Dear Sugar,
I have a fear of being on the highway even when I am not the one who is driving the car. I trust my friends and family, but I am scared of the other drivers on the road. I can't seem to shake the feeling that we could get into a horrible accident and die. I make myself sick when I think about getting onto a highway or a freeway. I sweat and my hands clam up. How can I stop living in fear? Back Road Bettina
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Dear Back Road Bettina,
Think of the facts. Only 4% of serious or fatal accidents occur on interstates nationwide. These are the safest roads in the nation.
Only about 1.48% (for every 100 million vehicle miles travelled) get into fatal accidents. This is a statistic from 2003 when this was a particularly HIGH year for highway deaths. Out of those fatalities, 40% were alcohol related. What this information tells you is that this is a very low percentage.
So now that you understand the facts, you should feel much calmer knowing that the likelihood of you getting into an accident on a highway is slim. Here are some things that you can do to make yourself feel even more comfortable.
- Do your best to drive in safe conditions. It is more common for accidents to occur during rain and snow so try and stay off of the highways during bad weather.
- Always wear your seat belt. More than half (56%) of people who are killed on the road were not using seat belts.
- If possible, try not to look at the road when you are in the car. Be the DJ, read, or do something to distract yourself when you are the passenger.
- Make sure the driver isn't driving recklessly or doing something to sidetrack them from focusing on the road (i.e. putting on make-up or talking on their cell phone).
- Ask the driver not to speed, not to switch lanes and to please stay in the right lane where cars drive more slowly. This way if you are panicked, you can take the next exit and get off of the highway more quickly.
Mulberry
Repetto
John Frieda
How about some therapy? That would probably help you immensely....even some kind of hypnosis therapy? Good luck:)
1I totally agree with Jenna! Toronado can talk more about the anxiety issues, but this sounds like something you need to address with a professional! Good luck!
2i get how you feel, it freaks me out when my mom drives me on the highway!! and usually i have my bf drive me around so when i finally start driving on the highway it's a bit of a shock.
my tips are stay on the far right lane on the road (of course this is the slowest lane). if you're afraid of cars coming in and mergin with the right lane, try staying in the middle lane, that way you're away from the walls and people can pass you easier. maintain a steady speed, the slowest you should drive is 5mph below the speedlimit on the slowest lane...anything slower and people like me would pass you up constantly and honk at ya. don't rely solely on mirrors, do the "head check" quickly. it'll reassure you more than just looking at the side mirrors. keep tabs on the vehicles around you, knowing where they are usually makes you feel better.ALSO, look ahead and plan ahead that way you'll have more time to react if you're looking at head, just don't focus on too many details.
other than that i dunno. play your favorite music or listen to your favorite fm station. you can try holding conversations with your friends in the car or take in the scenery. if you're driving, i wouldn't suggest using your cell. just try to think of other soothing thing but still maintain focus on the road if you're the one driving. learn to multithink rather than focus on being stressed
3yeah, like sugar said. try to request for the driver to not speed or change lanes too quickly and stay on the right lane. i'm pretty sure they'll be understanding
4I've heard of a type of therapy where you confront your fear head on and immerse yourself in it. If you were afraid of spiders, as an example, you could go to the zoo, speak to the spiderologists (is that a word?) and learn all you can about spiders and become an expert on spiders. The more you know about them and their habits, the better.
5In your case, perhaps along with therapy, you could learn as much as you possibly can about cars (how they are built, how to change your oil, where the parts come from, what part makes what noise, different designers etc.) You could even try going to one of these race tracks where they let you get behind the wheel with an instructor. You get to dress up in the fancy gear and wear a helmet too, how cool would that be? The more you know, the less afraid you might be. Best of luck to you.
I get antsy on the highway too, but you just have to get out there, face your fears, but above all, be safe and courteous of others.
6This is why I never used my license, I fear this kind of stuff
7You should use Jenna's method HOH
8cali......I am speechless....LOL!!!!!!!
9No, please don't use HOH technique if you are nervous on highway...ouch.
kylake's immersion therapy suggestion is actually a good one.
Just kidding Jenna. I agree with Kylake too
10I know you are hunnybunny, no worries.....
11I just don't want to be associated with HOH and TB for the rest of my life....whoa is me!
LOL!
LOL Granny, but I'll never look a highway the same again and I must try your methods. See I still have much to learn
12I will gladly hand over the book of teachings, grasshopper!
13Alright gals...will be back in a few hours....have a flight here in about a half hour.
Bye JennaV
If anyone joins the mile high club on your watch, be sure to blog it for
me.
14Bye Jenna!
15HAy good advice!
16What the heck is hoh method?
17Honey31, you are too good of a catholic girl to hear that one
18SAys who caligirl?Lol you dont know me as well as you think you do baby.I have an evil side to you know so spit it out I can handle anything.
19Sorry, I thought you said you were catholic and you haven't done any of our adult blogs so I figured.
20Im catholic my dear girl but Im not perfect lol.I have not done the adult blogs yet but you just wait and see missy.
21Kylake I've heard of that and supposedly it's great. I have a fear of flying (which valium takes care of- not going to advise that as a cure for fear of driving on highways though, lol) and I've had it suggested to me, and actually know a few people that it has helped quite a bit.
22Ill pass on that!Lol
23Cali I went to a Catholic high school (not Catholic myself but spent 3 years there all the same) and its the Catholic girls you have to watch out for.. lol.
24I know love,you're right about us Catholics.All that sexual repression just builds up....
25As for driving on the motorway,I consider myself a good,considerate driver,but i'm sh*t scared of the motorway,when I first started driving,I took a wrong turning,and ended up on the slip road(the road that puts you on the motorway) Once you're on that,you can't turn round,there's no way back and I SHAT myself, and just stopped the car and started crying,all the drivers behind me were beeping like crazy,it was raining heavy and I had had my small son with me.I froze.Eventually the kindest man in the world risked his life and stopped his car beside me and asked me what was wrong, I told him and he directed all the traffic behind me so i could reverse back into the road i should've gone on.I will be forever grateful to him.Inever thanked him personally,but I wrote a big thank you letter to the Manchester Evening News.This sparked off about two weeks of arguing between readers saying it was stupid of me stopping the car and of how irresponsible the man was for doing this.There was no other way for me to go though,I would've had a heart attack if I'd have gone on that motorway.It's other stupid drivers I worry about,not my own driving.
My Dad is the only driver I feel safe on the motorway with.
Anyone else and i have to keep my head down in the back seat
When my friend was driving on the motorway,I sat up front,once, and I had to face my other major fear.I went to check my make up in the sunshield and the biggest, scariest spider was climbing down it.Oh God,i've got goosepimples just typing this, I tried not to scream so I wouldn't scare my friend but she could see the terror in my face, we had our children in the car so I couldn't clambour into the back.She had to pull over to the hard shoulder,which the police druminto you is only there for emergencies.Thank God I wasn't driving when it happened.I'm such a wuss.
26Boy I hate spiders to louise lol.That was very sweet of that man to help u out maybe he was your guardian angel.As for me I will not drive I hate it!Im scared sh*tless of it lol.Sorry for the colour words.
27Hun I know how u feel. Im monocluared and I had to get myself past this. I had to be able to drive and ride. Try laying ur seat back if u can and just breathing. Think of it this way. If its ur time ur gonna go whether ur in a car or not kwim? GL babes I hope u can get thru it if not seek some conselling.
28You are right toxxic.I can die another way like a fire or what ever!I try not to dwell on this kind of stuff lol.
29You're a doll,toxxic (",)
30Yes Toxxic is a doll!All of you are great people to talk to lol.
31Honey,I think he was my Guardian angel,and you know what? He was gorgeous,and he went to the trouble of writing to the newspaper to get my e-mail address,but they wouldn't give it out,however they did give me his,and I never kept it.Dammit
32Lol u misplaced his email?That sucks he truly was an angel to help you out in such a situation.k eep looking maybe you will find it this time.
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