Don't sleep with people you work with. Other than that it is not their business so just ignore it, pretend you didn't hear them, or just simply say you don't want to talk about it.

Here's an idea: don't do things that make you feel so ashamed you feel you have to hide the truth.

Just say "I don't kiss and tell". If your friends keep bringing it up just say "Seriously, it's not your business" and move on.

I get the feeling in your post that you want people to know though.

How dense are you? "he doesn't want others to know either"? He already told!! Besides, it doesn't mean anything, you're just some chick he has sex with.

At this point since your partner opened his big mouth I don't really see the point in denying it. He obviously wanted people to know otherwise he never would have said anything to his friend. In the future you need to learn to be a little more discreet and not sleep with people you work with. People are not as stupid as you would like to think. It doesn't take much for people to figure it out.

This is why you dont sleep with people you work with- and if you agreed to keep it under wraps then he is a jerk for telling his friend.

Beyond that, if someone is rude enough to actually ask you- simply say, "I dont know what youre talking about" and leave it at that. I made a similar mistake in college and I heard that people knew, but no one ever said anything to me. Only reason I was actually concerned about people knowing was bc he had a completely psychotic ex that started showing up again and I didnt want HER to know I had hooked up with her ex- she had been fired for picking fights with customers and had a violent temper.

Oh, get over it - if you sleep with someone in your circle it is bound to come out, sooner than you might think. Only way to avoid everyone knowing is to start seeing someone outside of work/ friends/ their friends.

Secrets, secrets are no fun unless you share with... well, don't share. Firstly, I agree with the people who are discouraging at work/in circle affairs. It seldom ends well. But I don't think accusing this poor girl of bad judgment is what she's asking for, just a bit of help. Having been in similar situations, I can tell you that denying it is pointless. If you don't have feelings for this guy, just shrug it off. Do what the others have said by ignoring their pleas for information and discouraging their prying with "my personal life is not your concern." Also, you should probably mention to the guy that you know he told his friend. Don't expect any sort of grieving apology. If this is truly a casual affair, you should be able to discuss things in a casual way. If you're uncomfortable with people knowing, then you probably should not sleep with him again. But, trust me, gossip is a mosquito bite: annoying for a while, but forgettable once something more pressing happens. Flavor of the minute. It will blow over.

work + sex = not a happy ending

but if you're really just hooked up once or twice, then let by gones be by gones and if any one asks, it was just a silly rumor!

I'd say that's pretty funny and laugh. Then tell them, I'm going to tell "bartender guy", he'll think it's funny also. I definitely would say something to "bartender guy" about his big mouth. You really shouldn't mix business with pleasure. This is what happens.

Next time...KEEP YOUR PANTS ON! especially at the workplace!

No way to fix this, deny if you want...but you'll only add LIAR to the list.

Oh blah blah blah, she f*cked a hot bartender on rebound. Give her a break. I agree not to sh!t where you eat (aka, dont f*ck co-workers) but this isnt a career... this is a restaurant, she's young, she can easily move on etc etc. Besides, everyone makes mistakes... telling her 10 time AFTER the fact that she should sleep with co-workers is just a teensy bit redundant.

To the OP: If your friends ask, tell them he's just a rebound or that he's your f*ck buddy. Either way it's nothing you should be ashamed about. He will never be your boyfriend so it is NOT important. If your friends ask, brush it off as no big deal (oh whatever, hes just hot in bed) and then change subject. Simple as that. Stop freaking out over something that ultimately.. isnt a big deal.

Good luck

"Don't fall for someone who's not willing to catch you"

Men gossip more than a room full of b!tches, no joke. Sucks you're learning this out the hard way.

If the sex is good stick with it.. But this is really something you should sort out for yourself. I would at least as the f-buddy why he opened his mouth if he wanted to keep it a secret.

as=ask

Just say nicely,"It's personal. I don't want to talk about it. It makes me uncomfortable." That's it.

Well, it is kinda rude of yr coworkers to ask something so private. How dare they. Tell them to mind their own business.

And next time any possible relation with this fella may occur, pas it up. Not with work people, ever.

Don't eat and sh*t in the same pace.

I don't get why it's a big deal if people know you said he's just a friend with benefits.I don't se why people do stuff like this if they think it's a problem. If you aren't ashamed to be sleeping with him then why hide it? I mean truthfully you're sex life isn't anybody's business no matter who you are doing it with so just tell them to mind their own and get on with life. What are you afraid will happen if it gets out?

I would just say "I'm getting some, good for me. So what's new with you?" - going over people;s expectations in revealing secrets usually shuts them up.

And seriously, good for you. I hope you enjoy it - and don't fall for him! Just have a good time and keep your head high!

i'm sorry, but did you really not expect this to happen? especially at bartending/restaurant/server jobs. everyone is under social pressure, the staff is always changing, you should know the drill. this is common knowledge. there are movies making fun of this same stuff because it's so typical.

Telling people he's your rebound or f*ck buddy is only going to make you look and sound like a slut. Have some self respect.

Honestly, if you don't want gossip, don't do things that are considered taboo like having casual sex with a co-worker on a semi-regular basis. As much as you think you're keeping things secret and keep yourself looking squeaky clean, you know now that it's impossible to do either. Seriously, if you don't want people gossiping, don't give them such juicy news to gossip about!

Thanks, nice article! This may also help you to deal with gossiping:

http://www.myhowtoos.com/en/common-howtoos/79-how-to-take-a-gossip-easie...