Dear Sugar
I have recently become engaged and will be married this September. I know there are going to be a lot of changes in my life due to two lives becoming one and I am excited for the new adventure. My fiance and I have our money issues pretty much worked out and have agreed that as we communicate, we will be fine monetarily.
We have recently opened a joint account together to keep our wedding money organized as we are paying for a large portion of the big day. The problem is that he is so anal and paranoid that something is going to happen to the money that is insistent upon be not carrying my check book or ATM card in my purse anymore.
He has told me that he is not worried about keeping up with our expenditures, rather he is worried about someone stealing my purse and having access to the checks. While I understand his concern about all our money being in one place for such an important occasion, his level of anxiety is a little concerning.
If someone were to get a hold of a check, the bank would know if it was stolen and we would be able to get reimbursed. What were to happen if I were to be stranded and needed to get money out of my bank account? How can I get him to lighten up without this ballooning into a huge issue? Penny Pincher Paulette
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Dear Penny Pincher Paulette
Congratulations on your engagement and let me say how impressed I am that you are paying for your own wedding; you should feel very empowered. With that said, try to understand your fiance's concern, although your fiance's paranoia sounds to be a bit over the top. Has he been robbed before or mugged to make him so on edge?
Do you have a separate bank account for personal use, or have you merged all your income to the wedding account? My first suggestion to you would be to open an account for your day to day expenses as it is always a good idea to have some sense of financial freedom, that way you don't have to touch the money that is set aside for your big day.
It is also always a good idea to carry some cash and a credit card in case of emergencies. Financial concerns are common arguments between couples so open the lines of communication and make sure you are on the same page monetarily before you walk down the aisle! Good luck on your upcoming wedding.