I stand wherever the bride and groom stand. It is their wedding, their affair, and their rules. I would decline if I were breastfeeding and could not be apart from my child for the duration of their event if I were in that circumstance. I personally enjoy kids at weddings, but not everyone does and I respect that.

Our wedding was 16 and over. We don't enjoy children, and all the adults had a great night away from the kids! We had no complaints.

It's up to the bride and groom ... they can invite or not invite anyone they want. Now the guest asking to bring a parent or did you actually say parentS to babysit, that's tacky and I hope the bride and groom had enough balls to say no.

I agree with bbkf, especially if there is alcohol being served...and for breastfeeding moms, correct me if I'm wrong, but can't breast milk be stored for a short time? I know I've been to weddings where a crying baby was a big disruption to the ceremony and I remember thinking, wow, I hope that is never the case at my (hypothetical) wedding!

I honestly think it's rude that parents presume that they can/should bring kids to a wedding, unless it's very clearly a casual affair or the kids have been specifically invited. It's like assuming that you can bring your kids to a formal dinner with colleagues or to the theatre downtown. That is, no bride or groom should even have to specify that the wedding is kid-free; it should be presumed kid-free until they state/show otherwise.

I agree w/ everyone else. It's their wedding their rules! I personally would want a kid-free wedding myself. It's my BIG day and I don't want a crying baby to disrupt it or annoy the guests.

It's definitely the bride's and groom's decision...if they choose not to have children at their wedding, then that's the way it is!

i wouldnt want a bunch of little kids running around the reception and crying during the ceramony...NO THANK YOU!

It's the bride and groom's call. Kids at weddings can be fun but also horrifying.

I opted to go kid-free and it was excellent.

I couldn't imagine having gotten married without kids there - there are ten nieces and nephews between us, out of town (so we don't get to see them much), plus several more that call us aunt and uncle. We wanted the kids there. But that's me and my husband; it's how we structured our wedding.

If a couple doesn't want kids there, then I don't see how anyone can really get upset about it. Each couple can and should have whatever wedding they want to have. Some people won't come to the wedding. People with kids aren't going to travel to another town, stay in a hotel, then leave the baby in the hotel. But as long as the bride and groom recognize this and are ok with it, then it's an informed choice. (Of course that depends on whether guests even have kids, and other factors.)

I hated going to weddings as a kid. What kid wants to sit through some boring ceremony when they could be playing with toys? Although, I grew up in a very conservative Christian church where weddings were just church services followed by punch (not spiked) and cake in the church basement. I didn't realize weddings could be fun until I went to my boyfriend's friend's wedding when I was 24. (dancing & drinking, oh my!) I think a no kid wedding is really in everyone's best interest. Even if the bride & groom love kids, trust me, they don't want to be there.

Their actually not ALL that better than the all adult wedding... Trust something about kids make the wedding a little exciting...

Our wedding was restricted to those of legal drinking age in Ontario (19) and over. Using this as our reason made a lot of people feel better about us not allowing children, but we really didn't want issues with the law! No Mounties were allowed at my Canadian wedding! LOL!

I couldn't agree more with you TsuKata!

While we love children, we had a kid free reception! For starters we had a very small wedding and couldn't afford to pay for a bunch of kids that would barely eat the food and only want cake. They were more than welcome to the ceremony, but not the reception. Besides, most parents wanted a night of to relax!

Our wedding was super family friendly, but I have my own daughter so how could I make it not kid friendly. I can understand why people who do not have kids do not want them at their wedding, or people who do not like kids. I personally loved having all of them there, but we planned our entire event around families so that made all the difference.

Usually, if it is an adult only reception, we opt not to go.

My son and the flower girl were in the wedding, but after the cake and food at the reception the children were taken home with grandparents while the young people danced the night away.

I am inviting children who are family, but attempting to exclude those who are not simply for cost reasons. I am probably going to provide some sort of nursery service during the ceremony for the young kids, but really I am not too worried about a child ruining the ceremony because I think I will be too in the moment to really notice them. I also feel like the people I am inviting with children are responsible enough to take their child out to the hallway if they are causing a scene.

I think it's a good idea. Weddings are not that interesting for kids and they can be very long depending on the type of service.

I think its rude to bring children to a wedding unles their names are on the invitation. No child wants to sit through a wedding!! It will be very to my guests that children are not invited to my ceremony.

sorry....it will be very *clear* to my guests that children are not invited. I will also include on my program that a nursery is provided. I have also heard of bride & grooms having someone to stand in the vestibue, foyer, etc. politely directing guests w/ children to the nursery. Not a bad idea, imo.

I will definitely NOT be having any kids at my wedding. Every time a baby cries in the middle of a ceremony, or a toddler throws a tantrum during a reception, I cringe. I don't want to deal with the issues that can come up with kids, plus I think that the parents have more fun without their kids around! I love children, but I don't think they have a place at a wedding.

Thanks for taking note of my, admittedly, sarcastic suggestion.

On the topic, there is a huge age gap between my siblings and I, me being the youngest by at least fifteen years. So I went to all of their weddings as a child and, you know what, i don't remember a single one of them. I didn't appreciate the moment at all and sure the reception was okay, because I just played with the other kids there.

I wouldn't mind saying no children at my ceremony, and then allow them at the more casual reception.

I think it's totally up to the bride and groom. I've only taken mine to one wedding and they were definitely welcome. One of them was still in my belly, so she was easy. But, my son behaved very well and it was a great opportunity for him to be able to see family at the reception who he doesn't see often.

But, if we were invited to a wedding where children weren't allowed, we wouldn't bat an eye. That's not a personal affront. It's the bride and groom's choice who they want to include! If I were still nursing either of my children, I would likely decline the invitation.

I am so glad to see that I'm not the only one who thinks it's perfectly acceptable to want no kids at my wedding! At $50-100 a head, if you bring your two kids (that I probably don't really care about participating anyway), that's more than I want to spend. Not only that, kids (especially the young ones) can be unpredictable and can cry, talk, or throw a tantrum at any given time. With the ceremony usually lasting only minutes, I would NOT want to waste those minutes on a crying baby.

At my brother's church wedding, in the middle of the ceremony, there were some people ga-ga-gooing over a baby and taking photos of the kid. The baby was perfectly good in this case, but I wanted to kick the parents and all their stupid friends who didn't have the courtesy to just shut up for 15 minutes.

If the parents don't care enough to respect what you want on your one big day, kindly tell them that you'll have to meet up with them on another occasion when you're not as busy.

I'm so glad to see so many people on here respecting the kids-free idea! At $50-100 a head, I really don't want to pay for extra people that I wouldn't care to have at my wedding anyway. If a couple brings their 2 kids, guess what? That's extra money I'd have to shell out. If several couples each brought 2 kids, think of how many extra tables I'd need.

At my brother's church wedding, a couple brought their baby and proceeded to go "goo-goo-gaga" with their baby and friends. They were taking photos, talking, and giggling WHILE THE CEREMONY WAS TAKING PLACE!!! In this case, the baby was perfectly quiet, but it was the adults that were being noisy! They couldn't even give my brother 15 minutes for his ceremony. I really wanted to kick them all.

With the ceremony being a short time, having a crying baby really ruins it. If the parents can't respect your kids-free wedding idea, kindly tell them you'll meet up with them another day when you are not so busy. I'd rather pay for a sitter than pay for the kid's meal if "I can't afford a sitter" is the excuse.

Well, it's totally up to the bride and groom, but I think a kid-friendly wedding followed by a kid-free reception would be the best. I don't really like kids too much, but I would at least want them at the wedding because my boyfriend's brothers have children and would have to travel to be at my wedding and would probably not be super happy if their kids weren't allowed.

children are apart of any family and a wedding to me is about bringing 2 families together... of course have kids, but on another note bad ass brats need not come... b/c they will get kicked outta my wedding.. haha but well behaved children add to the magic of the day

Children are a big part of our families we have 2 young ones of our own so at mine of course they are invited. I wouldnt go to one that my kids are not invitef to just cuz they r a part of me

I'm having a destination wedding at an adults-only resort in Mexico. Problem solved!

If you want an adult only reception, go for it. If you know one of your guests is breastfeeding or has a small child, arrange for babysitters at the reception. My cousin's wedding on April 12th was kid-free, and the three breastfed babies who came stayed with a babysitter upstairs in one of the hotel rooms. Moms could run up to feed and come back down to dance. It was perfectly fine.

We're going to allow kids who are related to us--I'm not too worried, they're mostly old enough to behave themselves and if not, I can deal.

I love kids, but the problem is that I've been to wedding where kids were runnin gup and down the aisle and talking during the ceremony. The problem is really the parents of these children, as I never did such things as a child because my mother wouldn't have allowed it.

I just got married two weeks ago, and we decided to have only kids of family (also for cost reasons). There aren't many small kids in our family, so we didn't have to worry about the crying baby whose parents were too rude to get up and leave the ceremony. The youngest kids were my new neices and nephew, who were in the wedding. Hvaing the kids there during the reception really and truly made our wedding video, because everyone thought they were so adorable.

It's 100 percent the bride's and groom's right to decide to not have kids if they think it's going to be a problem. HOWEVER, writing "adults only" or "no clidren under 12" (which I've seen on invites before) is rude. Address the inner envelope to the people who are invited, and if they RSVP for more, you have to call them and explain. That's the rule, and honestly, writing "adults only" on a lovely wedding invitation looks pretty tacky.

I wish we could edit our comments after posting. Yuck.

i've been to MANY weddings. and i HATE, more than a broken heel on a shoe, when kids make noise with all their d*mn whinning and crying and standing up in the pews!!!!!

it's like, "can you get your f*ckin' kid??!!!!"

alot of the times the kids are bored and it gets harder as the night comes and some of the kids leave. The left over kids are more antsy because there is no one to play with.

I've been to a few where the kids in the bridal party were all escorted to another reception room for the kids only, and they did their kid thing (whatever the hell kids do).

i don't think it's wrong for the bride and groom to NOT invite kids. it's their business. if you're THAT tied at the hip ( i can understand the babysitter thing, but then again, you get the wedding invite WELL in advance) to the kid, then that's your bad. don't come.

i wouldn't want kid at my ceremony (do you really want me to go off in church?), and the reception would be them wasting food and running around.

if i send you an invitation that said "Michelle and Guest", i suppose i would have to put in fine print (for the handy-tards) "Guest should be 16 and older".

i expect people to follow directions. just like "black tie" and they show up in jeans and a polo shirt (cousin's wedding)!

Some people have no clue. If you don't explicitly state "no children" or "adults only", they're gonna ASSume "of course the kids can come along! They're part of us. Why, we didn't even bother to cut the cord!" These are likely to be the same kind of people who might just show up with the kids without notice and will think it's adorable when the kids are screaming like banshees and/or running up and down the aisle during the ceremony (And breaking table settings and digging pieces out of the cake).

The drinking age thing sounds like a good idea. Good and official. Makes it sound like bringing kids would be AGAINST THE LAW. Excellent.

are people serious?

weddings are a tim for a community of support to celebrate a life changing event. Children are a part of that community and a possible view of the future for the bride and groom! It seems rather cold and austere to complain about toddlers walking down the aisle as are growing and learning to walk-- childhood is as magical as love and has a place at weddings.

i hope that at my wedding there infants to 90 year olds!

childhood is magical . . .LMBAO (laughing my black a*s off).

look, i like kids, but come the hell on . . .

if the invite says "adults only" or whatever, it's not the bride and groom complaining, it's them setting the rules. just like a dress code.

excuse the f*ck out of them for not wanting to have a "community of support".

everybody wants to be accommodated because they have kids.

either RSVP or don't. move on . . .

I'm laughing over the language used in the comments to this post. I wouldn't be happy either to have poorly behaved children at my wedding but based on the comments here you'd think people were convinced parents and their kids actually set out to ruin weddings and piss off brides. Like brides, most of them aren't perfect but most of them aren't monsters, either.

Wow-- I agree Zulkey! I assuming many people haven't met well behaved kids or conscientious parents!
I come from a huge Italian family and have been going to weddings since I remember--and I enjoyed every one of them. The kids can have just as much fun as the other guests--and sure maybe send them up to bed with a babysitter after a little excitement and that way everyone is happy! I agree, weddings are about family and children are a part of my family so they will for sure be there.

As for people not going to weddings if children weren't invited I don't agree--in college I babysat for many families at their house or the hotels they were staying at during the wedding. They enjoyed a night alone!

I think it's up to the couple getting married.

Not all children are the wild animals that some people think they are, some of them are taught to behave a certain way in social situations. And those types of parents would typically remove a crying baby from a ceremony/reception whatever so as not to disrupt the event. Of course those types of parents would also know not to bring children to a wedding if the invitiation is addressed only to Mr. & Mrs. Name, nor would they even think to ask to bring a child or parent or any other uninvited guest to the wedding.

We had children at our wedding and reception, we also did not have alcohol. It was a fun day and the few children that were there were incredibly well behaved.

re: kenziebaby's comment - a child learning to walk is cool. a child learning to walk in the middle of a wedding during a formal ceremony (as some are) is not cool. And its bad manners. Even if a child is well behaved, WHAT KID WANTS TO SIT QUIET FOR 30-45 MINUTES FOR SOMETHING THAT THEY DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND? What's wrong with a nursery?? Honestly, I think it is more unbeleivable for a parent to make a child sit still for that long than a bride & groom requesting no children.

Yay for kid free weddings! But hey seriously it's up to the wedding couple it is their event and their decision should be respected.

I'm glad to see the majority agrees we weren't crazy or rude for not inviting children. Some of our guests still brought their 4 kids even though they RSVPed for just themselves (the mom and dad). It all worked out though b/c they got to sit in the empty seats of the people who RSVPed and didn't show. *double oy* They were also all very well behaved.

I comepletely agree that it is up to the individual couple.

We ahve decided to invite kids because a: we have 4 nieces/nephews & 4 godsons plus many of our friends have children that we care about.

and b: if we didn't allow children some of our nearest and dearest friends would not be able to come and it is more important to us to have our friends there than to exclude children.

and c: we want to have children together and since this event is about community coming together and celebrating our future it felt right to us that children be present.

now, we've decided not to include any children in the actual ceremony and we are hiring 2-3 babysitters and setting up a kids area with toys, personal dvd players and art projects.

that way if parents want to drop their kid off so they can boogie on the dance floor they can do so with ease.

wow asia, i am not sure there is any reason to be that cynical.

children are children-- they are not adults, and if their parents are adult enough to scoop them up or take them out when they cry, everything should be fine. i think people are pinning instances of poor parenting on to kids... not so cool.

people want to be accommodated for having kids? its not so radical considering children are the future of our world. they are a part of life, and this gets back to the main reason i think they ought to be at weddings anyway!

At my wedding we had a flower girl and a ring bearer and those were the only kids. Not to be selfish or anything but the cute ring bearer totally hogged the spotlight all night. It would have been a nightmare if there were more kids there. I don't really like kids to begin with especially the brats my cousin calls children so I made the decision not to include them. I think it's a personal choice and shouldn't reflect badly on the bride and groom.

Whatever the bride and groom want. My wedding and reception will definitely be kids free. I am willing to provide sitters at a hotel or something but I do not want them at the ceremony or reception! Our party our rules!

If the bride and groom want a kid free wedding, then go for it!

Sorry, no kids. I would even go so far as to say 21+. I've been to weddings/receptions where kids who were 12-20 tried to get in on the open bar, have had to deal with kids whining to their parents to let them drink and saw them hanging around the bar with begging eyes. I mean, the little kids just ran around pulling things down and crying...The tweens and teens were obnoxious during speeches and throughout the entire occasion. NO THANK YOU! I'm willing to pay for a baby-sitter!

Here's another thing I don't want to see at my wedding, but have had the pleasure of experiencing at every wedding: 16 year-old blossoming girls wearing what appears to be a BIKINI to the wedding. WOW, girls, this is MY night. If you want to look like a stripper, take it down to the street corner.