I am definitely in the middle of mine right now! I have a good job, but is it really what I want?!?! Should I move?

I'll be curious to see what all of you went through!

I am definitely in the middle of one now.I really hate my job, I can't stand my cr*p colleagues who pretend they are doing a great job while I am trying so hard! I am thinking of getting out of it by mid to end year. I dread going to work so much! Gosh!

I am also starting on a weight loss project, to lose all the kg I gained back since starting my job and I want to be able to fit into my fab wardrobe again!!!

I packed up and moved from VA to OK (my younger stepsisters are out there). I guess I thought I needed a brand new start (I was born and raised in VA). Anyhoo - moved to OK, got settled, got a crappy job, went to a crappy college for two years... And then decided that the whole move was a really stupid decision and moved myself back to VA.

5 years later I'm still in VA, I've got a GREAT job and I couldn't be happier.

Even though I think my move to OK was a dumb decision, I'm glad I did it - I proved to myself that I had the courage to move away and make it on my own, without my close family and friends around.

My ten year high school reunion made me take a long hard look at myself. I realized that I was in a bad marriage and had made a series of compromising decisions over the years that were not making me happy. I am in the process of pulling myself out of that hole and really discovering who I want to be and what I want to do.

A few things...ha.

I'm in mine right now. I'm unsure if I want to stay at this job, I'm not sure if what I'm in college for is what I really want to do with my life, I'm tired of doing the same things every day: work and school, and My BF left 2 weeks ago for Iraq so I am really lonely without him even with my friends being here for me. There's just so much emotion and worrysome going on.

Like the rest of the gals above me, I'm in mines FOR SURE!
I'm currently unemployeed, have only one friend (wish I had more) and this damn weightloss thing is killing me....

I think I am still in mine. I think you just have to try and be happy where you are, instead of trying so hard to "get somewhere." i mean, don't abandon your goals, but don't worry so much about being in transition. It's a nice and unique place to be in life, even if it's difficult. The beauty of it is you've still got a lot of opportunity. So many good things are still left to happen.
My problem is having so many friends who are married now, and feeling pretty isolated. But it too will pass, I am sure.

Um, I've had an ongoing one I suppose. Nearly done with my doctorate but STILL not sure I want to pursue a career in my (very specialised) subject, still have no savings, property or anything to my name, and seeing all the people my age starting families and really settling down makes me ... not yearn for a mortgage and a baby, but feel like I'm not where I'm supposed to be. Which is ridiculous as there's no set trajectory to life, but I often feel like I'm having a much more difficult time getting started than other people. I've picked up and moved several times, to several countries, hoping a change of scenery will help, but I still have feelings of unease about the direction I'm taking. I'm getting the feel this is the norm for twenty-somethings these days?

I am in mine right now...unemployed, not sure what I want to do with my life, I traveled all over the world and still don't feel like I can settle anywhere. One minute I want to go into fashion, the next I want to go back into banking (I left it because I HATED it) but now i'm not so sure since the money was good...I tried the hotel world it was fun but you get underpaid for working I-banker hours...I just don't know what to do with myself and its quite frustrating on me, my boyfriend, and my family!!

It started when my current BF and I broke up. (we were together for 2 years, then broke up for 2 years and now we've been back together for about 1) ANYWAY, after we broke up I got really depressed and immediatly jumped into a "rebound" relationship. The relationship lasted for a little over a year and ended very badly (with him physical hurting me and threatening my life) After that I moved in with 2 other girls. We all got along great and went out to the clubs together alot. Well, it progressed into a drug abuse problem. One night after partying and being up for 3 days straight partying, all my "friends" left our house to go party some more, I stayed home because I knew that I could not put anymore drugs into my body at that point. So Im at home all alone, completly high on atleast 3 different kinds of drugs and scared sh*tless. (there was someone passed out on the couch. I tried waking him up when his nose started bleeding, but he wouldnt wake up, and I honestly thought he was going to die) At that point I decided that this was not the life for me, I hated who I had become(my friends and I had kinda become the "it" girls on the party scene, everyone was so fake and shallow and I was no different) I hated who my friends had become and I just knew I had to get out. So I called my BF (we werent together at the time, just friends..for this exact reason) and told him everything that had been going on(at this point he only knew that I liked to go out to clubs and stuff, not about the drugs) and that I wanted out. He told me he would be there for me anyway he could, and he was. I got out and have been clean and sober (well, I still drink, no drugs though) ever since. And am now back with, who I am convinced is, the love of my life.

I feel like I'm going through one AGAIN even though I already had one about 5 years ago

Given my personality I think I'll always be searching and wondering if what I'm doing is good enough, or right enough. I don't see myself ever reaching an endpoint and saying: "Okay, I got it right this time, and it's for good."

I'm going through it right now haha. Nto too fun at times I must say. I have already packed up and went to Europe for 3 months but it still isn't helping...

awwww i wanna give all you girls a hug. mine was triggered when a bf i was head over heels with dumped me out of nowhere. i'm still in my crisis now (hate this job like crazy), but i'm just trying to keep my head up. just focusing on the good things. and for all of you who can't see the good things, look harder, they're out there. when i was really struggling, i would just be thankful for little things like sunny days or that i found a coupon for my favorite cereal or something. it might sound stupid, but it just feels good to put a smile on your face. keep your head up girls!

I'm about to be 25 in a few weeks and am definitely experiencing this.. I've finally figured out over the last year what I want to do as far as a career and am doing it now which is awesome. But, I'm figuring out that what I liked as far as qualities in men has changed TREMENDOUSLY.. and my choice of friends has changed quite a bit also.. My quarter life crisis I guess is just figuring out who my real friends are.. big time!

hmm..I dunno it all started to suddenly, and still not sure if its over or not.
I was seriously messed up and it was a tough time in my life but im back on the right track. but, what caused the crisis, im not sure. i just dont know how i could have been caught in such madness.

I agree with pop, I think I am always wondering, because I always think that something better might be out there, so I have to keep looking till I find it.

I have yet to get there, considering I'm still in college, but this show is relatable to almost everyone between the ages of 18-28. I've been watching it online since it's start and this show is absolutely amazing... I highly recommend it!!!!

I am right in the middle of it too. I am 29. Mine started with the end of what i thought was a relationship but what the guy saw totally differently. It has been over the last two and a half years that I have tried to deal with questions like "am I living where I should be?" "why am I still working where i am?" "what the hell is wrong with me?" "what is wrong with me that I am this old and can't get a guy to like me?" Now I am questioning my religion, my faith in myself, and I feel like total crap about myself. I have a lot of health issues too and that makes things even harder. I am currently trying to work on the self-image thing. I just take things day by day. I really cherish days where I am happy all day. It is hard, but I am constantly trying.

I am in the middle of the longest quarter life crisis EVER!

It started when I was 22 and in grad school. I went to an expensive school and did an internship for the first year of it (meaning I was living on loans). I was really uncertain about my job, my income, my relationships with people (ALL relationships incl. with friends and family).

Now, I really like my job but am studying for the LSAT and want to go to law school which will probably cause more finances anxiety. None of the relationship stuff has calmed down. At 25, I'm FAR less experienced than most people my age in romantic relationships (both in terms of physical and emotional connections), and that has led to a lot of really STRONG insecurities. Like, what if I'm just unlovable and nobody will ever like me?

Someone please tell me I will be happy SOMEday!!

No matter how hard things get in life just remember:

This too shall pass.

I'm definitely in my quarterlife crisis now.

I just graduated from college, but I haven't found a job yet. I've applied to law schools, but I'm not sure if I even want to go. I don't have a boyfriend or family tieing me down, so I have tons of options. But, the options are so overwhelming it's stressful.

I thought I went through one a couple years ago when I graduated school, but it seems like it hasn't really gone away! It was tough when I first graduated to find a job, but then I did and moved to a bigger city. After working at my job for a year and a half I decided it wasn't for me, left and moved back home to go to grad school. I'm very, very happy with my decision, and know I'm on the right track, but as the school year ends and looking for a job comes closer, I still have doubts that I'll succeed in what I want to do.

I think everyone faces these kinds of doubts though, and like others have said, this too shall pass. Just have to keep moving forward and have faith in yourself.

And I think you should all definitely check out Quarterlife -- the show is pretty addicting and only gets better!

graduating college was when all of my stability crumbled =/

Even though I'm happily married, sometimes I miss living with my best friends from college. We still all live in the same city, but it's not the same.

I'm almost to my college graduation and I still don't know what to do with my life!

Had one a couple of years ago. I was unhappy with my previous job and had too much self-entitlement after college. I wanted more but I was also too impatient to get it. Furthermore, I had an ex who discouraged me from pursuing my ambitions. My life only started to pick up exponentially after I dumped my ex and met my fiance who is a great motivator.

Uggh I had it last year and I am just starting to come out of it. It all started with my boyfriend and I broke up, and my mom was always close to me, like a best friends. SOOO naturally I asked her for her support and advice - and she basically dumped me at the same time saying that She needed her own life and she feels like mothers and daughters should not be close friends.

So I was dumped by my boyfriend of 5 years and my mom in the same day - yeah it sucked, my world was turned upside down. I have never forgiven my mother (although when she broke up with her BF she came running to me) but my BF and I were able to work things out.

I am TOTALLY having a quarter life crisis. In fact, I just had a hissy fit last night about it. I feel so lost and have no idea if what I am doing with my life is even worthwhile....blah.

I'm 21, and definitely in the middle of this now. Hopefully it won't last until 25, I don't know if I can stand a few more years of this. I'm just trying to figure out what I really want career wise, trying to find somebody to have a decent relationship with, etc.

i'm definitely in mine too and have been for the past few months... about to graduate from university, and I have no idea what i'm doing next year, i don't feel as though i have any true friends, and my relationship of almost two years has been on the verge of ending for a very long time now... i guess that makes me unattached, but i'm really scared for my future, and i just feel very lost and alone.. it's not a great feeling.

My relationship with my live-in boyfriend was lacking in a lot of ways.

Is there anyone out there that is over their quarterlife crisis?? I would like to hear some stories about what made you overcome the tough times.

Oh Man...Im so going through mine...

I have a few years until my true "quarterlife," however, I have definitely felt the effects of wondering where I am and where I'm going. I graduated from college last year at 20, feeling scared and single as I had broken up with a boyfriend I dated all through college. Then I came home to the Bay Area to have a year off and work before Law School; of course, this pretty much put me in a job that I wouldn't love to have for the rest of my life. This also gave me a lifestyle in which I would be tired when I came home from work and also not know many friends in the area. Now, I am deciding where I want to spend the next three years of my life and possibly the rest of my life. That definitely scares me and makes me wonder what is going to happen, what I'll be and where I'll be.

beram1220, I *think* I am out of the woods now (really hoping I didn't speak too soon!). So maybe I can tell my story...

It also started for me after college. I was like WTF am I going to do now? I found a job, but it kinda sucked. My boyfriend and I were fine, but the future felt uncertain. I thought, if we make it through the next couple of post-college years, we'll be fine! But it wasn't always easy. He was job searching and for a while living at home, so we didn't see each other as much as we were used to. I lived with roommates who I loved (and still love) but didn't love living with at all.

Things started to come together and feel normal, and then my dad got cancer. I spent a lot of time with him because I worked really close to my parents' house. He died within six months and even though I knew for the last three that it would happen, I wasn't quite prepared.

I went to therapy for a while and it helped over time. Soon after, I ditched the crap job and found a somewhat better one. My boyfriend and I moved in together and it was the best decision I ever made. I later discovered a way to transition to a different department I liked better at my job, making it much more satisfying. I also began a side business that's begun to flourish. Then I started a grad program that fulfills my creative side.

Now I'm engaged and all in all, life is good because I found ways to make it that way. Still, nothing comes easy--lots of work + grad school isn't always so fun. I am sad my dad is gone, but I have accepted it now instead of always asking "why" or thinking "what if?" And of course relationships take work--there was a while there when I was really worried my guy wasn't going to propose and I felt very hurt. But I think patience and trying to think clearly helps the most. And surrounding yourself with those that make you feel the best.

Ah I think I just started mine around when I turned 25 (how appropriate) This year I married an Australian and moved to Australia. Jobs should have been easy with my education (grad degree from MIT in videogames) I am a game designer. Unfortunately moving to Australia means moving out of my network. No one here has heard of MIT and the only videogame company is my husband's so I've been forced to take a job I don't want. I'm only here temporarily so I keep telling myself it is just for the time being but man....this isn't how I pictured things would be.

I miss iced tea without sugar so bad. Anything iced here has ice cream in it.

beram-read my 1st post to this question.

I'm 23! I dropped out of law school a few months ago, and now I'm thinking of going back. My boyfriend and I decided not to get married for a while, and now I have no idea where my relationship is headed. I'm considering joining the Air Force...I have a job right now that I love, but even my future here is uncertain since I just got hired because we have a big case...and if it settles..I have no idea what will happen to me!

I think the quarter-life crisis happens because you've graduated from undergrad, you are trying to figure out what to do with your life, and you are starting to have relationships that might potentially lead to marriage or serious commitment. I always thought university was full of drama, but not uncertainty like this!

i'm definitely having mine.i'm 24 and don't know what to do with my life. I graduated from college 2 years ago and currently work in ny. i ended up in a field that I just don't see myself in. The pay is decent and my colleagues are great but i just can't continue here. I want to go back to grad school but can't take that step without knowing what to pursue. so basically i feel stuck!

i'm single & wondering when the hell i'll meet a decent guy but i also realize i need to do some self-reflection & know myself better so i can make better decisions. friends are slowly starting to get engaged & going back to school so it makes me even more nervous. like i need to be doing things but feel stuck in a rut.

Don't want to sound ungrateful coz i AM very grateful that my family & friends are healthy & well.

I definitely went through one. Metaphorically, I was sitting in a first class flight heading where I didn't want to go. That was a BAD place to be, no matter how nice it looked on the outside.

Needless to say, I got off that flight at the first stop.

Nowadays, I am soooo much happier for it. I'm thriving.

I am so having one right now. I just turned 28, and my mind is always full of "where is my life going? How did I end up here?" kind of questions--as well as the inevitable disappointment of realizing I haven't achieved my (crazy ambitious) 21-year-old goals. But I think I'd call it less of a crisis than an adjustment--an adjustment away from the blind, blithe optimism of youthful adulthood, into a more realistic perception of matters.

And I still have those wild goals, I just now realize it takes more time and effort to reach them than my 21-year-old self imagined.

duuuuuuuude. i hope i've already experienced mine. i'm 20 years old and recently got out of a 5+ year relationship (hahaha, i knowwww). it definitely has changed my perspective on a number of things, but left me feeling sort of inadequate in other areas of my life such as my education & future career. come to think of it, i'm still trying to find myself... hmmm, well i hope it passes soon.

I've always knew what i wanted to do for a career. and i set the goals, and i have achieved them. i love my life right now.

yeah, i find that friends are weird and all that social drama. but i'm kinda cut and dry. if i don't like how you "roll", then i stop foolin' with you.

same with men. if you do something i don't like (like say you don't have children, and i find out a week later you're married with 2.5 kids . ..yes, this has happen to me) then i dump them. luckily i'm not needy for a man. i know that a few friends at this age go through that. but men come and go. and the right one (you know, who loves that i'm a bossy neurotic b*tch) will come along. no pressure.

i'm pretty financially stable at the moment. but if things get too hard, i know that it's a part of life.

i happy with my body, and i KNOW my morals and values. and i have a pretty decent connection with the Big G.

To Jude C:

i don't think anything is impossible or too ambitious. if you know what it takes to acheive it and you are persistant, then it should happen.

never discount any dreams you may have. . . unless you're ambitions were to be a Playmate who wins an Oscar.

Thanks, Asia84!

And...that second paragraph...

I know I'm going through it right now. I have a beautiful baby, a husband who supports us financially, we live in a great house, and live in a decent neighborhood. So why am I in such a crappy hole? For starters, when my husband and I got married (3 years ago) we moved 300 miles away from all our friends and family. We moved because he got a job offer he couldn't refuse. So, I finished my BA at the crappy university that was 40 miles away from home (yes I drove everyday); I got pregnant (planned), and am now a stay-at-home mom.

The reason I'm feeling really down lately, is because I'm at home with my baby all the time, and most times we don't leave the house for over a month. I'm in desperate need of seeing people and places. I can't remember the last time I had an intellectual conversation or any conversation. We live in a city that's small and that's just barely starting to update to what the rest of the bigger cities look like and have. That said, in order for us to go shopping or to go to restaurants we have to go to the surrounding cities. So, if we want Olive Garden or the mall, we have to drive an hour up north or an hour down south.

It really sucks because I can't even shop for a few simple things without driving a lot of miles. I know this may not be a big deal for most of you. But for someone who lived in a big city all her life, this is pretty tough. After 3 years I'm still trying to get used to the loneliness. Oh and it doesn't help living next to older folks or neighbors who keep to themselves and who don't really socialize.

I think I'm in it now.

I had not heard the term quarterlife crisis until it started coming up on my site bigwhitewall.com - it seems like a lot of people have one. And then i remembered that i did too - the cause was dating too many people simultaneously, a little dabbling in illegal substances and one hell of a lot of pressure in my work. I wish i had known at the time that it was more common. I find that having an anonymous space like ours is a great place to be able to talk about these things - as you don't always feel able to let others know that you are struggling with some stuff.

My quartelife crisis came in 2007 and it sucked. It really put a strain on my marriage and my mothering of my two beautiful little girls . . . I'm happy to say that my husband and I worked through it all and we're in the best place in our marriage/life but it'll be years before I can let go of the guilt and regret. Mine was caused by anger and confusion with a church (more cult-like than anything) I was a part of for many years and left about 4 years ago. But again, to be where we are now, I'd go through that crisis over and over again . . .