I think both of you are being childish. Wouldn't it have just been easier to simply distance yourself from her instead of resorting to such idiotic gossiping?

here here!

I doubt she'd forgive you but what she did was against the rules. I can see how if she got on your last nerve you would tell other people about it. In the grand scheme of things ... Forgive but don't do it again.

I think you should be the bigger person and not do something like this. Obviously if she is sleeping around then she has little to no self esteem. I think that you should be the bigger person and find new friends or just don't get involved with her, keep your relationship strictly professional and act like an adult.

Forgive! It's her actions that are getting her in trouble, not yours!

I'm on the fence here. We've all repeated something in our lives that we shouldn't have and felt bad about it afterwards - and hopefully learned from that; so that's my thinking that says to forgive. But a part of you knew she could get in major trouble at work or else you wouldn't have repeated that little tidbit. So you sort of knew the consequences could be dire for her, and that's the part of ne that thinks 'not forgive.'

She's one of those people whose behavior has just asking for it, and it was going to catch up with her sooner or later. You just accelerated that happening by gossiping.

Most likely, someone would never forgive you for this... but it happens. You win some and you lose some.

Forgive. She broke office policy, AND she's a hostile element towards you (being competitive, trying to one-up you, making you feel small is hostile in my book). I don't blame you for trying to get her fired, removing her from your environment. Besides, it's her own damn fault. If she learned to close her legs (at appropriate times), you wouldn't have the ammunition against her. Forgive.

how is it a secret? she told YOU and she slept with a big client at the place she works (think he kept that to himself?). there is no secret, just her big mouth and round heels. if she doesn't want people to know her business she should 1) not sleep with clients, and 2) keep her personal business to herself.

i do wonder why you continue to see her socially and why would you be after a bartender? where do you people work a liquor distributor?

I don't really care, seeing as poor behavior has a way of getting back at you. Don't feel too bad, she was aware of what she was doing.

i forgive,... it would be totally different if you lied about it and made up something. But since she did it, she broke the rules.

forgive. you might not have liked her for what she's been doing to you, but if she didn't want to jeopardize her job she wouldn't do something so stupid in the first place.

undecided. first, not very professional of you to spread the gossip. it doesn't look good back on you. second, so she was tryig to one up her, you should of let it go. it was doing nothing but making her look silly, not you. you chose to stoop to her level. but then she choose to break office policy. it became a petty argument i feel. what is her business is hers, what is your is yours.

thought what you did was not necessarily mature, it was her mistake for sleeping with the guy (and then bragging about it!). if she really wanted to save her own job, she wouldn't have told anyone, including you. i understand your frustration and see why you acted the way you did. i think it's forgivable, just don't do it again...

I agree with cjmara and glowingmoon. Forgive! Yeah, it was kinda childish, but she started it. I'd want to put an end to her too if she was driving me nuts. You shouldn't care if that other girl wouldn't forgive you. It's her fault and it's obviously not a secret because she told you. She probably told to drive you nuts, I guess. But she deserved what she got. She broke the rules anyway. Her fault she doesn't know how to keep her legs closed when working.

I guess the way I feel about it, is I understand your frustration with her but:

1)I would have just distanced myself from her the moment she started getting on my last nerve.

2)People that act this way and do such stupid things at work WILL end up hanging themselves eventually, without others even having to intervene.

Forgive, but a lesson learned, I would say. Rise above it next time, and be the better person...and keep unhealthy people at a greater distance from you!

I say forgive but just like her actions had consequences - bagging a client and bragging about it to someone who I assume she knew wasn't her bff - being gossipy and catty might bring karma to you. Especially if your team is so tight-knit...I'd distance myself from her, and myself from those kinds of trash-talking, if I were you, to keep on top of things.

This can be taken so many ways. Like many others have said, you could've distanced yourself and let her create her own demise. By you spreading the dirt, Karma will eventually catch up to you. Then again, she KNEW she went against office policy by sleeping w/the client in the first place, so she should have been aware that there's always the possibility that her admission would come back to haunt her.

Man, karma is gonna bite you in the ass hardcore. Then again, her behavior has been horridly inappropriate; and she dug her own grave by telling you about her sexual escapades. Next time someone acts that way towards you, do yourself a favour, and distance yourself.

This woman is poison. Instead of spreading the news around, I would have told my supervisor what she did. She has some serious issues, and she's really putting the company's reputation on the line by sleeping with clients and co-workers. She needs to be stopped because she's acting immature and unprofessionally.

Also, it's obvious she only tells you her sexual escapades because she wants you to feel jealous, and she's just showing off. Your best response next time is to tell her that you're willing to report her to your supervisor. You're not even asking about her sex life, so that's a great way to make her stop!

You both sound like little children. Grow up.

Forgive. It would have gotten around somehow anyway.

Forgive. But watch your back, you can easily be next in line. I mean, if it takes just a 'rumor' to get you in trouble then someone can easily make up a FAKE rumor about you *although in this case, it's the 'truth'.

Why do you have to 'play games' like this in the work place. I'm with the crowd that says 'Grow up.'

Don't befriend those whom you think are 'enemies.'

Definitely NOT forgive. Why didn't you just report it to management? That would have been the ethical thing to do. Or you could have just kept it to yourself. Instead, you took the trashy way of spreading it around the office.

Seriously, grow up and evaluate your ethical standards, the both of you. On different levels, of course, but karma doesn't reward trash talking in any way.

Last - she probably trusted you on some level to divulge personal details. Regardless of her trashy behavior, she probably never thought in a million years you would spread it to everyone in the office. I know she totally put herself in that situation, but if she found out you were the source of it, how would you feel?

Zawackirz, how can you be so sure that the girl has no self esteem just because she sleeps around? It's a well know phenomenon that women 'usually' get emotionally attached after sex, but not all women are the same. If a woman is not in the position of being tied down but is sexually active and enjoys sex, I don't see anything wrong with sleeping around a bit as long as it's safe physically/emotionally. However, her sleeping with a client is a big no-no.

Sorry for not staying on topic. Anyways, that kind of petty competition is rather immature. You and her should both grow up a bit and focus on work.

well, i know the type, therefore i see how tempting the situation really was, but it isnt anything to be proud of. Spreading dirty secrets is immature and hurtful , especially if someone trusted you so much to confide in you. If you have it in you to let it go, you should have just kept to yourself and had a talk with her about her boundaries. If you really couldnt hold it in, it would have been smarter to just go straight to managment and see how theyd like to deal with it. But as far as spreading that secret, you cant expect to ever be forgiven, but do you really want her friendship anyway?
In my opinion, fess up, tell her the truth, admit you were wrong, and then put it behind you and learn your lesson: GOSSIP IS A NO NO!

forgive...ur coworker or friend(?) started all the stupidity and i know no one should let her way at it by leaving the issue behind but u should have let 'things' do it's way to backfire on her. by starting all the gossips, u also have ur own share of guilt at the end. both of u are guilty about something and both of u acted immature.

one more thing, think she will have a heavier consequence than you coz she acted much stupider when she spill her stupid actions..

Come on, now. How old are we? This kind of behavior was bad enough as teenagers, but as grown business "professionals"? No one is right in this situation.

friggin right, i'd forgive. the girl was the one who made the mistake, and who also made the mistake of telling you. whatever, she deserves what she gets.

Not forgive. To overuse a hackneyed saying, two wrongs don't make a right. You should've confronted her directly about her competitiveness if you had such a problem with it.

Sure, she broke the rules of the office. But you could've just gone to her supervisor instead of spreading her dirty secrets all across the office. What you did was vindictive and unprofessional.

I said not forgive. The only reason you did this was because you don't like her. Seriously, there is a huge difference of someone annoying you than potentially ruining a career.

I understand that she did something against the rules, so in fact she put her job on the line herself, but it think it was really very mean and nasty of you to purposely put her at risk of losing her job because she annoys you.

I have people like this in my life, and I simply distance myself from them as much as possible. Losing a job can lead to so many other things to fall apart in someones life. I think you both need to stay away from each other. Plus the way she was going it probably would have caught up to her eventually anyway, you should have let nature run it's course. And no one likes a tattle teller

NOT FORGIVE

yeah...just like damned high school...welcome to her level you're as dirty as she is.

Gosh, how old are you two?? It has been said repeatedly in the posts above, but BOTH of you seriously need to grow up! What she did was totally wrong, but the way you handled it, in my opinion was WORSE! You should have gone to her supervisor, but instead, you spread this stuff all over the office. Yeah, she will probably lose her job, but you will still be there. AND everyone will know that you have loose lips and spread gossip...don't be surprised if you find yourself getting the "cold shoulder" from the rest of the office. I know I wouldn't want to risk telling you anything!!

She is a sicko and she does need to be put in her place but you have to think about karma though.

I suspect she won't forgive you. Maybe you should have talked to her and that there is some underline reason she started to behave this way.

i agree 100% with Silverlining10 - you said the right thing, just to the wrong audience. she is absolutely making your firm look bad by sleeping with a major client, and that's something your supervisor (and hers!) should be aware of. gossiping is never the solution. next time, woman up and go to your supervisor.

anyone else should be sympathetic, but i don't think SHE's ever going to forgive you, but she pretty much had it coming

Absolutely forgive! I have very little tolerance for people who break the rules on purpose and don't expect to deal with the consequences. She knew that that was a big mistake and she did it anyways, the personal stuff is just extra.

Maybe the fact that she slept with him is one of the reasons he is still a big client?

Not forgive.......you could have quietly gone to her supervisor if it was only about her breaking the company policy but instead you made the choice to be spiteful and mean-spirited.I'd be pissed at you.

It's f*cked up, but you don't tell your business at work.

and then on top of that, she was acting stank to the people she told her business to.

you better get dibs on her stapler and her pen holders before somebody else gets them!

The moral of the story is...work is work. i know we all like to make friends at work, but the reality is muthaf*ckas don't know how to separate the two.

your co-workers don't need to know who ya f*ckin', how often you buy shoes, if ya man is a pig at home, NOTHING.

the cocktail parties?? yeah, let your co-workers know that you have enough money to have a in-wall aquarium, and they can barely afford to buy the big can of Folgers.

you are just letting folks into your world, which is a big potential for sh*t like this to happen.

you never know who is a smilin' face.

the only thing co-workers need to know is if you got that email they sent you.

and i don't see what's the difference between telling the boss versus the rumor.

both would have been don't with malintent.

snitching is snitching. PERIOD.

I think your both incredibly immature. Grow-up and learn what it means to be professional fine you do not like to be around her anymore so stop hanging out together. A someone stated above what you did was spiteful and mean.

no i don't commend you for starting the true rumor, but this girl had it coming to her eventually. someone like that can't keep it a secret long that she's sleeping with co-workers and clients.

forgive
u go girl
karma? what karma? its that wh*res fault. she thinks sleeping around is going to make her 'popular'. and she was trying to compete with u. and she told u, not as a secret but to brag. so what if u told others about it? its okay, because it wasnt a secret. and she deserves to be fired for being the office slut. and it aint a rumor, its the truth. she was being unprofessional and its not like u meant to get her fired. dont feel guilty. because she totally deserves it.