Even if you’re the one doing the breaking, breaking up isn’t easy. But when you’re the one being rejected and having your heart broken, it’s especially difficult. In my opinion, the very worst part of the breakup is when you actually have to let go. To check out some helpful advice on making this experience easier, read more.
- As I’ve said before, being sad is an important feeling, so don’t hide from it. In fact, embracing it can really make a difference when it comes to the healing process. So get out your tissues, call your mom, and wallow in your own self-pity for a while.
- As much as you want to crawl into a hole and hide, don’t. Go out; interact with people. Don’t worry about meeting new guys, just focus on having fun and being comfortable as a single gal.
- Write it down! Writing down everything you might want to say to your ex may not be as satisfying as actually saying it, but it can still be helpful, productive, and cleansing. Plus it lets you obsess as much as you want!
- Stop focusing on the good, and start thinking about the bad. OK, I only mean when it comes to your ex. Instead of remembering all the good things, try to remember all of the things that upset you, hurt you, and drove you nuts. I know it sounds negative, but it’s actually very helpful at providing a reality check, since most of the time we tend to glamorize the past.
- Try to do something new. Start cooking, rock climbing, or training for a 5K. Not only will it distract you from feeling down, but it’s a great self-esteem booster.
Just remember, you will feel better eventually. Just don’t give up!
Lacoste
All Saints
Aminaka Wilmont
thanks for the tips!
1These are all the exact same tips that every column gives, every time.
2The only thing that works is time.
Good tips. You covered all the ones I was going to say.
3Great tips! That's exactly what I did.
4After the breakup I realized that now I have nothing holding me back from doing what I really want. I'm young and have my whole life ahead of me... I'm allowed to be selfish for the time being. So what am I doing? Learning how to speak French and one year from now, bid me adieu, for I will be well on my way to Paris, the city of light, or shall I say la ville-lumière
I am in an amazing relationship now, but today I found myself thinking about my ex and being sad (it might have been the gloomy weather and listening to The Cure), so I wrote down a list of all the bad things about him (which is pretty much everything!) and it made me feel tons better.
5I think focusing on the negative helped me moved on. I mean, the relationship was great and all but there is a reason why it ended. And when you're feeling lonely, you always seem to think about how you two cuddled and watched tv on a rainy day. So, nowadays, I think about how he hogged the remote and always watched hockey...argh.
6I chop my hair off ... and make a clean cut. It gives me a new look that is about me and not pleasing some guy.
7bengalspice I did a similar thing! During one of my many break-ups with my college sophmore boyfriend I went from blonde to super dark brown just because I needed something different and I knew he had a thing for blondes. Turns out, he ended up loving my hair!! LoL!! Gez Maneez...
8Tips are right on, I do agree that time is the best remedy. But the hard part for me at least is glamorizing the past. It's hard to stop thinking about how great something was instead of just get over it!
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