Disclaimer: E. Jean is back this week with quite a doozy. I happen to think she's a wee bit harsh this time, but I thought it was only fair to let you chime in and tell us what you think of the advice she's offering Miss Mimi in Miami.
Dear E. Jean,
Hi! I’ve met a handsome doctor. Everyone likes him. He’s really awesome. I just want to get his attention, challenge him, and make him curious about me. Please give me some tips for an effective way to catch him. — Mimi in Miami
To see E. Jean's answer, read more.
Dearest Mimi,
Alas, my charming numbskull, may I speak frankly? I’ve read your email a dozen times, examined your question from every angle, and each time, I’ve reached the same conclusion:
Miss Mimi, you lack the brains to “catch” the doctor. As evidence of your catastrophic nincompoopery, allow me to introduce the unedited version of the letter you sent me:
hi!i have meet handsome doctor everyone likes him he is really awesome,i just want to get his attention,challenge,curious him about me, in reverse.give me some tips how to do an effective way how to catch him — Mimi in Miami
To call this knuckleheaded would insult knuckleheads. However, all is not lost. If, in the next three months you devote a large — large — chunk of time to improving your mind, and if you email me one intelligent sentence (or three semi-witty phrases) well, my darling, then I’ll tell you how to captivate your Dr. Awesome. (But after three months of getting smarter, you’ll probably realize snaring a man is not all that.)
To see more advice from E. Jean, visit Elle magazine and AskEJean.com.
Serfontaine
Pineapple
Mon Showroom
1wow....
2Ouch, but I've got to say, when your are talking to someone you don't know very well, you should atleast try to use proper English. That note hurt my brain. What is the "in reverse" talking about?
3hahaha, you're
4Ouch, E. Jean that was harsh!
5Geeez, that response was WAY harsh! Maybe E. Jean should have thought before she responded that maybe the person who sent in the letter doesn't speak English as a first language!!!! That's nice, so she's asking for advice on how to get a guy, and you just insult her by calling her stupid. Nice advice! Well, now I know which posts I will not read anymore, I have no time for people who are mean and harsh to someone who is looking to them for help.
Horrible.....
6whatever, I agree with E Jean. that sounds like something a 15 year old with a crush on Dr. McDreamy would write. And what would a Dr. McDreamy want with a starry-eyed 15 year old? And if it's not a 15 year old, I still don't feel bad for this person because not one sentence of that was coherent. So what would a "handsome awesome doctor that everyone likes" want with THAT.
7alright good point flying horse maybe this person does in fact not speak english as a first language, and yes, she did come to E Jean for advice. but i don't know- the grammar fiend in me agrees with E Jean
8Oh and PS - I doubt that your job description says to insult and belittle people who have a hard time putting a sentence together.
9E. Jean, you seemed to have success deciphering the letter! Maybe you should have just answered the girl's question instead of insulting her and putting her down!!! I thought you were supposed to help people, NOT make them feel so small and "knuckleheaded".
Ouch! It sounds to me like the writer doesn't speak English as a first language. While this could be a set back in building a relationship with said "awesome doctor", that doesn't mean the chick is dumb...AT ALL.
10Thanks Bitte. I totally agree on the grammar fiend comment! lol! E. Jean definitely could have handled that with more tact, even if the letter made her head spin!
11I love E. Jean!
12LOL I guess I'm the only one that can offer this young or older lady's question.
I believe the only thing a woman has to do is catch his eye and smile. If you're daring enough, wink. If that arrogant basturd still doesn't acknowledge you, then forget his ass.
13Uh, even if you don't speak English as your first language, you should have learned how to capitalize, so i really don't think that was the case.
14And once again I fail at typing, *I
15While I agree with E.Jean's advice to this person and I also agree with everyone here saying it was a mean response and english is probably her second language etc. I just have to wonder... why in the world would E.Jean waste her time replying to this email in the first place??
E.Jean, you get hundreds of emails/questions sent to you daily from men and women who need real help and you waste your time (and our time) writing a nasty response to someone who nevr learnt hoq to rite good?
I've met alot of people (my boyfriend included) who have english as a second language who are brilliant people, speak perfect english but have a hard time writing it. English changes all of the rules around and while I understand that people should definitely learn correct punctuation and grammar I still think that's none of your f*cking business. If you were irritated with her mistakes then ignore the letter.. dont just insult, belittle and then ignore her plea. You're just wasting time and allowing me to lose alot of respect for you. You're supposed to be an advice columnist, not a really b!tchy english teacher.
Also... who in their right mind uses the word "nincompoopery" these days? You deserve to be belittle for your ancient, patronizing and annoying '50's phrasing just as much as this women did for her ignorance toward the english language.
16This is E. Jean's style and i doubt she'll be apologizing for that.
17Furthermore, if this guy(his profession should be secondary) was interested, he would've already made a move.
Wow, take your own advice E Jean. "Improve your mind" by realizing that building an already lacking fanbase requires you to be open minded towards fans who arent as "literate" as you are. And to call you a knucklehead for publicly responding to a fan just for the purpose of belitting them would insult knuckleheads.
18I agree that the email sent to E. Jean looks like a child wrote it and I think E. Jean should have been frank about they way this woman appears. However, there's frank and there is just plain mean. E. Jean was mean.
As for the OP's problem, don't worry about trying to catch McDreamy's attention. Be yourself because a successful relationship cannot come from lies.
19ok she was informal.
20i dont think she meant to be so offensive.
geez i think e jean's a little pissed off today (or whenever she wrote the response).
and i agree with fallen. she coulda just hit delete when she read that email. gosh!
I think that if the writer of the original email is a native English speaker, then that really does show something negative about the writer. It would look to me like she's one of those people who thinks that because she's writing an email/posting on the Internet, then normal rules of grammar automatically fly out the window. Or just massively uneducated.
If the writer isn't a native English speaker, then the email's a little more forgivable. But still, capitalization and hitting the space bar occasionally would help.
21I'm not sure why you would wate your time posting this when you could have deleted it and answered another question that was written to your liking!
22E. Jean, if you are such an English teacher (and advice columnist), then you should have responded back to the writer and helped her with the grammar. I don't like poor grammar just as much as the next person. At least politely correct this woman. Then, you could have RESPECTFULLY responded to the question.
23Every week I become less and less impressed with E Jean. She is very rude and patronizing and I feel very sorry for the people who ask her for advice because she just sh!ts on them. IMHO I hope we see a little less of E Jean on DearSugar. DearSugar has responded to emails that had many grammatical errors and she never once belittled them for it. Maybe we should leave the advice-giving to someone a little more sympathetic. Sorry to be harsh, but her negativity isn't doing any good.
24Everyone taking offense to EJean should realize she treats everyone like this. I totally agree with her.
25All you have done E Jean is shown us AND the original writer how little you really are. Poor grammer is terrible, and yes, often make life difficult, but you know what? The writer is a human being and you ought to have more compassion.
I was looking for a good reason to leave the entire sugar network and I feel this is the straw that broke the camels back.
26I'm totally baffled as to why E.Jean decided to pick this letter to respond to at all. There must have been others more worthy of some advice - or was it a slow week in her inbox?
27One word.....wow.
28I love E Jean, she is brilliant! LOVE Her!
29I think "in reverse" means: How can I make him curious about me
30I find it interesting that Mimi in Miami's letter was chosen to be the one to respond to. Unless it was the only letter sent of course... Otherwise, I suppose it's possible E.Jean just needed to vent some built up premenstrual b*tchery.
31... that is - assuming she still cycles...
32The truth hurts!
33Ahhh ha haha haha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa!!!!!
34I have practical advice for the OP:
Best way to "catch" a handsome doctor?
Go to medical school.
35Wow, this takes the cake, E. Jean. Someone writes to you (thinking you are legit) asking for help and you take their request and use it to publicly humiliate them and call them names. Maybe we could all make recommendations to you on how to improve your tact, consideration, and respect for others although it might cramp your style.
What are you picturing Mimi in Miami's reaction to be as she reads this? I'm sure she wasn't expecting her request to be turned into a joke about her.
36
???
37It might have been a little harsh, but if you're going to go cry about a curt remark from E. Jean, why write to begin with? Were you expecting anything different? That's just what she does--poor writing/English just gives her more ammunition.
38I agree, redegg. It seems to me this is a person that doesn't write in English very well & probably used something like Google translator to help explain her question- hence the "in reverse" phrase.
E. Jean- how rude!
39Maybe Team should refresh E Jean's memory of the following statement:
40"We like a happy community, therefore we moderate our comments. Vicious attacks on other users, extremely bad language, and other things that don't make for a happy place will not be allowed."
Word!
41Interesting response. And quite unprofessional, I might add.
42Oh, wait...this might explain the unprofessionalism:
"She attended Indiana University (on probation, her SAT scores were horrendously low) where she was a Pi Beta Phi and was crowned Miss Indiana University. She received an F in the only journalism course she took. She was also a cheerleader.
In 1964, representing Indiana University, she won the Miss Cheerleader USA title.[17]
She currently resides in upstate New York.[18]"
from wikipedia
43I'm surprised E. Jean didn't tell the OP to get a new, liberating haircut, and go watch surgery being preformed.
I'm sort of disgusted by the response.
44Why would Team allow someone who FAILED journalism to write on the site as part of the staff?
45I don't mind that she went to IU and was a cheerleader. I went to IU and was a cheerleader in HS. However if I am dishing advice on a website or newspaper, I sure wouldn't want my resume' to read I failed journalism.
46RCLdesigngirl I dont think you read the whole wikipedia entry... she may have failed her journalism class but I think she proved herself worthy through her Emmy nomination, her 4 books, her own website, her television shows and her being a contributing editor in some of everyone's favorite magaizines include Elle, Esquire and Playboy.
I dont agree with the "advice" (if you can call it that) she gave today and I despise the words she uses (nincompoop, my darlings, knucklehead, etc.) I dont think you have a right to take a small sentence from Wikipedia and ignore all of the accomplishments she's had since that short time in college. For everyone who's wondering checkout: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E._Jean_Carroll
E.Jean, I know you read all of these... what the hell is going on?
47"Maybe Team should refresh E Jean's memory of the following statement:
"We like a happy community, therefore we moderate our comments. Vicious attacks on other users, extremely bad language, and other things that don't make for a happy place will not be allowed.""
candycr!
48Lighten up, everyone. The E Jean posts are entertainment, anyone who writes in expecting her to have the perfect solution to every single problem is kidding themselves. Writing in to an advice column is asking for that person's opinion, and that's exactly what E Jean provided.
49Oh god people grow a spine! E Jean gives GREAT honest advice.
Mimi: A surefire way to "catch" the poor guy is to get pregnant. You're certainly not going to win him over with you brains or personality!
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