that's already proven itself to be unsuccessful time and time again. Maybe now is your chance to ask what you can do just for you instead of trying to figure out what you can do to please him. A crush should always come secondary to your mental well-being, and if it's not that means there's a problem.

If this is affecting your life to the extent that you're having a difficult time coping with the day-to-day stuff, try talking to a therapist. Sometimes having an objective listener will help you process the emotions you've been ruminating in for the past few months. Also, an outside voice may allow you to see the situation more clearly. Try writing a letter to your ex expressing everything that you wish you could say to his face, but don't send it. Instead, give your emotions a release. And don't forget to confide in your family and friends; they're there for support.

Source [1]